


The Cripple and The Shieldmaiden

by LordAvanti



Category: Vikings (TV)
Genre: Björn - Freeform, Björn Ironside - Freeform, England - Freeform, F/M, Fanfictie, Hvitserk - Freeform, Ivar Ragnarsson - Freeform, Ivar the Boneless - Freeform, Lagertha - Freeform, Multi, Ragnarsson, Shieldmaiden, The Cripple and the Shieldmaiden, Ubbe - Freeform, Vikings, cripple, ivar - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-04-01
Updated: 2017-05-19
Packaged: 2018-10-13 14:20:00
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 37
Words: 58,268
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10515492
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LordAvanti/pseuds/LordAvanti
Summary: When Torhild returns home after a two year long training as shieldmaiden she finds out that everything is changed. Not only is her mother queen of Kattegat, also the whole village growed. Some friends are dead, others not around. But their are always Ragnarsons and especially Ivar needs some extra attention, what only brings them both more together.





	1. Proloog

The world can be a cruel place, there is hatered, passion, voilence and love. If you don't learn to survive you never get the chance to prove yourself. It doesn't matter where you coming from, who your parents are ... it's your life and your life only. You have to stand up for it, survive in it and only that way you can rule the world. I'm Torhild, a daughter from Lagertha and I will tell you how I ruled that world. It doesn't need power, despite that I had it ... it needs confident, personality and a whole lot of fightspirit. This is my story ...


	2. // 1 //

Two years it has been since she last saw home. And now she was on her way back, more trained, more skilled, more fierce. Mighty fighter, as her name explained, Torhild didn't failed her mother. All her life she lived up to the idea of becoming like her mother, Lagertha, one of the most fearsome shieldmaidens their were. But instead of learning at home she traveled further through Norway, looking for challenges that would make her and the other young women better. And that she found ...

She stopped her horse on the hill, her cloak rocked on the soft wind, the white animal underneath her a little nervous. 'Home sweet home.' She said with a soft voice, petting the horse while looking to the small village underneath the hill. The others girls were excited to, the horses took it over and just started to move their bodies, begging for a fast gallop down to the village.   
'Your mother will be so proud Torhild.' One of the girls said. Torhild looked sideways, smiling from ear to ear.   
'She will be proud of all of uss.' Torhild replied before she pushed the animal forwards. In the two years she became to love the horse a little bit, he ran faster, his muscles moving underneath that soft white skin. The shield on her back smached against Torhild's back by the speed that her horse produced. The others laughed while galloping behind her. Torhild looked over her shoulder, grinning before she sent the horse on the pad towards the village. Their hooves maked an enormous cloud of dust. Some of the people in the village came outside, yelling towards their returned daughters. They were all shieldmaidens now, willing to defens this town, willing to follow Lagertha into battle.

Torhild drove her horse further, towards the little hall that was build in the center of the town. She held still, looked smiling at the building while she tried to remember how it was since she left two years ago. Her dark eyes glided over the surrounding, observing the people who came outside. They watched her but nobody said anything. She frowed her eyebrows and jumped from the horse, walking towards the hall. But when she pushed the doors she didn't saw what she expected. She expected her mother on the throne, or at least the owl her mother always carried around. But there was nothing but emptiness. 'Torhild.' She janked her head around to the old man who can inside. She smiled, recognized the man who saved her life when she was a little girl with a heavy fever. He looked at her, admiring the changes she went through. 'What did the gods do with you, so grow up and confident.' The man moved closer by, laid his hand against her cheek and she could only smile.   
'I'm glad to see the gods are still having faith in you.' She replied with respect. Her eyes stared to the throne again. 'Where is my mother? Björn?' She asked softly. Björn, her half brother was often away, on raids, following in the footsteps of his father, the famous Ragnar Lotbrok. Torhild could only dream of a father like him, her own father she never knew, died when she was to young to remember him.   
'There is a lot you have missed young warrior.' The old man said.   
'Is my mother dead?' She asked immidiatly. In two years a lot could change, she knew that the minute she drove away on her horse. But the loss of her mother wouldn't help her. She wanted to show her mother what became of her, wanted to battle, go raiding.   
'No but you better ride to Kattegat, all answers are there.' He bow like she was some kind of a princess now. She nodded, her cloak like a twister following her body back outside. What kind of answers she would find back in Kattegat?

The last time she was here it was a big village, without defenses, without major traveling in and out. Now their were people walking through big wooden gates, shieldmaidens all over the place, on the walls that never where their before. The fact she weared a shield give her enough status to go inside without interrogation. Their were extra builings, in the harbor layed about twenty ships, the people were trading. Torhild was supriced by all of this. Her horse walked through the people to the great hall were two shieldmaiden stood before the wooden door. 'Torhild?' One of them asked supriced. She didn't know the situation so she became carefull, distant. A good shieldmaiden was practical when necessary and this was sush a situation. 'Where is my mother?' She asked flat, chin a little up, strong and confident.   
'Inside.' The other woman pointed. Torhild nodded, jumped of her horse, left her shield with her horse and gave it to a stableboy who passed by. She took a deep before taking the couple of stairs to the great hall. 'Their are a couple of guests inside. But you look good princess.' One of the shieldmaidens said. Torhild looked to the woman and smiled a little by the comfort she got. Despite the fact that she was a full grown warrior now ... she was a little nervous to see what changed. Her long dark brown hair felt before her shoulders when she pushed open the doors. Their was music, amusment but all of that felt silent with the confident which torhild walked in. This was a place for kings and queens, she always knew it to be a place for Ragnar and Aslaug. But when she watched to the throne there was no Aslaug of Ragnar, it was her mother, the owl on the back of the throne. Torhild ignored the looks of all the people and walked to the front, held still before her mother who looked at her as if she was a stranger.   
'My daughter.' She finally said. Lagertha stood up, looking up and down over Torhild's body.   
'My queen.' Torhild bow. When Lagertha was close enough she laid her hands on both sides of Torhild's face.   
'The gods have answered my prayers.' Lagertha smiled before she turned to the people in the great hall. 'Torhild has returned home, not only stronger, not only a shieldmaiden but as the princess of Kattegat.' She announced before hugging Torhild. Torhild smiled proudly, glad to see her mother back after all this time.   
'You have a lot of explaining to do mother.' She said while pulling back.   
'That can waith, you look ready for battle, I want to hear all your stories.' Lagertha smiled while giving her a cup.   
'Little sister.' Said a voice from behind. Torhild turned her body toward the great hall and looked to Björn, he was looking at her with a grin, gazing his eyes over her body. 'Not so little anymore.' He laughed. She knew her half brother was big but it looked like he had grown again, or was it the beard? The hair maybe? She gave her cup back and trew her arms around him, greeted him with a kiss on his cheek.

It felt as a relief, to see both her mother and half brother safe and in Kattegat. She spended years here with Björn, it was still the best place to learn. And now her mother was on the throne, queen of Kattegat and more. Torhild had so many questions but didn't knew where to start with it. Her eyes met a couple of eyes that maked her smile a little. Yes, that was one of those question, where were Ragnar his sons. And the answer was right their, Ubbe stood in the corner, winking at her, Hvitserk on a chair besides him. No sigh of Sigurd. And then she met those ocean blue eyes and the little smile there was faided away. Ivar just stared, not blinking, not smiling, just intense staring and Torhild only stared back. Finally she nodded a little and the corner of his mouth slid a little up before she turned back to her mother who pointed her to a chair on the right of her. 'Tomorrow we hold a feast.' She said to the people and everybody stared to bawl.


	3. // 2 //

Torhild followed her mother to the bedroom, glad to have some time alone. Most part of the time she had sit still beside her mother while she was discussing raids white some earls and low kings. Her dark eyes had gazed over the people she knew, some had changed, others weren't even around. 'What happend to queen Aslaug mother?' She asked as soon as they both were alone. Lagertha pointed towards a chair that stood in front of a mirror.   
'I killed her.' She responded almost cold. Torhild knew about her mothers ambition to take back the throne in Kattegat.   
'And king Ragnar?' Torhild asked while Lagertha started to braid her hair. It felt good, she had missed this kind of moments, mother daughter moments. But when Lagertha didn't answered she looked through the mirror to her mother. She looked sad and she knew it immidiatly. 'He's dead?'   
'Killed in Engeland.' She nodded. Torhild looked down, to her hands in her lap. She knew how much her mother loved that men.   
'Did you got your revenge?' Torhild asked carefull. Lagertha didn't look up from the braiding, she was lost in her memories from the great Ragnar Lotbrok. So Torhild felt silent while she tried to figure out what was going on around her. 'I can't imagine Ubbe was happy about you killing his mother.' She finally spoke after a short time of silence. Lagertha looked up and nodded her head.   
'Ubbe is no threat, neighter is Hvitserk.'   
'Ivar?' Guessed Torhild. Lagertha finished the braids en stroke her hands over Torhild shoulders. 'The seer foresaw my dead by one of Ragnar sons.'   
'I won't let them.' Torhild immidiatly said. She would protect her mother no matter the cost. She was a warrior now, she would follow her mother everywhere.   
'I can defend myself Tohild.' She said with a loving voice. 'But you have to be carefull with Ivar, I saw him angry and he is not to be trusted.'   
'He is always angry mother.' Torhild responded softly. Lagertha looked at her but Torhild held her eyes on the many clips and crowns that now belonged to her mother.   
'I mean it Torhild, Ivar is changed, I don't want to see you near him.' Warned Lagertha. Torhild looked over her shoulder towards her mother and nodded slowly.   
'Offcourse mother.' She replied. Lagertha smiled.   
'All your dresses are here, put something nice on, we have to celebrate your return.' Lagertha said cheerfull before walking out. Torhild looked to here mother walking out before she looked back in the mirror. For this night she had to be a princess, tomorrow she could be a warrior again.

Wearing a dress felt good for Torhild, she loved the dresses she had. This one fell around here slim body, with soft colors and a certain elegance. She putted a little silver crown in her dark brown hair before she returned to the great hall. Her hands fold before her stomach she stood besides the throne of her mother. People came in to feast her return, some of them had gifts she graciously accepted. 'You look beautifull little sister, not longer a girl.' Noticed her brother, walking from between the people, looking at her with that tender smile of his.   
'You look strong big brother, not longer a boy.' She teased him back. He smiled and looked over his shoulder to all the people who came in. Slaves brought dinner and ale, everybody in a good mood because of her return.   
'There are men asking if you have married someone in your time away.' He grinned. Torhild looked to her brother, frowing her eyebrows.   
'That is fast.'   
'You have changed Torhild, you look strong, confident, more beautifull and you are a woman now. They all want you.' He maked her blush. She looked at the ground before her eyes went over the people again.   
'I'm not thinking about marriage right now Björn.' She smiled. He looked at her and nodded slowly.   
'Are you ready to raid? Battle?' He asked while greeting one of his man with a strong pat on the shoulder. Torhild nodded before looking back at her brother.   
'I didn't go two years away for nothing.'   
'Than you come with uss, we have a settlement in Engeland, you could marry a prince there.' That last one one rather teasing. She pulled on the braid in his hair and he laughed while drinking from his ale.   
'So you avenged your fathers dead?'   
'We all did.' Pointed Björn towards the people. Torhild looked from her brother tot the other people in the great hall. 'But it's not about me.' He said before taking a cup, giving it to Torhild before he turned to the people. 'Yesterday we conquered Engeland, today my sister returned as a warrior and tomorrow,' Björn felt silent, everybody looked at him curious. 'Ragnarssons and Torhild will go raid again!' He yelles. Torhild brought her cup up before they both began to drink. Björn looked at her, proud. 'Welcome back home sister, it's good to have a female warrior among all those boys.' He winked.

The journey had exhausted her but it wasn't to compare with the formal talks she had with the earls and people her. She sat beside her mother when her eyes fell on Ivar, who was leaning on the chair of his oldest brother, a little smile to seduce her. She nodded to some men who were watching her before she walked over to Ubbe, Hvitserk and Ivar. 'The sons of Ragnar.' She greeted them with a little bow. Hvitserk looked at her as if he wanted to take her somewhere nobody could disturb them.   
'Torhild.' Greeted Ubbe her with a little smile. '  
Can I say you look absolutly stunning, all grown up, ready to marry.' Said Hvitserk with a seductive smile.   
'Is that an invite Hvitserk?' She asked him friendly. He looked down her body and nodded slowly.   
'I prefer you over every princess they would serve me.' He agreed before getting a hard pet from his older brother on his head. Torhild grinned, taking a sip from her ale.   
'I thought at least one of you four would be married by now. Where is Sigurd?'  
'Dead.' Ubbe said and both the brothers looked at Ivar for a moment. Torhild looked at the youngest brother who was ... always disturbed, angry. He clenshed his teeth together while looking away. Torhild knew him well enough to not go further on the subject.   
'So did one of you get married?' She asked without asking after the dead of Sigurd. She didn't always liked that boy, but it was a shame, she hoped he died in the way the gods wanted it.   
'Yes, I did.' Ubbe said. Now she knew why he wasn't watching her like he always did before, like Hvitserk did.   
'With a slave.' Ivar said with a low voice, almost bored. It was the first time he said something and it was to annoy his brother. Torhild looked at him but he didn't looked back. Two years ago they could always talk with each other, he maked her who she was now. He never treated her like a girl, all careful and respectful. He treated her like he treated everyone else, he challenged her every time again and gave her the warriorspirit she now had.   
'Do you want to dance Torhild?' Hvitserk asked. She pulled here eyes away from Ivar and smiled towards Hvitserk.  
'Can you handle that?' She challenged him. Hvitserk drank his ale and gave his empty cup to his brother.   
'Two years I have waited for this moment Torhild.' He said with a seductive smile. He stood up and held his hand up to her. She took it and he leaded her to the space they had. Her mother looked with narrowed eyes, Torhild had already forgot what her mother had said about the brothers. Hvitserk pulled her closer, she looked up to him a little smilling. 'Did you miss me Torhild?' He wispered in her ears. She felt the sensation of it slipping down her spine. She pulled her head a little back, danced under his arm on the real Viking way.   
'Yes, maybe I have.' She nodded. In that moment she totally forgot that she had been two years away, that she was a warrior now. When she was younger she always had a crush on Hvitserk, seeing him like a man now brought that all back. She laughed with the dance they both did but when she looked toward the other brothers she saw the jealousy in Ivar's deep bleu eyes before he crawled away. He would never be able to dance with her and that saddened Torhild a little. She needed to talk with him, there was a lot bottering him and she was quite sure that the dead of his mother by her mother had something to do with it. There was also Sigurd who was dead and there was the fact that she missed him the most ... he had to hear it, before he destroyed something other than himself.


	4. // 3 //

Torhild looked over her shoulder towards her mother who was in a deep conversation with some earl to notice her daughter sneeking out. Even Björn wouldn't notice, he was to busy with some girl. Seeing that did her remind that she didn't saw Torvi during the feast. She slipped out of the great hall and stared up to dark sky. She didn't fully realized how happy she was to be back home, in the village she knew from when she was a child. She didn't actually grew up here but she was here a lot of time with Björn. Torhild walked over to the little beach were she found Ivar staring at the waves. Torhild just standed there for a moment, letting the soft wind through her hair while she looked at Ivar. It was his spot, he came always to this place when he was troubled about something. Torhild pushed her shoes out, lifted her dress a little and let her feet sink in the cold sand. He didn't heared her coming so she had all the time to observe him. His hair had grown so much, his body more muscular, his legs still bound together. 'Ivar.' She greeted him with a soft voice, he flexed his muscles out of reaction but didn't turned his head towards her. She felt guilt, for not speaking to him directly, for dancing with Hvitserk before talking to him. 'Can I sit?' She asked carefully standing besides him. He didn't say a thing, just kept staring to the waves. Torhild sighed and sat down beside him, wrapping her arms around her knees. She stared in silence to the waves, giving her mind some rest from the evening she had. 'I'm sorry to hear from your mother.' She finally said.   
'Are you?' He asked. Torhild moved her head and looked at him, his eyes hard and distant. She knew him as angry but he was different now.   
'I didn't know.'   
'No, how could you, you were away for two years.' He replied.   
'Ivar,'   
'Hvitserk is glad to have you back.' He interrupted her. He maked her angry, it was his best defense, being angry all the time. She didn't said anything and just stared to the sea. She thought he was glad to see her again, he smiled or at least grinned a little earlier. If he didn't wanted to talk, then there was no use in trying it. 'Does your mother know you are here?' He asked, rather sarcastic. She looked to him, angry, frustrated because he shut himself of every time again.   
'No, she thinks your dangerous, not to be trusted.' Torhild spilled. Ivar looked at her, his blue eyes piercing through hers.   
'She right, go Torhild.' He wanted to leave, she grabbed his arm.   
'Ivar please, talk.'   
'Now I have to talk?' He asked angry, turning back at her. 'You were away for two years, I had enough to talk about in those two years but you weren't there then. Go back to Hvitserk, he loves to talk.' Ivar spotted before he crawled away.   
'Why are you so angry with me Ivar?' She almost yelled, he froze for a moment. 'Is it because I went away two years or because of my mother killing yours?' She guessed. 'What happend to Sigurd?'   
'Nothing Torhild.' He hissed at her.   
'You killed him? Are you angry becaude of that?' But he didn't answered, he just crawled away. Torhild didn't stopped him this time, she just let him leave. 'Good talking Ivar.' She said to herself before standing up and walking to the great hall again. She forgot her shoes but it didn't mattered, she was tired and needed some sleep.


	5. // 4 //

Torhild was up early, but so was Kattegat. She walked through the great hall and sat besides her brother on the table. Her mother was nowhere to be found so she thought it would be a good moment to ask her brother after a couple of things. 'Were you here when mother killed Queen Aslaug?' She asked while waving her fingers through her lang brown hair. She switched the dress for her battlegear again, in the past years she was just to it.   
'No, me and Hvitserk were with uncle Rollo.' He replied. Rollo? Torhild looked at him, trying to make out of it was a good or a bad visit. 'It went well, he gave uss passage.' Björn answered her expressions. She smiled and looked back to her morning drink, a little supriced that after all this time he still could read her like an open book.   
'So she was defenseless?' She asked further. Björn stroke his hands over his almost bald head before he aswered again.   
'Ubbe and Sigurd were here, not that they were much of a help, they were tricked by a girl.' Torhild grinned with those words. Men where so easy to seduce, it was there weakness. 'Why do you ask Torhild?' He asked after a little silence. Torhild shook her head slowly, staring in the distance, thinking about Ivar. She didn't get much sleep, his words kept her a little bussy during the night. She looked away from the wall to her mother who walked in with Astrid by her side. Astrid looked first at Björn before she turned to Torhild.   
'Nice to have you finally back.' She said politly. Torhild didn't care much about Astrid, because she was involved with her mother. And by the looks of it with her brother to.   
'Astrid.' She replied polite before pulling a distgusted face when the others weren't watching.£'What will you been doing today daughter?' Lagertha asked. Torhild looked up and took a quick look outside.   
'Catching up with some friends. I want to know a little what happend the past two years.' She answered. Lagertha nodded and sat down on her throne.   
'Tonight we will discuss the raids, join uss.'   
'Absolutly.' Torhild nodded with a smile before standing up. It felt like she never left in the first place, everything she did was just normal, the talks were normal and it made her more confident to move on.

When she walked along the water she saw the brothers catching fish, or at least each other. Torhild stood still and looked with frown eyebrows towards the two of them running through the water. She didn't noticed Ivar who sat on his usual place. Hvitserk regconized her immidiatly and ran with his fish on a stick out the water towards her. 'Is this your usual routine when you're not raiding?' She asked with a smile while trying to avoid the fish.   
'What are you usual doing in your spare time?' He asked with the same smile as yesterday. His eyes gazed again over her body and she felt almost flattered.   
'Training.'   
'Is that a challenge?' He asked immidiatly. Torhild grinned and tilted her head a little, lifting her shoulders.   
'Maybe.' Her eyes fell on Ivar who was watching them both. Hvitserk followed her eyes and narrowed them a little, but he didn't get further on it.   
'I missed you last night.' Hvitserk said while wrapping his arm around her shoulder. She had to admit, she loved his attention, his jokes.   
'I can bet you missed me the whole damn two years.' She replied softly. Hvitserk his eyes got a little more intense and Torhild only watched him with some curiosity.   
'When I was with a woman I only could think of you.'   
'Oh really?' She laughed. He pulled her away from the waterside, out of sight from Ivar and Ubbe.   
'Is that so hard to believe? Torhild, you're the most beautifull woman in Kattegat. And your a skilled fighter now, will you come on raids?' He asked. She started to blush by his words and looked down to the ground for a moment.   
'I will be there tonight, to discuss the raids.' She looked up at him again, his face a lot closer by the tight grip he had over her shoulder. She never thought that she would have the same feelings for Hvitserk as when she left, but he proved her wrong. 'And I was talking with your brother last night. Not really talking, he is angry with me.' She said a little silent. Hvitserk bitted his lip and shook his head.   
'He is always angry since,' he fell silent and Torhild studied his face for a little while. When they came on the great hall he let her loose, stood still before her.   
'He killed Sigurd?' She guessed.   
'Sigurd challenged him, he got angry. He drew his axe and trew it to Sigurd, right in his chest.' He pointed on his own chest, his eyes on a horse that stood besides a farmer. Torhild lifted her hand and stroke a finger over his cheek, Hvitserk looked at her and smilled a little. But she could see some sadness in his eyes.   
'It's not your fault. I'm sorry for your brother Hvitserk.' She said comforting.   
'I could talk him out of it, if you were here it wouldn't have happend.'   
'I was not that good with Ivar.'   
'Better than uss.' He grinned slowly. Torhild looked towards the beach and tried to wrap her head around it. She had knew it all that time, she knew that Ivar would kill somebody with his own anger.   
'Maybe I can try and talk some sence in him.' She suggested slowly. She wasn't ready to gave up on Ivar, despite the fact she had always loved Hvitserk, Ivar pulled more loose in her than he ever could do.   
'Be carefull Torhild, he is unpredictable, more than usual.' Hvitserk said softly. Torhild nodded and looked towards her brother.   
'Where is Torvi?'   
'Dead, just as Helga. You missed a lot Torhild.' Hvitserk replied. Her mother came outside and Torhild walked away from Hvitserk.   
'I see you tonight.' She winked at him.   
'You still didn't show me that fierce warrior part of you.'   
'Maybe I will.' She replied. She felt his eyes in her back. Torhild turned around and looked at him. 'I really missed you Hvitserk.' She said. His smile grew bigger before he bow a little.   
'My love.' He said as an goodbye. Torhild shook her head and walked the way to her mother back. Lagertha was looking at Hvitserk who jogged back to his brothers.   
'What? Is he dangerous to?' Torhild asked sceptical. Lagertha looked away from Hvitserk back to her daughter and carefully shook her head.   
'I like you to train with the other shieldmaidens, see what you can learn them.' She proposed. Torhild smilled and nodded right away.   
'Sounds fun.' She accepted.


	6. // 5 //

Torhild loved to watch her mother fight, she was the main reason that Torhild wanted to be a shieldmaiden. Her mother looked fierce, whole in black, her blond hair braided so it wouldn't get in the way of the exercise. Nobody was as good as Lagertha and she prooved that by tackeling Astrid to the ground. Torhild couldn't keep a little smile behind. She looked at her brother for a moment who stared intensly towards Astrid. Torhild shook her head, focusing all her concentration on the training she all had on a plane field. Her mother showed everyone how it's done before she let Torhild train against one of her shieldmaidens. Torhild took the wooden sparring stick and stood opposite of the woman she didn't really knew. In the past two years she had trained so hard, was never really nervous but now ... it was the first time she could prove herself to her mother, her brother, half the village that came to watch. The woman bow shortly and Torhild nodded only, turning her polse so that the stick found his balance in her hand. And than the woman attacked, Torhild parried the first blow and pushed the woman two steps back again. The most important thing she had learned was to be in control of your emotions. She couldn't let her anger or frustrations go, she couldn't be sad or act out. She couldn't give attention to everyone who stood watching. Every move the woman maked came against a wall from Torhild. Her fellow shieldmaiden couldn't find a weak point in Torhild her defens and that brought a little grinn on her lips. 'Attack sister.' Björn said. Torhild maked a diversion with her stick, turning half before smaching her stick on the weak points in the back of her knies. There was so much power in the action that the woman her legs flew underneath her body and she fell with her back against the ground. Torhild turned her stick and pointed it to the woman her throat. She looked up to her brother who nodded approvingly. Her mother stood besided the fire and smiled proudly. 'Can you handle your big brother?' Björn asked while pulling his sword. Torhild tilted her head and took a big breath.   
'Sure want to try.' She gave in. She turned to some friends, saw Ivar lurking from over a rock. She looked for a moment to him before she took a sword and axe.   
'Two weapons?' Asked her brother curious.   
'I'm more in balance with two.' She answered him. Björn was a whole lot bigger than she was but she didn't let herself get intimidated by that. But Björn was ruthless, his power took more energy in the battle than she thought it would. She could hit him one time ... he could hit her a lot more.   
'Your shoulders are a weak point.' He said after hitting her there again. Torhild started to sweat, breathing heavy but didn't gave up until she supriced her brother at least once by almost slitting his stomach. But the attack back forced her on the ground, she dropped her weapons and gave herself over. 'I'm proud of you sister.'   
'You beat me.' She panted. He smiled and helped her up.   
'You rule with your head, what makes you a good warrior.' He said while gaving her a good shoulder pet, what really hurted. Her mother took her in an embrace.   
'You have grown so much my daughter. Go raid with your brother, one day you will be as great as he is.' She smiled tenderly. Torhild nodded and cachted her breath for a moment, looking for Ivar but like she though he was already gone.

Her brother left two big bruises on her schoulder. She looked at it throught the mirror and pulled her dress over it before getting the braids out of her hair. Her long dark hair felt over her shoulders and covered all what was left to see from those bruises. The great hall was filled with a handfull earls and distant kings. Her mother sat on her throne, Björn stood with his brothers. Only Ivar sat a little further. 'Still mad?' Torhild asked him while sitting a little further from him. He didn't look at her, he looked at Lagertha. His gaze was so strong, so angry that Torhild almost was willing to asked to keep his anger for himself. But her attention leaded towards Ubbe and Hvitserk who wher wathing her, Hvitserk said something and they both looked kind of impressed.   
'I heard you kicked some serious ass.' Ubbe grinned.   
'I lost from my brother.' She replied while looking at the other people. Some of them she knew, others not.   
'Everyone looses from Björn.' Hvitserk said. She looked at him, one eyebrown up.   
'I don't need you comfort.' She smiled. He chuckled and sat beside her, shoulder against shoulder, like she was just to it from him.   
'The great heathen army turns back to Engeland, because I think we have not seen it all.' Her brother began loudly. Half the men started to bawl, the other half nodded intensly. 'Thanks to King Ecbert we have a settlement there, what we gonna use. I know others want to raid further.' Björn went on, his gaze fell over Ivar for a moment and Torhild followed that gaze towards the youngest son of Ragnar.   
'Didn't you want to go back to Paris and beyond?' One of the earls asked. Björn nodded, started to walk around between the leaders there were.   
'Some of my men are still in Engeland, if we go there first we can assamble the army again and sail to Paris.'   
'Will uncle Rollo give you save passage again?' Hvitserk asked. Torhild looked to him before she looked at Björn. It was nice to be in this kind of meetings again. She didn't respond much of what was said but it was good to hear the plans.   
'He will.' Björn nodded. There was that grinn on Hvitserk his lips while he leaned back again, his hand against the small of her back. Torhild frowned her eyesbrows and gave him a look, he only gave a promessing look back.   
'My son, I want you to bring King Harland back from Engeland, he has to pay for his act of war against Kattegat.' Lagertha began. There felled a silent that Torhild didn't quite understand. 'King Harald his men attacked Kattegat while we were in Engeland.' Hvisterk explained.   
'How bad?'   
'Bad enough. It got Torvi killed, she lost a lot of shieldmaidens.' He asnwered quietly. Torhild looked back at her mother but like always she sat there with a straight face.   
'King Harald has his ambitions in Engeland for now.' Björn began against his mother.   
'He should die.'   
'I will punish him mother.' Björn said. Lagertha looked away from her son to Torhild.   
'Will you go to Engeland?' She asked her daughter. Torhild felt all eyes on her now.   
'If you want me to go.' Torhild said slowly.   
'Than Torhild will punish King Harald, if she's up to it.' Lagertha decided. Torhild bow her head a little as a sign she understanded it. She never had punished someone before but if it was so bad as Hvitserk said it was than it couldn't be that hard to do. Besides, she never liked King Harald much.   
'Are my brothers coming?' Björn asked looking towards his three brothers.   
'I will.' Hvitserk agreed. He did it because Torhild went to, she wasn't that stupid.   
'I will join you.' Ubbe nodded. Torhild looked towards Ivar who looked at Lagertha before looking at Björn and nodded.   
'Good, we sail over a week.' Björn decided. Torhild felt a schivering from excitement down her spine. Her first raid and that in the company of the sons of Ragnar. Torhild looked at Ivar who crawled outside without anybody noticing him leaving. She waited a couple of minutes before she stood up and walked out of the great hall. She looked into the dark but nowhere she found those bleu sharp eyes. Torhild sighed and leaned against a wooden pole outside the builing. They were pratcical best friends and now he didn't wanted to talk to her. She turned her head a little when she heared someone walking outside. She felt two hands around her waist, his breath against her ear.   
'Can I have you now?' Hvitserk asked quietly. Torhild smiled and let her head rest against his shoulder.   
'You always had me Hvitserk.' She replied wispering.   
'No, you were always out of reach.' Hvitserk never gave up on her. Björn was always so protective about Torhild, but she were a woman now and Hvitserk knew that her brother couldn't protect her anymore. It wasn't that bad, Torhild always had a weak heart for Hvitserk. She turned around in his arms and looked up to him, his eyes so intens and bright, his embrace almost safe. 'Can I take you home with me?' His fingers stroke her cheek and she closed her eyes a little before she nodded and looked back at him. He pressed his lips against hers and she trew her arms around him. Hvitserk pushed her backwards the little stairs off and she started to laugh by the tight grip he held on her. Hvitserk had a talent of making everything so easy, like there was nothing other on the world than just him and her. He brought her to his home, a new place for her. She walked the house in and looked around but the only thing he could look at was her. She felt his body against her back again, his lips against her bruiced shoulder.   
'Carefull.' She said. Hvitserk almost tenderly stroke her hair over one shoulder so he could she half the bruice on her shoulder.   
'Did Björn did this?' He asked, his fingers on the knot that held her dress together. She looked over her shoulder, looking at the bruice that covered half her colarbone before nodding. He untied the knot on the back and pushed her dress over her shoulder. 'It will heal.' He wispered, pressing gently kisses over the bruice. Torhild turned around and kissed him like she never had before. 'I really missed you my love.' He wispered against her lips. Yes, she did to and she showed him that now.


	7. // 6 //

Torhild waked up by the long lingering from fingertops over her skin. She smiled a little, eyes still shut before she responded by shivering. Hvitserk snuggled his noise behind her ear and pressed his lips against her neck. 'My sleeping beauty.' He greeted her goodmorning. Torhild opened her eyes and turned on her back so she could look at him.   
'You're cheerful.' She responded with a little raw morningvoice.   
'I spend the night with you, there is lot to be cheerful about.' He answered with a meaningful look. She chuckled by the memory of last night and pulled him in for a kiss. His lips wandered, giving a teasing bite in her neck. She started to laugh and beated him on his shoulder.   
'Hviserk.' She still laughed.   
'I can't get enough from you.' He confessed. Torhild felt loved for the first time in the two year she was away. She stroke her fingers over his jawline while she looked in his eyes. 'Can't we marry?'   
'Are you that in love?' She teased him.   
'You're not?' He asked back.   
'I barly know you Hvitserk.' She began. He started to laugh, shook his head, resting his head on her chest while laughing further.   
'We know each other since we were kids, there is no one who knows you better than I do. Exept for you mother and brother.' He immidiatly went in defens. He wanted this, he was in love, dreamy even. And it was kind of addorable in fact.   
'That's not true.' You protested quietly. He didn't know her that well, in fact, if she had some dark secret she wouldn't tell it to Hvitserk.   
'My brother knows you better.' He said, obvious he didn't liked that idea.   
'Yes, Ivar knows me better.' She pushed Hvitserk with his back in the bed and hung over him.   
'He can't do what I do Torhild.' Hvitserk said. Torhild shook her head and pressed her lips against his.   
'But you can't do what he can.' She wispered back, teasing. Hvitserk gave her a confused look for a moment.   
'He can't please a woman.' He protested. Torhild sat up and took her dress from the ground.   
'I wasn't talking about that.'   
'What are you talking about than?' He asked. It was funny how upset he became about the subject. Torhild putted her dress on before she turned to Hvitserk again.   
'You have a lot to learn.' She winked. She wanted to walk away but Hvitserk jumped out of bed, all naked and stopped her from walking out.   
'He is younger than me.' Yes, Ivar was. Ivar was the youngest of them all.   
'He fought more battles,' she pauzed and pointed her finger against his head. 'in his head.' She ended before opening the door. She turned to Hvitserk and looked over his naked body. 'You look good by the way.' And she walked out, leaving him with a puzzling look.

 

After she went home for some more practical clothing it cost her hardly the time to find Ivar. She would stalk him, whole day if nessicary ... only to get him talking. There was a thick layer of fog between the trees when she entered the forest. His cursing she could here from a mile away so it wasn't that hard to find him. He sat besides a chariot ... Torhild looked at it, confused and impressed on the same time. A chariot? Why the hell did he need a chariot? When she walked further she saw a white horse behind a tree, the animal snorted scared and Ivar looked over his shoulder to Torhild. 'Ivar.' She greeted him careful. He didn't say anything, like she was used from him by now, and just get further with was he was doing. 'Floki made it?' She asked while walking around the thing, slightly smiling when she saw the use of it. 'To give you the legs you don't have.' She wispered. She looked at Ivar, who was still to stubborn to give in. 'Can you say something?' She asked almost desperate.   
'Good night with my brother?' That were his words. She felt the anger rising up in her chest when she turned her body to him.   
'He is glad to have me back. It's not my fault Ivar that your mother died, that your father died, that you killed your brother. You did that all by yourself.' She felt silent while she walked towards him. 'I thought we were friend. Yes, I ran of for two years and it served me good. Maybe you should do that to.' She almost yelled, pointing the little dagger she had drawn to his chest. 'What do you want me to say?'   
'That you missed me!' He yelled back. His face was red from anger while her face flattened from all emotions. She was speechless for a moment. Torhild pulled her dagger away without losing eye contact with him.   
'I missed you. I missed you more than I missed Hvitserk of my brother. I came to the beach that night to say you that, to give you the comfort I couldn't give you than. But you didn't let me in, just as you don't let me in now. I'm angry with myself for not being her when you needed me,'  
'You have a funny way of showing it.' He interrupted her. She backed away one step and shook her head.   
'It was hard to step away from you two years ago, but it won't be so hard now if you keep acting like this.' She wispered, tears welling up in her eyes. Where was that warrior spirit from the past two years now? She walked away, she wanted to get away from him but he grasped her wrist. Torhild turned her head and looked at him, angry, ready to win this fight for once.   
'Don't.' He begged. She looked at him, trying to convise herself to give him another change. 'Don't go.' He repeated. She looked at his fingers around her wrist, he moved his fingers a littled so her hand felt in his.   
'Why are you doing this to yourself? Keeping everyone away?' She asked him. He didn't looked at her but even than she could see his emotions change.   
'I don't wanna hurt anybody else.'   
'You're not gonna hurt me Ivar.' She wispered.   
'I killed my brother.' He said torn up in his anger again. Torhild walked back at him, laid her hand against his cheek, forcing him to look up.   
'And he deserved it, he had that one coming, everybody knew that.'   
'He was my brother Torhild.' Be wispered in despair. 'I lost my mother, I lost my father, I lost all the thing I loved, who loved me.'   
'I love you, Ivar, you are my best friend. I'm sorry that I couldn't be there for you then but please let me be here now. I missed you more than anything in the world.' She smiled a little, to give him comfort with her words. It wasn't the kind of love she had with him like she had with Hvitserk. She loved Hviserk in another way. With Ivar ... she didn't really understand it but she felt the connection, it was already there for a long time. He was her best friend, maybe it could be more one day but for now she needed him back. The boy who was worth all her secrets, for who she would die if needed. He was her partner in crime, the boy she needed to be with if she doesn't wanted to talk, her childhood playbuddy. When nobody really understood Ivar, then there was Torhild and she understood him to much and that was that connection they both so hard needed with eachother.   
'I missed you to.' He nodded slowly and with that was all his anger and hate towards her away, enough so she could move further to the next problem ... the fact he wanted to kill her mother.


	8. // 7 //

'Where are you going?' Lagertha asked her daughter. Torhild pulled herself in the saddle before facing her mother.   
'Take some time for myself, clear my head.' She aswered. Torhild always needed some space just before a new adventure. Tomorrow they would sail back to Engeland, tonight was the sacrifice and now ... she just needed to free her mind, look for some focus. Lagertha nodded and Torhild pushed her horse forward. The white animal pressed his hooved eager in the road, happy to be outside again. The wind flew through her hair, she enjoyed the silence, the nature around her. She rode to the highest part of Kattegat, a vieuw over the sea, the village where the people were hardly to recognize. She let her horse behind in the forest were he could eat while she wandered to the egde of the kliff, looking down on Kattegat. This village had changed so much, not only the people grew, the economy grew, even the houses got bigger. How much she loved some silence in her head now, she wasn't exactly here for that. It didn't took long before she heared another pair of hooves. An equally white horse but with a chariot behind it. She looked at Ivar for a second before she looked back at the vieuw again, it was a beautiful day.

'Why all the way up here.' He grinned when he arrived beside Torhild.   
'Complaining because it is a to long walk?' She asked him right back. He looked up at here, his eyes full of mischief. He loved that about her, the stupid jokes that others wouldn't dare to say in his face. She smiled a little and went sit in the grass beside him. 'My mother would kill me if she knew.' Torhild mumured. Lagertha had warned her not to come in contact with Ivar. Past week she didn't saw Ivar much and if she saw him than it was with her mother nearby and if stares could kill ... well, Ivar would. So, Lagertha, even Hvitserk hadn't noticed that she and Ivar talked again.   
'They she has to kill me first, what is a good thing, then I have a reason to try killing her.' He said without any form of hessitation. Torhild stared at him until he looked back at her.   
'She is my mother Ivar.'   
'Yes and Aslaug was mine.' He reacted. Torhild nodded and looked back at Kattegat. She knew there would be a moment in wich Ivar would try to kill her mother. And in that moment she would have to choose between her mother and Ivar knowing that Björn would try to get revenge on the one who killed his mother. It would be a circle that never would stop. It took Ivar always several minuts to let his cold hard personality melt down for her so she just sat there, enjoying the vieuw. 'Are you really gonna come?' He asked after a while. Torhild frowned her eyebrows and looked at him, a little supriced by his words.   
'Offcourse, why?'   
'Why don't you stay with your mother, protect her?' He said it almost as if it was the most logic thing to do. But Torhild didn't understand where this was coming from.   
'So you can kill her when you come back?' The words came out before she could hold them back. Ivar sighed and stared to Kattegat what was just a small image from where they both sat. She imagined the raids for next days, her first travel, her first real fight against an enemy. She had dreamed of this for a very long time.   
'What are you thinking about Torhild?' He aksed, a little softer this time. Torhild looked at him and smiled a little.   
'How we used to discuss raids when we weren't more than ten years old.' She smiled. Her dark hair felt over her schoulder and she slipt her fingers through it, still dreaming of those innocent moments when she and Ivar sat before the little cottage of Floki. When Ivar was rejected by his family, Floki was the one who took him in on behalf of his mother. Torhild always sneeked of to Floki to see Ivar when they were in Kattegat for business. The thoughts of those memories gave him a small smile on his lips, a smile you rarely saw with Ivar. He was always so angry, twisted inside himself that others didn't see much joy. Torhild saw that other version of Ivar often and she enjoyed every smile he gave, because she knew it was so damn precious.   
'You always said that you would took me on the back of your horse.'   
'Not really nessecary now.' She grinned with a gaze over her shoulder to his chariot. 'Maybe I am the one who needs a ride now.' He chuckled and she felt back in the grass, strentching her armes above her head. 'How is Engeland?' She asked curious. She saw that Ivar was thinking about it, that he let the memories of Engeland pass in front of his eyes.  
'Different,' He began. 'They have castles, better armor,'  
'Less strenght?' She guessed. His smile grew bigger on his face as he looked at her and nodded. Vikings were know because of their strenght and brutality.  
'I'm not a teamplayer Torhild.' He said eventually. She pushed herself up on her elbows and looked at him, totally confused. 'I rather have you here than there where I need to keep an eye on you.' He explained his earlier words.  
'I'm a shieldmaiden, I can handle myself Ivar. Why are you so worried? You're never worried, ever.' Torhild tried to convice him. 'Isn't this what we always dreamed of, raiding together?'  
'Will you stay close if I ask you to?' He ingnored her totally and she trew him a frustrating glance.  
'Will you sit still if I want to take of your wounds?' She, on her turn, ignored his question. They were both the stubborn kind, how much friendship they had, he never let her touch him. Just as she refused his protection.  
'Please Torhild, work with me here.' He almost begged. She tilted her head and gave him a amused smile.  
'Getting worried Ivar?' She teased him.  
'About you always.'  
'That's the first time you say that. I won't be reckless, I will listen to Björn and do as I ask. I only won't follow your command because you only want to keep me safe.' She pushed her finger against his chest and looked how he rolled his eyes. 'Admit it.'  
'Is it that bad? That I want to keep you safe.'  
'No, it makes me feel loved.' She aswered honestly.   
'You can feel loved with my brother to.' He mumured. She sighed and shook her head while thinking to some good words to get it in his big stubborn head.  
'Hvitserk and I had a discussing about you. I said you knew me better, he said you couldn't do what he could,' You felt silent and stood up, stroke the creases out of your dress.  
'What did you say to that?' He asked curious. Torhild turned her head and looked at him.   
'I replied the same thing, he can't do what you do.' She smiled tenderly before walking slowly back at her horse.  
'Torhild.'  
'Ivar?' She replied while turning around and looking at him. He lay on his stomach, watching her with his strong intens look. If he gave her that look the felt like he saw right throught her. But what he was going to say dissapeared in a little doubt before he looked at his old self again, cocky and confident.  
'She you at the sacrifice.' He finally said.  
'Thats not what you were going to said but yes, I see you tonight.' She said goodbye before walking the last part back to her horse that stood besides the chariot of Ivar. She pulled herself in the saddle and looked at Ivar who sat with his back towards her, still looking at Kattegat. She smiled a little, glad that everything felt back on his place.


	9. // 8 //

Torhild putted on a white dress, equal with her mother. They braided their hear up and putted some gold on their face. 'Are you ready to give the gods a sacrifice?' Her mother asked. Torhild turned around, stood before her mother and pushed her chin a little higher in confident.   
'I'm ready mother.' She replied swiftly. Lagertha smiled a little and stroke her fingers over Torhild her cheek.   
'You're so much matured. The gods did well for you, I hope they favor you in battle to.' She whispered. It was one thing Torhild always wanted to do, making her mother proud. And the look Lagertha gave her now radiated that proud. Torhild looked to the door when she heard the sound of drums. A sacrifice was a very important and serious ritual. Everybody was calm, rather focust and praying to the gods for the save passage through Engeland tomorrow. They would offer two animals to the gods, a horse and a goat, both of significant value within the culture. Lagertha took her owl on her shoulder and walked before Torhild outside. Torhild wasn't nervous, it was like the gods give her a certain calmness, it maked her confident, just as confident as her mother was.

The people of Kattegat, the warriors of other villages, the earls and distant kings who would sail with the ragnarssons tomorrow stood in a large circle around a kind of altar. Lagertha stood still on the steps of the great hall and looked at her people. Torhild stood beside her, her eyes first rested on her brother who looked at both of them with the most of love and pride. Then her eyes traveled further, to Ubbe who stood besides his wife, Hvitserk who looked at her like she was a goddess herself and finally Ivar. The intensity they exchanged chased the goosebumps over her body.   
'Today we honor the gods. Tomorrow will my beloved childeren, your daughters, sons, friends and family sail back over the sea to Engeland. We wish him the best of luck,' Lagertha looked a small moment to Torhild before she got futher. 'but let tonight be a feast for the gods so that they give or beloved ones a clear path towards destiny.' Some farmer brought a nice looking dark horse to the middle, not far behind an other one with a brown goat. Torhild walked down the steps to the man with the daggers laying on a piece of silk. Torhild took the dagger and her mother followed. Their were two empty bowls nearby the animals. It was like the horse smelled it, he snorted anxious when Torhild walked closer. She knew the ritual almost out of her head, had seen it a hundered times but it was the first time she did it herself. She petted the animal, looked in his strong brown eye.   
'You doing uss a great honor my friend.' She whispered to the animal before pushing the dagger to his throat and slittling it. It didn't took the animal long before he felt through his knees and died, his blood filling the bowl. Torhild looked to her mother who did the same with the goat before they both looked to the sky, to the gods. When she looked back to the people she saw Ivar staring back at her with a smile she couldn't put to words. She know he was all for blood and sacrifices, but that longing in his eyes maked her body trill with excitement.

Everbody moved in line for a personal ritual. Lagertha shelled a bundle with strong herbs through the blood before blessing everybody by spatting some of the blood on their faces. And while everybody was with Lagertha getting blessed Torhild took the bowl with the blood of the horse and got around with everybody else. When she came with Ivar she crouched before him, he looked at her with that same glare as earlier. She putted her fingertips in the blood, putted them against his temples while running her fingers down over his face, leaving a trale of blood all over him. She smile a little when she saw him close his eyes, like he was receiving this gift from the gods themselves.   
'May the gods be with you tomorrow Ivar the Boneless.' She whispered. He opened his eyes and smile at her while putting his thumb in the blood. He putted his thumb on her forehead and runned the blood between her eyes, over het nose and lips towards her chin.   
'I rather have them keeping an eye on you, princess of Kattegat.' He said. She couldn't replie, his thumb lingered on her lips before he pulled his hand back so she could get to the next person.

Torhild felt never more strong than she did now. The whole ritual brought her in a weird state of excitement. Her body was eager to get on a ship and the feast that followed didn't tempered that kind of desire. Hvitserk didn't mind it that she sat with her mother and brother when he came for her.   
'Can I steel Torhild for a moment?' He asked her mother polite. Lagertha looked at Hvitserk, as if she was douthing his intentions. Torhild knew his intentions, it would get her back in bed with him.   
'Offcourse.' She nodded after a long look at the boy.   
'Who says I want?' She teased Hvitserk who almost pulled her out of her seat. He tilted his head and gave here a long warm almost charming look she couldn't resist. She stood up and followed him outside. 'What is it that you want Hvitserk?' She asked smiling, already knowing what he wanted.   
'You.' He wrapped his arm around her and pulled her against his chest.   
'Tell me something I don't know.' She grinned. He placed his lips against hers and she let him get his kiss.   
'Please?'   
'No.'   
'Why not?' He asked between to kisses through.   
'You can't distract me.' Torhild placed her hand against his chest and pushed him back a little, looking at him with a tender smile.   
'It may be our last night.' He suggested. She shook her head.   
'That is to decide for the gods. Let it be a,' she stopped for a moment, runned her finger over his chest. 'Let it be a longing that gets you through battle.' She finally spoke. Hvitserk smiled, a strong charming smile and he maked a small bow.   
'For you everything my love.'

She runned her feet through the sand, looking at the steady sea before her. Torhild sat there in complete peace with herself. It didn't take long before she heared the familiar sound of Ivar crawling over the sand. She didn't looked over her shoulder, she just looked at the sea. Tomorrow they would sail and it was if her whole life was build to this exact moment. She felt Ivar as nearby as Hvitserk earlier was. His warm breath behind her on her colarbone. She reacted on him, more than she would do with his brother. He pressed his lips softly against the lower of her neck, putting one kiss there before he putted one a little higher. Torhild closes her eyes, absorbing the feeling of Ivar his lips against her neck. It was the first time he did something like this but she saw it coming. After she gave the gods her sacrifice he had looked at her with those intense bleu eyes she couldn't ingore.   
'You can't sarcrifice an animal, cover yourself in blood and think I wouldn't react on that.' He whispered against her ear, his words were confident, cocky, his true self. He let his head rest on her shoulder and she turned her head a little to look at him.   
'Keep your head in the game Ivar.' She advised him with a soft loving smile, running her finger over his jawline.


	10. // 9 //

Torhild stood beside her mother, watching the twenty shieldmaidens who would come with her to Engeland. It was her first raid and it would be with an responsibility over a very small part of the army. 'Don't forget to punish King Harald for me.' Lagertha said without looking at Torhild, her eyes were settled on Ivar who crawl over the pier towards the boat he shared with his brothers. Torhild followed that gaze of her mother to the man who was yesterday so nearby. If Lagertha would know of it she would propably punish her daughter herself. Nothing happened between her and Ivar, they just sat there, his head on her shoulder ... his warm breath against her neck. Ivar noticed that he was watched and turned his head towards Torhild and Lagertha. His face expressions were inscrutable, he and Lagertha changed looked that made Torhild walked away. Her brother stood besided Ubbe who smiled when she walked over.   
'You look ready Torhild.' He noticed her confident in the steps she took.   
'As ready as I can be.' She nooded while looking up to Björn. He was completly in his role as the leader of this army.   
'Say your goodbye's sister.' He finally said while walking towards one of his men. Torhild looked him walk away before she turned her head to Ubbe again.   
'You sure don't want Hvitserk his company on your boat?' He asked with a little grinn that brought a smile on her lips. Her eyes looked for Hvitserk, who sat crouched besides Ivar arguing about something.   
'With all those woman on board? You want him to be distracted?'   
'He has only eyes for you Torhild, besides, he will be distracted if you fight with us.' Ubbe responsed. Torhild didn't know what she had to thought about that. She looked over to the two boys and tried to overthink it. Ubbe was right, not only Hvitserk would be concerned about her safity, Ivar to. 'Keep an eye on Ivar, last time we were in Engeland he killed his brother,' Ubbe fell silenced, his eyes glaring towards his brothers. 'It can't happen again.'   
'I will keep an eye on him.' Torhild nodded. Ubbe looked at her and smiled thankful before his eyes met the woman he loved and Torhild slowly walked away.

'Be safe the both of you. I will pray to the gods to give you a save passage, journey and return.' Lagertha had her hands on both Torhild and Björn cheek. 'Keep your sister safe.' She said to Björn. Torhild looked aside to her brother who nodded strongly.   
'We will conquer mother.' He assurer her. Lagertha give him a ferm pat on the chest before she turned to Torhild.   
'You are the princess of the great heathen army now, be strong, be confident, be letal and you will overcome.' Her voice was a little unsteady and Torhild let her arms ambrace her mother.   
'Be fierce mother, even if you can't come, Kattegat needs the queen to grow.' She whispered. Lagertha stroke her hand over Torhild her long brown hair before she pulled back.   
'You are just back and already I have to give you away again. Keep an eye on your brother.' Lagertha said with a look towards Björn.   
'I keep an eye on all of them.' Torhild smiled. Her mother stroke her cheek a last time before Torhild walked to her brother and the other sons of Ragnar.   
'Ready love?' Hvitserk laughed. Torhild felt Ivar his eyes burning in her body, the jealousy already causing trouble and they weren't in Engeland yet.   
'If you call me one more time love, I chop your head off.' She winked. Björn and Ubbe laughed and Torhild turned around, giving Ivar a reassuring glance before jumping on her boat.

Being on the water wasn't the first time, being on the sea ... yes it was. Half the time she gazed over the blue ocean and caught herself on it to compare it with Ivar his deep bleu eyes. The sea was magnificent and for days there wasn't more than only bleu for as far she could see. The other shieldmaidens hadn't been on see either so everybody was pretty excited about it. Torhild sat against the egde, looking to the boat of her brother and the others while she was polishing her axe. Ivar hang over the edge, his head resting on it while his blue eyes gazed over the ocean. He found her glance and a little corned of his mouth found their way up. It wasn't a loving grinn, it was a grinn full of promises and spite. Torhild looked away from him to the darkened sky.

In nothing more than an hour the sea grew wilder, the wind caught the sails causing the ships to drift apart in the little storm there was. Torhild tried to held her eyes on the other ships but the unsteady waves in the night prevented every sight of her brother or the other ships. It wasn't a dangerous situation, with daylight they wouldn't have a problem keeping together. But the wind, the night, the waves caused the ships to break apart in the storm. 'What should we do?' Asked Ase. Torhild looked over her shoulder and gazed over the sea again.   
'There is nothing we can do, we navigate like Björn told uss to do in the hope to find land, or at least find them back.' Yelles Torhild over the wind back. Non of the shieldmaidens were afraid but they all thought the same thing, they had no clue about Engeland and they were all alone now.   
'Maybe when the sun comes up we find them back.' Suggested some of the other shieldmaidens. Maybe ... Torhild kept looking in the dark when the thunder brought the rain and they were totaly lost for now.   
'If this is Thor's will so be it, we survive.' Called Torhild out. They would survive, offcourse they would. So the hours in the storm they spended pulling all their force in keeping the boat in check.

'Why would the gods do this to us?' Ase asked. Torhild looked away from the sea to her friend aside her.   
'To test uss.' She answered quitetly. The sun came up several hours ago and aside the fact that they all survived ... no other boat was to be found. A clear ocean, no Björn, nobody to be found except for the land they were sailing towards. Torhild didn't showed the concern in front of the others but it was there. What if the others didn't make it? What if Björn was dead, or Hvitserk, or Ivar. He couldn't swim, what if he drowed like he almost did when he went with his father? She should take Ubbe's offer to take Hvitserk with her on the boat, at least he knew the land they were approaching, at least, if it was Engeland. 'We search the coastline for the others.' Pointed Torhild towards the beach.   
'I don't know if that will be possible.'   
'Why not?' But when Torhild asked the question, she saw. She saw a small group of riders galloping over the beach. It wasn't that they could hide or something.   
'Fight?' Asked one of the woman. Torhild looked at the riders who had noticed their boa tand get of their horses. They had crossbows, swords, the good stuff.   
'Will they kill us?'   
'If we fight?' Torhild felt silent and nodded slowly. 'I think so.' She murmured.   
'So we just surrender?'   
'For now yes, we have to know were we are and how to escape. Maybe Björn and the others come looking for uss.' Torhild said. The boat hitted the sand and the men in front of the boat raised their crossbows.   
'Get out.' One of them gestured towards the beach. Torhild looked aside to Ase.   
'It would be handy if we knew what he just said.' She whispered.   
'They are Vikings, capture them.' The men commanded the other soldiers. They approached the boat, lowered their crossbows to get in.   
'Now is a good time to attack.' She decided. She grabbed her axe and trew it to the one men who still stood on the beach while the fight broke lose. She wasn't hardly here and already in trouble now. There wasn't a point to keep one alive, they couldn't understand him so they killed them all, swiftly and without any trouble. Torhild jumped out the boat, her face covered in blood while walking over to her axe that stick in the body of the dead men on the beach. She crouched beside him and looked at the seal on his clothes.   
'Someone else!' Yelles Ase from the boat. Torhild pulled her axe loose and turned towards the horse that galloped over the beach towards them. One rider? She clenched her fingers around her axe, ready to attack until she saw who it was. She exhailed relieved when Ivar in his chariot approached. Torhild looked up at him when he stood still, his eyes gazed over the dead bodies.  
'Already having fun?' He asked with a glare towards the dead men.   
'I really wanna kiss you right now, I thought we lost you all.' Torhild said honestly. Ivar tilted his head, leaning on the egde of his chariot with crossed armes and a cocky smile.   
'Why don't you?' He teased her. Torhild slapped him against the shoulder and looked over to the other shieldmaidens.   
'Would be a story for my mother, kissing the only man who I don't have permission for kissing.' She explaind herself. Ivar rolled his eyes and sat right again.   
'You're glad to see me.' He suggested, still going further on the kissing part.   
'I am glad to see you Ivar.'   
'Me to, you gave me quite the hart attack getting away like that.' He nodded towards the sea, like it was her fault that they were driffed apart. 'And I can't believe you already killed more people than me.' He got furhter with a stubborn look towards the dead soldiers. Torhild pointed the others in the correct direction before she turned to Ivar again.   
'I won't leave your side again.' She promissed. He looked at her and shook his head a little relieved she was alright.   
'The gods are testing you Torhild, don't test me.' He warned her. She didn't took it as a threat, she knew it wasn't one. It was just his way to say that she should stay close and listen and after what just happened, it was maybe not that bad an idea ...


	11. // 10 //

They weren't the only ones who drifted apart in the storm. While they where walking aside the coastline Torhild could find other boats crashed down in the sand. 'Did we lost people?' Torhild asked while standing still beside a boatwreck. Some of the other shieldmaidens had caught some of the horses from the soldiers and drove in front while the others walked on foot.   
'We're still searching.'   
'You're priority was me?' She asked with a little teasing smile. Ivar gave her a rather gentle look before his face turned cold again. He hadn't much compassion, she knew he probarbly was worried but he didn't treated her differently and that was something she appreciated. She was supriced that Hvitserk wasn't here claiming her. Torhild walked further besides his chariot while looking for possible signs of life or a camp when she saw the arrow flew right in the back of one of the girls. Torhild jerked her head around, her eyes widened when she saw a group of new soldiers.   
'Get in.' Ivar commanded her.   
'I'm not leaving them alone.' She pointed to the others girls. They were all trained to fight, none of them looked scared, all facing their enemy.   
'By all the gods, Torhild get in!' Ivar yelled. Torhild drew her axe and gave him a stubborn look while dodging a arrow that flew right past her. 'Camp is at the trees, get reinforcement!' Ivar said to one of the shieldmaidens who had a horse. She looked at Torhild who nodded before she galloped away. What was it with those soldiers to attact so random, without having the propper information, without any strategy. Torhild followed the axe throught the air, smaching one of the riders from his horse. She looked aside to Ivar who had that impulsive stare in his eye, that enjoyment around his lips. The soldiers approached fast and there was no time to look over some strategics for herself. A shield wall would have helped, accepted there where riders among them and the shieldmaidens where with to little to make it work. 

The adrenalin hit her like the wave right beside her when the first soldier ran towards her. She turned her axe around her wrist and smiled a little, glad to have so much action on one day. It was easy to kill a man, whole her life was build around it. So when she slayed the man through his stomach she felt nothing. Her eyes just went looking for the next. They were with a small group, twenty maybe, had to be an easy task right? Torhild stepped back to defend an attact, her feet got caught in some seaweed that came with the waves. That little bit of distraction gave her opponent enough to put her out of balance. Torhild fell on her back, in the water, she gasped for some air before the man pushed her head under water, his body sitting on hers so she couldn't move again. She kicked her legs underneath him, looking for a way to free her hands while the air in her longs slowly reduced. She didn't heared much execpt of the growling nature around her. And just when she thought this was her first and last raid she felt the weight from the soldier jerking of her body. She pushed her head above water and took in a deep breath. Hvitserk cut the soldiers throat over and turned back to Torhild. 'Torhild?' He asked concerned. She grabbed his arm and he pulled her right again, she felt dizzy and he noticed. 'Take it easy love.' He said, stroking a strand of hair out of her face. The shortage of oxygen had maked her haid a little blurry. She tried to concentrate but everything looked kind of weird.   
'Is she alright?' Björn yelled. Torhild tried to find her brother but everything was a mess of fighting, shields, axes and swords. She saw colors running before her and the dizziness she had became worse.   
'She was to long under.'   
'Get her out of here.' Reacted Björn harshly. The sounds of battle surrounded her and Hvitserk caught one of the horse, he pulled her after him in the saddle before he galloped away. Torhild wrapped her arms around him and tried to focus on the road they were taking, but everything went kind of blurry again.

When she opened her eyes she looked at the bright mix of shades of green in the trees. Her eyes travelled over the crowns from the trees before she went looking for something more familiar. She pushed herself up on her elbows and couched, her throat felt soar a little, what meaned she had swallowed water in. 'Rise and shine.' Her eyes looked for the voice. Hvitserk sait against a tree, eating an apple with his knife.   
'How long was I out?' Torhild asked. She runned her hand through her wet hair, looked down over her wet body.   
'Not that long.' He pushed his body up and walked over to her, squated besides her. 'How do you feel?'   
'Not dead enough for you to be concerned.' She smiled softly. That was the difference between him and Ivar. Ivar would already had commanded her to do something other than resting, Hvitserk cared enough to go easy on her. And she didn't knew what was better in this moment, but despite that, Ivar wasn't here. Hvitserk smiled because of her words, he cut a piece of his apple and handed it over.   
'A little gratitude for the man who saved your life.' He replied softly, with a bit of humor in his voice that made her laugh a little.   
'My hero, what is it that you want as a reward?'   
'You know what I want Torhild.' He grinned. She stroke her hand over his cheek and pressed a kiss on his lips. When she pulled back his eyes already had their loving brightness back, she could pluck the desire right out it. She bited from the apple and looked around in the forest. She saw some of the men walking but not enough.   
'Where is the rest?' She asked, looking back at him. He looked around while standing up, giving her a hand but she ignored it and got up herself. He liked that about her, that little spark of misschief and self-will.   
'Exploring, looking for more soldiers. Ubbe is already on his way to the sentlement with a part of the men, we are treating the wounded before we follow.'   
'Oh that is what you do, treating the wounded.' She said with a promising look. He laughed and shook his head while guiding her between the trees. When they both came on the edge of the woods her eyes met those from Ase.   
'Glad to see you up.' She smiled. Torhild nodded and stood still besides the woman.   
'How bad?' She asked carefull. Even from here she could see an amont of dead bodies.   
'There was a third group. We lost fifteen men and a couple of wounded.' Ase answered. Torhild looked at the riders, noticing her brother among them. There was one good thing on this whole attack, they had horses now. They approached and Torhild looked up to her brother.   
'Are you challenging the gods sister?' He asked with a grin.   
'I think they are challenging me.' She responded right after. He nodded and turned towards Ase. 'Get the wounded ready, the road is clear, we are heading for the settlement.' He ordered. Ase nodded and walked the forrest in, Björn turned his eyes back to Torhild.   
'I'm fine.' She protested against his thorough gaze over her body.   
'Stay with Hvitserk.' He said before looking at his half brother. 'Keep her safe.' He warned him.   
'I can take care of myself.'   
'Saw that.' Björn nodded towards the sea, remembering her what went wrong. Torhild murmured something while she looked her brother canter away. Frustrated by the fact that Björn already putted her aside or under protection she walked back the forest in.   
'Don't get mad love.'   
'Don't Hvitserk.' She pointed her finger towards him. He wrapped his arm around her waist and pulled her against his body. She felt the heat of his warm body through her wet clothes and relaxed a little.   
'Let me protect you.' He whispered, pressing a kiss against her hair. She took his smell in with a deep breath before she looked up to him.   
'For now, until we are in the settlement.' She nodded. He cupped her chin with his fingers and gave her a loving smile.   
'Offcourse love.'   
'Don't call me love.' She protested while pulling his lips closer.   
'My lady?'   
'No.'   
'Princess?' He asked with a grinn before kissing here. Hvitserk, he got her every time were he wanted her and she didn't mind, that was her weakness and she had just two, him ... and Ivar.


	12. // 11 //

The settlement was a little differently than she imagined. They road a long trail on fields with crops and seeds before they came in the settlement, a large village, they even had a great hall? 'Do we have or own great hall here?' Torhild asked aloud. The group stopped the horses in what looked like stabble and everone immidiatly started to carry the wounded away.   
'They builded fast in the time we were away.' Björn smiled approvingly. He walked away and left his sister again, with Hvitserk, not that he was complaining.   
'He forgot I don't know this place.' She murmuled. In the time they got from the beach to here it was already dark, she felt the cold slip through her still wet clothes and shivered.   
'Come on, I get you to a place to eat and sleep.' Hvitserk pointed towards one of the little cabins. It was so different here. She thought she would used to be on new places, in the two year away she did nothing other than that. But this ... she had to get used to the idea she was in Engeland now. Acually she wanted to find Ivar, just to be sure he was alright but Hvitserk looked so happy today, guiding her around through the village that she didn't want to ruin his little moment of fame.   
'I can't believe I wasn't a part of this.' She trew her hands in the air while gazing through the darkness. It was silent, although there were a lot of people out to greet Björn, where they both were walking there was nothing other than the soft wind. Hvitserk stopped before a little cabin and Torhild gave him a short look. 'Do I have a cabin for my own?' She asked confused. Hvitserk grinned and shook his head.   
'It's mine and since I don't now where you have to stay you have to stay with me.' He pulled her inside and she started laughing.  
'Don't we have to be celebrating, or a least greet the others.'   
'They won't miss us, your wounded, you need to rest.' He putted her protest to rest. She tilted her head and looked at him, he wetted his lips and it was a gesture she couldn't ingnore. She wasn't wounded but she was tired and greeting King Harald like this wasn't the best idea so maybe Hvitserk was right.   
'Sleeping.' She warned him. He smiled his attractive smile and maked a little bow. Everything for his princess right?

The morningsun bruched her cheek, a tingle heat spreading over her face waking her up. She narrowed her eyes against the brightness and turned her head meeting the curves of Hvitserk naked chest. His breathing was steady, slow, he was still sleeping. She pushed herself up on her elbows and looked to his face. Until she heard something smaching against the door, Hvitserk was awake within seconds. He groaned and turned his body to his side, ingoring whatever was outside waiting for him. 'You'll never be a good leader if you can't get up.' She smiled. She placed a kiss on his lower ribs, looking at him with some amusement.   
'I'm not leadersmaterial.' He yawned.   
'If you marry a princess you have to be.'   
'What are you suggesting with that?' He was fully awake with those words, pushing his body up so he had a better look at her.   
'That it is nice.' Torhild replied. Hvitserk laid his hand on the back of her neck and pulled her closer, pressing his lips against hers in a way she couldn't ingnore. But then their was that smaching again and she pulled back, looking at those comsuming eyes she loved. 'We have to go. Your have a bad influence on me.' She whispered. He smiled and tilted his head a little, enjoying those words while enjoying his vieuw of Torhild getting dressed.

Torhild walked out only to see Ivar in his chariot before the door. 'I thought I would find you here, with him.' Ivar pointed towards his brother. Torhild looked up to Ivar and almost immidiatly recognizing his bad mood.   
'Nothing wrong with that.' Hvitserk teased. Torhild gave him a sharp look. She knew when to stop taunting Ivar, his brothers did not.   
'Get in.' Ivar commanded her, staring at his brother in envy. Torhild jumped on the chariot and Ivar clicked his tongue, his horse immidiatly reacting. They road in silent for a few moments, how further away from Hvitserk Ivar came, who more relaxed he became.   
'Ivar.' Torhild laid her hand on his shoulder but he pulled away.   
'Don't.' He warned her.   
'Talk to me.' She instisted. Ivar pulled on the reins causing his horse to absurd to stop. He turned his head and looked at her, his bleu eyes almost changing colors like the ocean under a storm.  
'Do you know what Hvitserk did when you were away for two years?' He asked. Torhild looked away, over the people who where working on the fields, or stand outside their houses, washing their clothes. Some of them looked up to Ivar, asking with their eyes what he was doing in the middle of the road.   
'Nothing you approve of I guess.' She murmuled.   
'No, if he respected you like he always said he does than he wouldn't have another woman every three weeks.' He histed. It was troubling him and that was something she was sensitive about. 'Do you really concider marrying him?'   
'No.' She answered right away. 'I love your brother but it's nothing serious.'   
'He thinks it is.'   
'Well, Hvitserk has still a lot to learn.' She smiled. Ivar looked at her an nodded slowly. He crossed his arms on the backing of his seat and laid his head on them.   
'Your to distracted Torhild. It will get both of you killed.' He concluded. Torhild slowly laid her hand back on his shoulder, giving him a gentle squeeze.   
'It's not easy to resist Hvitserk.'   
'Than focus your attention to somewhere else.' Ivar replied. He sat up again and clicked his tongue. The sudden departure of his horse brought Torhild for a short moment out of balance. But Ivar, as always was right, Hvitserk was a distraction for her, one that could get her killed.  
'Good, I will stay away from Hvitserk if that's what you want.' She confirmed. Ivar looked at her, rather impressed.   
'Really, is that all that I need to say?' He asked. Torhild shrugged and leaned on the side of his chariot while she looked at the people and houses they passed.   
'I always listen to you.' Since when he became so mature?  
'That's not true.' He smiled a little, exacly like she wanted him to be. 'And it's not what I want, it's what keeps you safe.' He said not far after. Torhild turned her head and looked at him, he was smiling in confident, in his usual amusent way, almost spotting. She shook her head and looked back to the surroundings.

The great hall wasn't bigger then in Kattegat but sure it hadn't stole his name. Ivar always leaved a certain impression with people, mostly fear. So when he crawled in that great hall all the conversations stopped. Last time he was here he killed his brother, now she walk besides him and kinda felt more confident than ever. And that leaved also an impression. Her brother stood after a table, beside Ubbe and even Hvitserk was there already. But her eyes met one in pecticular, those of king Harald. His eyes gazed over her body, with a certain amount of eager, lust. His brother Halfdan wasn't much better. 'You maybe remember my sister, Torhild.' Björn introduced her to the men who had stayed here.   
'Hard to forget.' King Harald grinned. Torhild didn't smiled, as the only woman she had to be strong. She walked over to her brother, standing beside him.   
'How is your mother doing?' One of the other men said. The corner of Torhild her lips trilled a little, pulling up while she looked at King Harald.   
'Queen Lagertha is fine. In fact,'   
'Torhild.' Interupted Björn her.   
'Let her speak.' Ivar said half grinning. Torhild nodded slowly before going further.   
'I have a message from queen Lagertha for you king Harald.' She announced. Halfdan looked aside to his brother when king Harald just stayed chill under all the eyes who were laid on him.  
'What may that be?' He asked almost polite.   
'The next time you want to take over her village, don't send a bastard son of an earl, do it yourself. And for that matter mother gave me the duty to punnish you for that.' She explained codly. King Harald just stared at her, slowly nodding, the tension almost to feel in the air.   
'What punishment may that be?' Halfdan asked instead of his brother.   
'Not decided yet.' Torhild answered while looking to the one person who would love to help her punish a king like Harald ... Ivar.


	13. // 12 //

The corner of her mouth lifted a little when she parried the sword of Ubbe. He tilted his head, also smiling, pulled back and attacked again. Torhild backed away, concentrated on the fight that everything around her just faded away. While everybody was settling in and making raiding plans Torhild used the spare time to train, keeping her body in shape. She did what Ivar suggested, she kept her focus on the importance of the journey here. She couldn't get home with the story that she failed because of her distraction towards Hvitserk. So it was all about focus, temping the boys into fights, training the shieldmaidens. 'Come on Torhild.' Ubbe challenged her. Torhild had a weak for fighting with one weapon, she was used to a sword and axe. She pushed him back a little, used her slim body in the advantage, ducking underneath his attack and hitting him in the back. Ubbe laughed and turned around to her. 'Do you have an idea what you gonna do with king Harald?' He asked. Torhild lowered her sword and shrugged.  
'Punishment.' She answered.   
'Björn doesn't want you to. You don't have to, Lagertha wouldn't find out, she isn't here.' Ubbe began. Torhild narrowed her eyes, looking aside to Ase, Ivar and Hvitserk who sat in the grass against a tree. Hvitserk looked at her like he always does, with admiration. But none of them reacted on what Ubbe said so she turned her head back to him.   
'Why are you saying this?' She asked, confused.   
'I'm just saying that king Harald proved his loyalty here, he is of use to us.' The fight was over, Ubbe putted his sword back in his belt.   
'Yes, but he attacted Kattegat, my mother, after our backs. That deserves punishment.'   
'So is killing my mother.' Ivar reacted. Torhild clenshed her teeth and looked at Ivar who give her a warning look.   
'So is killing your brother.' Hvitserk followed. Ase jumped up to get out of reach from Ivar who turned to his brother, angry.   
'Don't test my limits brother.' Ivar warned him. Torhild looked between the two of them, sighed.  
'What your mother did is unforgivable, but we didn't punish her for it.'   
'I want to.' Ivar murmured after the words of Ubbe. It would keep a distance between her and Ivar, Lagertha killing his mother, she didn't blame him but she couldn't choise sides either.   
'Why don't you?' Ase asked. Ivar turned his eyes away from Torhild and looked at Ase.   
'Do I look like I gave up?' He asked grinning.   
'So you don't think I should punish king Harald?' Torhild changed the subject back to Harald before somebody trew an axe or something.   
'No.' Ubbe answered honest. Torhild knew that her brother didn't wanted it to so she looked towards Hvitserk, for his opinion.   
'I don't know Torhild, I think it's not your place to punish him, it's Lagertha's.' He said after a little moment of thinking. That wasn't really a yes or no answer but she understood what he was saying.   
'Ase?'   
'I have an opinion in that?' She asked supriced.   
'Everybody does, you are as equal as us.' Torhild smiled. Ase was kind of the right hand withing the shieldmaidens, Torhild valued her opinion as much as she did from the others.   
'Whatever you decide is good for me.'   
'That wasn't usefull at all.' Ubbe grinned. Torhild looked towards Ivar who looked back with an unpredictable gaze.   
'Don't need to ask you.'   
'Why not?' He tilted his head and Torhild smiled softly.   
'Because you want to see everyone punished.' She shrugged. Ivar nodded, pulling his knife out the ground and looking at it while he turns it around in his hand.   
'Punish him Torhild, let me have some fun.' He smiled devilish. Torhild looked aside to Ubbe who shook his head. But Ubbe was right, it wasn't her place, she wasn't there when it happened and fairly she hadn't a say in it.   
'You're right, I deliver him to my mother when we go back home. If he survives.' She nodded.  
'Thanks for taking us advise princess.'   
'I'm not the princess.' She protested. Ubbe laughed and walked over to the ale who stood before the brothers on the ground, Ivar smached his foot against it so the ale dripped in the ground before Ubbe had a change to save it.   
'Why are you made?' Ubbe asked him.   
'It's always the same with you.' Ivar spitted on the ground. Torhild looked how he crawled away before she looked to the two brothers again.   
'We need to go raid before he is going to kill someone else of us again.' Ubbe said.   
'Do I need to talk with him?' Torhild asked. Ubbe shook his head, emptied the little bit that was still in the cup.   
'Brother can take care of himself.' Hvitserk agreed. Torhild looked to the place where Ivar was vanished before looking aside to Ase. '  
Then I go bring some good news to my brother and king Harald.' She announed.   
'Be carefull Torhild.' Ubbe nodded. She bow short and walked a way from the trainingsfield.

They first raiding would set the next day and like always that was a reason to feast. Torhild stood besides her brother and looked over the great hall. 'I'm taking your advice.' She began. Björn turned his head, looking down on her.   
'Wich one?' He teased. She give him a little hit between his ribs with her elbow and pointed towards king Harald. She doesn't like the man, he was looking to much, wanted to know everything. If she had to choise between those two brothers it would be Halfdan, he was more ... reliable.   
'I'm not gonna punish him, it's mothers task and I'm not interfering with her business.' She explained. Björn nodded, giving her some more ale.   
'You learn quickly sister.' He praised her. She bow and walked away, right for those two brothers. Halfdan spotted her immidiatly, giving his brother a smack against the chest and nodding towards Torhild.   
'King Harald, Halfdan.' She bow for the both of them.   
'Princess.' King Harald smiled. She hated the word princess, it was already bad enough that Hvitserk called her love.   
'Did you decide the punishment for my brother?' Halfdan asked. Torhild smiled a little, looked away from Harald towards his brother while nodding.   
'Not.' She answered. King Harald frowned his eyesbrows, not sure what to think about it. 'It's not my place. But if you survive this than I will take you home to deliver you to my mother.' She explained herself. The both brothers exchanged looks with each other.   
'Your not so bad after all.' Halfdan grinned, looking of her body. Torhild held her cup with ale up.  
'I hope you survive this king Harald.' She said with a promising look. He chuckled and smached his cup against hers.   
'Keep safe Torhild.' Halfdan said.   
'You to.' She bow and walked away. Now they were here she better kept those two close. Ivar sat again the wall, drinking from his ale without looking away from her. 'I feel your eyes burning in my back from across the room.' She said while sitting besides him.   
'You shouldn't do it Torhild, he deserves it.' Ivar reacted. He sounded still frustrated. Her eyes felt back on king Harald, he was still looking at her. The fact she sat besides Ivar wasn't much of a reassurance for them.   
'He will get his part.' She said softly. They felt in silence, Torhild stared at the people, changed looks with her brother. He didn't mind the contact she had with Ivar but she knew he held a close eye on the youngest brother of Ragnar. 'Tomorrow we raid.' She whispered in her own thoughts. Ivar looked aside, she looked back, staring at the confident smile on his lips. 'Are you going to kill my mother?' She finally asked. His smile disappeared and he looked away from her.  
'I'm not so generous as you are but,' he felt silent and shook slowly his head. 'care to much about you to do sush thing I guess.' He murmuled. Torhild looked to her empty cup, thinking about what he just said.   
'What do you want me to do tomorrow?' She asked, looking back at him. His bleu eyes capture hers and the stared at each other for several moments.   
'Don't die.' He finally answered. She nodded and looked back in front of her.   
'You neither Ivar.' She whispered. She didn't got emotional over the moment but it hits her like a wave, the friendship she had with Ivar, what it would meant when he should die. She looked aside to him, studied his face and nodded slowly for herself. She couldn't be distracted, she had to keep him alive for she was sure he would do the same for her.


	14. // 13 //

Torhild took her axe that rested against the wood and walked after Ase. They where with twenty shieldmaidens and all of them were heavily armed with hair in long braids over their shoulders. Most of them carried a bleu shield, de colors from her mothers. Torhild felt ready for her first raid, despite that she was tensed. She knew she couldn't fail, not for herself, not for her mother or brother. But with Ase by her side who had been there for two years and longer it felt like a comfort, they had each others backs. The group walked over to where Björn was assembling the men ... and they were the only group of girls and woman. Eyes pierced through her and she felt the responsibility getting heavier every second they stared. Everybody wanted to see what became of the daughter from Lagertha and it was a heavy burden if she had Björn Ironside as an example. But the confident of the others girls gave her a little strenght enough to let the uncertainty vanish from her face. King Harald and Halfdan looked at her with a slight grin, probably asking themselves if she would make it. The others girls stayed with the men while Torhild and Ase walked over to her brother and the other leaders. She stood still besides the chariot of Ivar. 'You seem ready?' He said softly. She looked up to him, her eyes reflexting her tension. Ivar crossed his arms over the edge of the chariot, his head resting aside hers.   
'The fact there where soldiers on the beach meant that they were watching us. They will be suspecting an attack and will be ready for it.' Björn began. Torhild turned her head and looked at her brother.   
'What is our plan of attack?' Halfdan asked.   
'It isn't heavily secured but it is a big village with four entry points. We split up in four, attacking each side of those gates.' Her brother explained. Torhild had heared the stories about the big heathen army and so she looked aside to Ivar, his face hardly inches removed from hers. He had maked the plan then, she was curious if he would interfere with the plans now from her brother. She piled his reaction on this, he nodded, not looking back.   
'Did you got a person on the inside?' He asked Björn. Everybody looked at Ivar, like he was selling some fish or something. 'They could get reinforcements, we're going in blind.' He followed. He had a point. Normaly raiding would involve killing people and steeling but with the soldiers the encountered before his idea wasn't that bad. Why should you send your men to the beach if you could use them in the defenses?   
'King Harald,'   
'Me and my man take one gate.' Harald nodded. They ignored Ivar and she looked aside to him, to the anger running through his eyes. He clenshed his jaws, controlling his breath without going in to it. Torhild looked at Harald turning towards his brother who immidiatly turned to his men. They were all so organized, changing looks without changing words.   
'Ubbe.' Pointed Björn towards the nord. 'Hvitserk and Ivar take the west, me and Torhild take the east.' Björn ended while looking at his sister, she nodded. Hvitserk changed looks with Ivar who grinned only on his own sarcastic way. Everybody got back to his men, Torhild pushed her body away from the chariot but Ivar pulled her softly back. She turned around looking at his fierce bleu eyes.   
'Be careful, we don't know what we are walking in to. I need you alive.' He whispered pulling her closer than necessary. She studies his face and smiled a little.   
'Don't get all soft on me Ivar.'   
'I'm serious Torhild.' He reacted. She gave him a reassuring look and backed away.   
'Be safe Ivar, we see each other on the raid.' She bowed a little and walked with Ase back to the girls.   
'Be safe love!' She heared Hvitserk yell from on the other side of the square, knowing no shame. Torhild putted here axe in the air, waving towards him. Her brother had the biggest group, he turned to his sister being all practical.   
'You seem ready.'   
'By all the gods, why is everbody keep asking me that.' She rolled her eyes.   
'You need to be sister.' He said straight on. She turned to him, looking up with onfident dark eyes.   
'I am.'   
'Than let's go raiding.' He said with a smug smile. He motioned his people in the right direction and everybody started walking.

The village was quite big and they hadn't any form of cover on the way to it. 'Shield wall!' Yelled Bjôrn. Torhild putted her shield up, keeping it in front of her, a long rank of colorfull shields ready to take some attacks. But when they moved closer there was nothing of an attack. Torhild looked through a slit towards the big wooden gate ... but nothing. She thought of what Ivar had said ... what if they got reinforcements? But there was no turning back from it, she wouldn't convince Björn and aside that, the others where on the other gates. Björn putted his fist up and everybody stopped walking. Torhild looked at the gate, it didn't look like it was strengthened. She looked aside to her brother who looked at her, asking himself the same question.   
'One way to find out.' She shrugged. Björn lowered his shield, walking to the gate and pushing his hands against it. It swung open, he pulled his shield up right away in case of an attack but nothing happened.   
'Be alert, search the place.' He commanded. Torhild nodded towards her shieldmaidens and they all walked in. She clutched her fingers around her axe, focused for what might come. Torhild walked besides some traiding stations, she held her hand over some coal.   
'It's still hot.' She noticed, turning towards Ase who squatted beside a bowl of water.   
'Also hot.' She nodded. Torhild turned around looking for Björn when she saw how the gates felt shut.   
'It's a trap!' She yelled. Soldiers came from everywere, surrounding them all. Torhild and the others maked a circle, facing those soldiers.   
'May the gods be with us.' Ase said.   
'Attack!' And they attacked. Torhild smached her shield against a soldier, killing him by the blow before she dropped it and pulled her sword. She focused from the one soldier to the other without asking questions of the number of soldiers there were. Killing became quite easy when her own life was on the line. The soldiers drove them to the center, she saw Halfdan fight, even Ubbe. She slit a soldier through his stomach, turning to the next but he smached his shield against her head. She gasped, air pressing out her lungs when she felt with her back against the ground. Blood running from her nose and headwound, a little dizzy for several seconds. But then she saw the soldier came closer, she reached fort he knife in her belt, ready to use him when a white horse ran by, not seconds later the soldier dropped dead on the ground. Torhild rolled on her stomach, pushed her body up and grabbed her axe from the ground. Her eyes found those of Ivar, still with her knife in one hand she directed to one of the soldiers who wanted to attack him from behind. She trew the knife, hitting the soldier right in the chest without a change to kill Ivar. Ivar looked over his shoulder and then right back to her, she forced a smile on her lips before killing another soldier. She was out of breath and tired like hell. This were to much soldiers, they were more prepared than they all thought.   
'Torhild!!' Torhild turned around, looking for her brother. 'Get out of here!' He commanded. She looked for Ase but wasn't nowhere to be found.   
'I'm staying, I will fight beside you brother.' She yelled back, fighting of another soldier. But her movements got weaker, the blow to her head maked it harder to concentrate.   
'Ivar, get her back to the settlement, assemble the other men and prepare for defenses for when they attack the settlement.' Björn fought his way to Torhild, grabbing her with her arm and pulling her towards Ivar his chariot. 'You are young, you will learn, go protect the settlement.' He said with a concerned voice. Torhild cursed and jumped on the chariot from Ivar. He spanked his reigns against the horse and it started to gallop through the fight. She saw some of her shieldmaidens ... lying, dead eyes staring back. She felt her stomach turned by the sight of it. Someone had mangeged to get the gate open and they galloped right throug it. How could this happened? Ivar looked over his shoulder towards her.   
'I'm fine.' She answered his look.   
'No you're not.' He reacted right away. She started trilling, shaking her head with his words. She saw the dead bodies of her friends, the blood, the way she had attacted those soldiers. 'Torhild.' She startled out of her thoughts, looking at Ivar again. 'You did good.' Did she?


	15. // 14 //

Ivar his horse galloped over the road like a wild beast, sweat dripping from his body, flanks moving heavy pulling in breath. Being a horse from Ivar wasn't exacly a present, that animal worked harder than some people did. Torhild stroke her hand under her nose that still was bleeding, her head heavy and blurry because of the headwound. He noticed her silence, the way she narrowed her eyes to find focus on the road. He pulled on the reins and the animal came back in a steady canter before he stopped. 'Why are we stopping, we have to warn the settlement!' She pointed towards the road.   
'You dropping dead wouldn't help Torhild, let me look.'   
'No, Ivar, keep going. I'm fine.' She itterupted him. He gave her his impatient look and she sighed, moving a little so she stood before him. She pushed her fingers against her nose again and looked at the blood on it.   
'The bleeding will stop. I'm more concerned about your headwound.' He let his bleu eyes inspecting the deep wound on her forehead. Torhild shrank a little when he touched his finger aside it. 'Dizzy?'   
'Little.' She nodded slowly while looking in his eyes. He stared at her, his fingers stroking away from her head , caressing her cheek.   
'What are the gods planning with you Torhild?' He asked himself. She shrugged, smiling a little towards him.   
'Only the gods know that. We should go Ivar.' She laid her hand over his that still laid on her cheek.   
'Just promise me,' but before he could go further with his words a noice jerked their eyes away from each other. Torhild saw some riders, their banners clearly showing that it were soldiers from a kingdom.   
'Go!' She whispered. Ivar slammed his reins and his horse reacted immidiatly, startled by the sudden wip. But it didn't take long of those caught up with them. They forced Ivar to stop his horse before they surrounded them. Torhild changed looks with Ivar who grabbed in reflex his axe and threw it to the first rider, hitting him right of his horse. Torhild felt the tip of a spear against her throat, just as Ivar.   
'Ivar the Boneless, we have someone who will really glad to see you.' One of the men grinned. They looked at Torhild, gazing over her body while they figured out who she was.   
'You will give the settlement a message, this isn't longer their poperty, all who resist against our men will be killed.' They said to her.   
'Let him go.' Torhild demanded.   
'Torhild leave it.' Ivar hissed with clenshed teeth.   
'I'm more valuable, I'm the princess of the heathen army, much more leverage if you take me.' She explained. She hated to use the word princess but in this case it could help her get Ivar safe and sound back in the settlement. If someone could get her out than it was Ivar. His eyes turned stonecold with her words but he didn't say anything. They both just watched to the soldiers who exchanged looks.   
'Take her.' One nodded.   
'No!' Ivar gripped Torhild by her elbow, hard enough that it hurted her.   
'You know what we said, surrender the settlement and you get her maybe back.' One of them pointed towards Torhild. Torhild jerked her head around and looked at Ivar. She laid her hand against his cheek.   
'If someone can safe me it's you. Think with your head and not with your heart and emotions.' She pointed against his head.   
'I hate you.' He murmuled, angry because he knew he couldn't change her or the soldiers minds again.   
'I love you to.' She replied softly before jumping off the chariot under warning of the soldiers. Torhild got the horse from the dead soldier. She pulled herself in the saddle and looked at Ivar who dropped down his guard so that she had a look in the eyes she loved more than anything in the world.   
'Come back to me.'   
'Always.' She answered softly.   
'Keep you by the rules and maybe you will.' One of the soldiers said. Ivar his eyes turned distant again, he slapped his reins on the horse and it started galloping away. Torhild looked at him leaving before the soldiers pulled her horse after them, forcing her to follow.

Along the road Torhild saw soldiers riding, some of them wounded, among them captive vikings. But they were to far gone to see how they were. One thing was sure, in the time that Björn and the other brothers went home Engeland reinforced themselves for a new attack. The soldiers surrounding her joint the other groups. Her eyes fell on the vikings they had capture, hoping to see a familiar face. 'Torhild?' She turned her body in the saddle looking for the person who called out for her. And than she saw who it was.   
'Ubbe?'   
'You look bad, are you alright? I thought you and Ivar got back to the settlement?' He asked. He walked, restrained after a couple of soldiers.   
'We didn't maked it. Is Björn alright?'   
'Move on girl.' One of the men ordered, pushing a spear in her back. She turned her head and ride faster after the others. It was a good thing, having Ubbe here. She passed a chariot with wounded soldiers and a lot of viking captives. Why they need so much captives? They drove a village in, a big castle in front of them. Before the stables they held still, pulling Torhild out the saddle.   
'Bring that other one.' One ordered. Torhild looked down to the heavy restraines they putted around her wrists before she looked up to the soldiers who brought Ubbe closer. '  
A son of Ragnar and a princess, the king will be pleased.' They announced. Torhild looked at Ubbe who looked over the castle before they were forced to walk.   
'Got Ivar away?' Ubbe asked softly. Torhild looked aside and nodded slowly.   
'We changed places.'   
'Not with his permission I guess.' Ubbe guessed. Torhild gave him a promesing glance before they entered the castle. She never walked in a castle before and she was a little curious about it. Her eyes looked up to the walls, the surrounding, their were paintings, a lot of soldiers marching in and out. The walk ended in a big hall, a little like a great viking hall but than different. In front there was a trown. There stood two childeren aside it, a woman after them and then a man sitting on the trown. He wore a crown and she didn't had to be smart to know that this was the king. 'You have to be kidding me.' Ubbe murmuled. The king smiled a little, satisfied by his catch and the fact that they had won a battle.   
'Welcome!' He said with open arms. Torhild gazed towards Ubbe who spitted on the ground before the king. 'That isnt a way to greet your king Ubbe Ragnarsson.' He grinned. Then his eyes fell on Torhild, looking over her.   
'And who is she?' He asked his soldier.   
'She claims to be the princess of this great heathen army.'   
'And is that true?' The king asked. Torhild putted her chin up, stubborn.   
'Speak when the king asked you a question.' One soldier sneered in her ear.   
'Yes, I'm the sister of the great Björn Ironside, leader of this heathen army.' She answered fearless.   
'So you are a daughter of Ragnar?' He asked cheerfull.   
'Yes.' Ubbe answered in her place. Torhild looked aside, why would he say that?   
'That is even better.' The king smiled.   
'You have no idea what you are doing. You have no idea what my brother will do to you when he finds you.' Ubbe hissed. Yes, Ivar had a certain way of taking revenge. They forced Ubbe on his knees and he groaned.   
'Who are you?' Torhild asked the king. She had missed two years from all the great stories so she had litteraly no idea who that beared men was.   
'I'm your king, king Aethelwulf.' He presented himself. Torhild her face flattend while she looked aside to Ubbe. That person she knew out the stories. 'That settlement was never my fathers to gave away because he wasn't a king anymore.' He had so much joy in telling this, seeing how Ubbe reacted on that. 'Bring them away.' He nodded towards his men. They pushed Torhild away, following with Ubbe. They had litterly no leg to stand on. Their only hope laid with Ivar, Björn and Hvitserk ...


	16. // 15 //

Her head still pounded even after sitting for hours in the dark, locked ... chained. The chains chattered when she brought her hand up, feeling the headwound. 'You need a healer.'   
'I'm fine Ubbe.' She reacted rather coldly. He had repeated himself for hours now, concerned about her health while she was thinking about a way out of here.   
'Did Ivar said anything for the two of you separated?' He asked after a little while. Torhild turned her body out of the corner and looked at him, with a desperate look. 'We are getting out of here Torhild, you know your brother will come for you.' He encouraged her. She smiled sloftly and stared at the little window to the gray sky.   
'King Ecbert played all of you, we have nothing now.'   
'We don't know if it's true.' Ubbe reacted. Torhild nodded and looked back at him. They both were covered in blood, blood of their enemies, Ubbe luckily didn't got badly hurt so his mind and body were sharp enough for the both of them.   
'He wouldn't say it if it wasn't true. Ivar suspected nothing?' She thought at least the youngest and skeptical brother of them would suspect something.   
'Ivar wanted to Blood Eagle Ecbert, no deal, no settlement, just dead. Maybe we should have listened.'   
'You should listen more to your brother. This wouldn't have happened if you listened to Ivar.' She defended the youngest brother. Ivar and the others where in a settlement were they don't had a claim on, or at least, not an official claim.   
'Since Sigurd died he didn't act with the right mind Torhild. Every choice he made leaded to disaster at some point. We couldn't trust him anymore.' Ubbe told her softly. He was with his thought somewere else and Torhild thought of the dead that Ivar caused. Would it have been different if she was there to stop him?   
'He didn't change that much for me.' She murmuled, Ubbe laughed softly.   
'You are amazing with him Torhild. I know your mother doesn't approve of you being with him but in my oppinion you stop a whole lot of bloodshed just to stand right next to him.' His words brought a light blush on her cheeks, lucky because of the darkness he wouldn't notice it. 'He need your counsel more than us.' Ubbe followed. Torhild nodded slowly thinking of the look Ivar gave her just before she had to go with those soldiers. It was a loving look, reassuring her that he would get her out of the mess she caused. But it was better to have Ivar there than in here.  
'Why did you say to that king that I'm a daughter of Ragnar?' She asked.   
'You have a better change of survival. He don't know you, he will pick you as the weak one among us.'   
'I am.' She agreed. She was the youngest, her skills weren't that perfect, her stories never been told.   
'No you're not. It would surprice you Torhild but being with Ivar all the time gives you some advantage.' He smiled amused. She narrowed her eyes, pulling one eyebrow up. 'What I want to say is that you have a lot of potential, think with the right mind and you can be as deviant as my brother.'   
'I'm not really hoping to turn out like your brother.' She smiled in return. Ubbe chuckled and focusted his attention back on the chains, hoping that he could out of them on a way.   
'There is nothing wrong with Ivar,'   
'Oh hush, there is plenty wrong with Ivar.' Torhild intterupted him. Ubbe smiled in thoughts and looked up from the chains.   
'But you love him, more than you love Hvitserk.' He noticed. The smile fadded on her lips while she looked down to the filthy ground.   
'Yes. It's wrong from me to have Hvitserk in a game while he seriously wants to marry me.'  
'You're viking Torhild, he understands that.' Ubbe grinned. But before she could get further on the subject the door cracked open and two soldiers came in followed by king Aethelwulf.   
'We have a feast tonight, I would like to invite you as a guest.' He invited Torhild. She looked slowly aside to Ubbe who sat on the other side of the room.   
'Why?' She asked slowly.   
'To discuss the situation at hand.' Aethelwulf smiled. She saw Ubbe nod in her eyecorner so she nodded to. 'Good, prepare her.' He orded his men.

Torhild had three servants who cared for her, they looked after the wound, cleaned her up and braided her hair in something even her mother couldn't do. It was a way for Torhild to have a look inside this castle. The room she was prepared in was a large bedroom, with a huge mirror in front of her, everything with nice decorations and soft fabrics. They even got her a dress, a black dress without sleeves and golden details on the upper half of it. She looked like a real princess now, with earrings, the dress, the attitude she tried to put in her face expressions. She followed the servants to a great hall were a man stood aside the door. 'Princess Torhild, daughter of the great Ragnar Lothbrok.' He accounced her. The whole hall felt silent and she walked in, head high, her eyes on the king directed. He looked at her before he stood up, smiling, walking over to her and offering his hand. She took it, he guided her towards the table.  
'A princess deserves to be recognized as one.' He said while he took a golden crown and putted on her head.   
'Thank you majesty.' She bow polite. If she had to get her, Ubbe and the others free at least she had to play this game for a while.   
'Can I say, for a fierce vikingwoman this suits you verry well.' He pointed towards her dress before offering her a seat. A servant gave her a cup and she looked at the wine before sitting down.   
'Back home I have a rather big collection in dresses, I'm just to it.' She smiled friendly towards him. She noticed the woman and the two kids again, the one kid a big resembling to Ragnar.  
'That is your half brother. Magnus, come here.' Aethelwulf demanded the kid. The little boy walked over, bowed a little. 'This is Torhild, she is your half sister.' He said to the little boy. Torhild looked at him, smiled a little, thinking about the chestpiece Ivar had showed her short before departure to Engeland.   
'I've heard about you.' She spoke to the boy.   
'But we didn't heard about you princess, how is that?' Aethelwulf asked while he sended the boy away. Torhild looked away from the little man and forced a smile on her lips.   
'Woman aren't always so important as men, I didn't grew up in Kattegat because of my mother living in another town. I left for two years, to become a better warrior so I guess there wasn't much to talk about.' She explained detailed. The more she said about herself, the more he would believe her innocents. In the meantime her eyes gazed over the people, they all looked at her on a weird way, like she wasn't a complete stranger.   
'Your brothers did a lot of damage.'   
'Yes well,' she felt silent and looked at him, with a false grinn on her lips. 'so did you and your father.' She replied. He laughed, nodding while drinking again. Torhild rolled her eyes behind her cup while she drinked to.   
'You know the stories.'   
'Yes, your father gave us a settlement before and you destroyed it as soon as my father left. Now we give you a second change in good faith and you betrayed us again.'   
'In good faith.' He laughed loudly. Torhild didn't know how long she could pull this act of without doing something stupid to silence him. 'It was the heathen army who forced us to that betrayal.'   
'It was you and your men who killed my father.' She hissed softly, her eyes turning coldy. Aethelwulf looked at her, amused by the sudden change in her expressions.   
'It was your father who came here in the first place, to raid my fahters villages. Is it really the past that you want to dig up princess Torhild?' He asked, still amused. Torhild looked away, drinking her cup empty before she nodded at a servant asking for more. She looked how he poured the wine in before she turned to the king again.   
'What is it that you want King Aethelwulf?' She asked, polite again.   
'What do you think I want Torhild, you seem to be a smart young woman yourself.' He leaned a little in on her, his cup in his hands. She looked forward a moment, in the hall, to the other people.   
'You wouldn't send us home because what would stop us to come back later. So I think you want to make a deal, wouldn't be a surprice if you had some enemies somewhere here in Engeland. A great heathen army would be a show of force against everybody who wants to defies you, isn't it?' She said, leaning in a little bit more to. He started admiring her, she saw it in his eyes, the way he looked. He liked her thinking, her looks, she would be a nice addition to his kingdom.   
'Yes.' He nodded. 'Would you agree with those terms?'   
'Wich onces?' She asked.   
'I gave you the settlement for your people to live in. We contain your boats, command your armies and you live here, in the castle.'   
'What about my brothers?' She asked immidiatly.   
'I allow two of them to lead the heathen army, share in us defenses. The others stay captive, especially the cripple one.'   
'Scared of a cripple?' Torhild asked amused. That Ivar had so much impact on this men maked her proud somewere.   
'I heard stories princess.' He answered with a promesing look.  
'What if we don't accept those terms.' She got back to the negotiations. King Aethelwulf smiled and sat straight again, Torhild still leaned over a little.   
'Than we make an example out of your brother Ubbe, I will defaet your heathen army and we will conquer.' He said without hessiation. Torhild smiled a little before she drank from the wine.  
'You all figured it out, don't you.' She asked, smilling.   
'Yes, I have.'   
'It isn't good to be so confident my king.' She advised him.   
'And why is that? I have two childeren of Rangar here, hostage, they wouldn't do something reckless that the both of you could get killed.' He grinned. Torhild took a knife that laid aside a plate. She pushed it against her hand and looked at him, her fingers closing to a fist.   
'Because we are viking, sacrificing our lives to the gods in order to get victory is what we do,' she slitted the knife out of her fist and holded her hand open over her cup, showing him the blood that dripped out of the wound in her cup. 'I would be honored to give my life for my gods if it meant that my brothers could win this fight.' She spoke before taking the cup, drinking from the wine that was mixed with her blood. Aethelwulf looked at her, a little dazzled by the words, the actions she took.   
'I underestimated you princess.' He whispered.   
'I'm viking, did you thought it would be easier with me?' An almost loving smile spreading over her face.   
'So it's a no?'   
'That was not my answer. I will discuss it with my brothers, if you let me go at least.'   
'Why would I do that?' He reacted. She leaned in on him again.   
'Did you rather have a heathen army before your door? They will come, if you kill us or not. At least now I giving you some time to prepare yourself. Let me go and I will discuss it with my brothers, keep me here and you will find out soon enough how true those stories are.' She smiled devilish.


	17. // 16 //

'Princess.' King Aethelwulf started.   
'Torhild works fine.' She replied with a polite bow. Since the feast three days ago he still treated her like a guest. She had two guards with her all the time but she could go anywhere she wanted. Ubbe was less lucky, he still was locked up downstairs.   
'One of my scouts noticed an army heading for my kingdom.'   
'Told you they would come.' She replied with a confident smile. If he thought she was bluffing about it earlier than he was wrong.   
'It's a good thing that you leave to offer that deal.' He clapped in his hands towards his soldiers. Torhild felt the threat hanging in the air as soon as she was surrounded by them. 'If they move further here your brother will die, same if you don't return within three hours.' He announched, nodding towards his man who took her with her arms and pulled her towards the stabbles.   
'In so far the hospitality.'   
'You now it was never sush a thing.' He replied right away. Lucky for her she changed those dresses for her usual viking outfit. Torhild got an horse, she pulled herself in the saddle and turned the animal towards king Aethelwulf. 'If it goes wrong, kill her.' He smiled to his men. Torhild give him a sharp look before she followed the others out of the castle.

It wasn't the whole heathen army who lurked out of the forest, it was hardly half of it, what meant that the strategy changed of it was some kind of trap. The soldiers were smart enough to not ride in the forest. They left their horses on the egde and one of them pulled his sword, pressing it against her throat while they pushed her the forest in like some sort of a shield. In that sort time she spotted the army earlier they all had vanished in the forest, the only thing standing on the road before them was Ivar and his chariot. She felt the soldiers around her tensing about it. 'We will kill her if you don't obay.' One yelled towards him.   
'I see that.' Ivar replied, looking at Torhild instead of the men. His eyes were dark and fearless, every little bit of the emotion she knew sucked out of it. She gave him a reassuring look and he looked away to one of the soldiers. 'Get my brothers.' Ivar commanded a tree. Torhild looked at the man who came from after it and started running out of the forest. 'You know, you are just with just five, I have an army, you thing pointing a sword against her throat is gonna stop me from killing you all?' Ivar got back to business. Typical. Torhild carefuly turned her head to the soldier who threatend her.   
'I know what the king said, none of you will die, not on my hand and certainly not on his hand.' She said while giving Ivar a promesing look.   
'You serious?' He asked bored.   
'If you want Ubbe to live through the day, yes, deadly serious.'   
'Stand down.' Ivar commanded everybody withing distance. The soldier lowered his sword and Torhild gave thim a short look before she walked over to Ivar his chariot. He leaned over this egde, playing with a knife between his fingers. 'Why are you always the one in trouble?' He asked, softly pulling up the corner of his mouth. The cold looked maked place for something she knew, his cornerned look and it was only visable for her.   
'You don't have to be worried about me, I live the princess life.' She said on a sarcastic tone.  
'Ubbe?' He asked, his eyes travelled over her body looking for some injuries or something that would prove her words wrong. She laid her fingers under his chin and pulled his eyes back to hers.   
'I'm fine Ivar. Ubbe is catching up with some sleep, he is okey.' She reassured him. He nodded and turned his head, looking at the soldiers who stood in a circle within the vikings.   
'You know what I thought when I saw you riding towards us?'   
'That you really wanted to kiss me?' She guessed.   
'How do you know?'   
'I tought the same. But, Ubbe said to the king that I'm Ragnars daughter so,' she bited her lip and turned her head towards the road where she saw Hvitserk and her brother gallop. She pushed herself away from the chariot and looked at the both of them. Hvitserk embraced her as soon as he got of his horse, Björn gave those soldiers a skeptical look. 'Don't kill anybody.' She warned the both of them.   
'Spill, I don't think you have much time.' Björn began.   
'Glad to see you to big brother.' She nodded towards him. He smiled and rubbed her head like she was a little girl, she slammed it away.

Torhild told them everything that she could possible think of, from the fact that Aethelwulf was the king, the settlement was a lie until she came by the deal. In that whole time she was telling them everything they were all silent. Ivar mostly looked at his horse of the soldiers while he was thinking over what she said. Björn had his armes crossed before his chest while Hvitserk was playing with a twig. 'I should have killed that men when I had the change.' Björn began after she was finished talking.   
'You should have blood eagled Ecbert, like a told you to.' Ivar reacted in anger. Torhild turned against the chariot and looked up at him.   
'There is nothing we can do about that now, we should focus on that deal.' She said softly. Ivar gave her a quick look before he started gazing towards those soldiers again, stubborn.   
'What thinks brother of this?' Hvitserk asked.   
'Take the deal.' Torhild answered.   
'I'm not gonna surrender to that filty piece of a king.' Ivar hissed. Torhild expected trouble from Ivar, she knew he would react like this. She should stay there, as sort of a pet to the king and that was something none of them liked.   
'I know brother but we are a little outnumbered with the loss we had on the raid.'   
'Listen more to me brother, maybe you win sometimes.' Ivar reacted, giving Björn a condescending look. Björn pulled his fingers to fist trying to keep his cool with the hothead in the chariot.   
'I agree with Ubbe, we should take the deal.' Hvitserk shrugged.   
'And you,'   
'Ivar.' Torhild interrupted him. He looked back, his blue eyes flaming rage. 'I don't say that we should take it but we can use it in our advantage sometimes. I'm in that castle, as a guest, I can get imformation out.' She tried to calm down the situation. Ivar jerked his head away and looked in another direction.   
'How sister? You don't know what he will do with you if we do something wrong.'   
'He is willing to let two of you command the army if you obay the first weeks I can figure something out.' She tried to convince her brother. Björn shook his head slowly and looked towards those five soldiers. They just stood there, a little scared because they still were surrounded with those vikings. Lucky for them they were to far away to hear the conversation, exept for Ivar his yelling half the time.   
'So two of uss command the army and the others are captured? Locked up?'   
'Well,' she felt silent, slowly looking towards Ivar. King Aelthelwulf wanted Ivar locked up, because he was to unpredictable to have crawling around. He looked back, rolling his eyes.   
'I'm not gonna sit by and do nothing while you can walk around all princess alike.'   
'Can you be serious for a moment?' She asked angry.   
'I won't do it.' He shook his head. Torhild looked back at her brother.   
'If we take the deal your men can recuperate, you have the settlement and you have time to think about something.' She began again.   
'So you think we should do it?' He asked. Should they?   
'If he truly believes that he can tame a army of vikings, come on, how stupid is he?'   
'I don't like the fact that you are in there.' Hvitserk pointed in the direction the kingdom of the king was. Torhild sighned and gazed at the trees for a while, thinking about how she could make this easier.   
'What if I ask him that we all live in the settlement but he can send as many soldiers so that he can keep an eye on us?' She suggested. Hvitserk nodded slowly and by the looks of it Björn was willing to agree to that to.   
'Than we all are imprisoned, how are we gonna to fight back if the settlement is crawling of soldiers?' Ivar protested.   
'What do you prefer, me being locked up there or being locked up together but still have the change to do something?' Torhild lost her temper. Ivar, opened his mouth to react but she gave him a warning glance.   
'It's three against two, take the deal on those terms, I want you home, he can send a whole army if he likes to.' Björn agreed while walking back towards the horses they both came on. Torhild looked from her brother towards Hvitserk who smiled his charming loving smile before he walked after his brother. Finally she turned towards Ivar who gazed before him with clenshed teeth.   
'Be reasonable Ivar.' She whispered. He rolled his eyes and shook his head.   
'I'm not to reason with.' He reacted. Torhild pulled herself on the chariot, placing herself between him and his vieuw on those soldiers. He looked up at her and his expressions softened a little.   
'It's better to have all of us in one place than spreaded. You can't affort to lose more people and I'm not planning to walk around in dresses pretending that I love the place. It is he best option we have, knowing you you have already a plan.' She smiled carefuly. He didn't have to say anything, his eyes just said enough. Torhild laughed while she nodded slowly. 'I would be surpriced if it wasn't true.'   
'You know me to well Torhild.' He grinned. She petted him on the shoulder with a amused smile on her lips. Yes, she knew him to will, the friendship they build up over the past years had a lot of input on it.   
'I go have some deep conversations with the king.' She rolled her eyes. She wanted to jump of his chariot but Ivar took her wrist and pulled her back.   
'Come home Torhild, I need you.' He said, a little vunerable even. Torhild looked towards the soldiers who had let their attention slip from the moment Björn and Hvitserk left again. So they weren't really looking at the two in the chariot.   
'I really can't follow those moodswings of yours.' She smiled soft, pushing his chin up and placing her lips against his. She never thought in this way about Ivar but it fell all on it's place as soon as she felt his reaction, he pulled her closer around her waist, felt the tingling heat of his fingertips against her neck. It was a short kiss but one that meant more than anything. She stroke his jawline before she pulled back and opened her eyes. 'I'm gonna regret this, aren't I?' She asked him with an amused smile.   
'Possible.' He answered on an airy tone. She jumped of his chariot, smiling like an idiot. She stood still beside his horse and turned around to him again, his was gazing at her with that intense look.   
'Are you happy now?' She asked.   
'Not until you are home again.'   
'To do what?'   
'To keep you safe Torhild.' He reacted right away. She bow and walked after the soldiers towards the horses again. She kissed Ivar and she knew there was no turning back from that ... not that she wanted to.


	18. // 17 //

He just sat there, rubbing his beard while he looked to his plate with food. Torhild stood before him, Ubbe besides her. It was a week ... a whole week since she spoke her other "brothers" and she offered king Aelthelwulf the deal. He didn't liked it ... but he was strongly thinking about it, otherwise he wouldn't lock her up with Ubbe again for a whole week. It took him quite some time to come with an answer and even now, when they both stood before him he was still thinking about it. 'So Torhild, tell me, that deal, how much can I trust on you being with all your brothers in the settlement?' He asked her, still rubbing his beard. Torhild looked aside to Ubbe who really could use a bath and some fresh clothes.   
'We have a settlement to live and me and my brothers are together. Instead you get our manpower, you control our armies, you have our boats. We allow you to control us, put as much men in the settlement like you wish. If you want I can come here more often, do discuss the things you want.' She offered him. He had everything in control, why was he douthing this deal now ... after a whole week.   
'I would like you to stay here.' He pointed around him. Torhild looked to the woman besides him, she gave a jealous look back and Torhild looked to the ground.   
'Why?'   
'So I can control your brothers.' He smiled, looking at Ubbe.   
'Torhild is the youngest of us all, she needs the experience, we need her.' Ubbe tried. She didn't liked the idea of staying here and she was sure that Ivar would get mad about it, like usual.   
'Who do you fear the most?' Torhild asked him polite. He stopped rubbing his beard and smiled, pointing towards her.   
'You, and that cripple.'   
'Me?' She asked, impressed. She didn't do much since she was here but despite that he feared her, Björn would be proud.   
'You have more men, your army is stronger. Because of the raid we are weakened.'   
'Is it?' He asked surpriced. Torhild nodded, hoping that this would convince him ... and it did.

It was a show of force, King Aethelwulf with an army of hundered men behind him while Torhild and Ubbe drove after him. Björn walked through the wooden gate, arms crossed before his chest while he looked from Torhild towards the king. He looked always so relax, the way he stood there, with a grinn while he licked his lips. 'King now.' Björn said to Aethelwulf while he walked over to him, petting his horse on the neck. Torhild looked from on her horse over the settlement, she saw Hvitserk walking over the road to the gate.   
'Björn Ironside, I hope you will honor our deal?'   
'Offcourse. Thank you for taking care of my sister and brother.' He thanked the king. King Aethelwulf chuckled and turned around towards Torhild.   
'She didn't want to stay.'   
'I rather have her close.' Björn defended her immidiatly. The king nodded toward his soldiers and they started to march in the settlement. Torhild looked towards the people who all watched the soldiers, angry about who came interfere their business. Sounds behind them all jerked their heads in the other direction. Torhild saw her brother roll his eyes before she turned her head. A group of twenty vikings walked over the road before Ivar and his chariot.   
'Are you really that afraid that you need at least a hunderd men to contain us?' Ivar asked Aethelwulf sarcastic, stopping his chariot right besides his horse.   
'Cripple.' He greeted Ivar.   
'You really want me to kill of one of your men already?'   
'Ivar.' Ubbe warned him. Ivar spitted on the ground, tilting his head in amusement.   
'Where were you Boneless?' Aethelwulf asked. Torhild could see he was playing, testing Ivar his temper and it wouldn't take long for Ivar to snap, everybody knew that.   
'Maybe I was scouting your kingdom. Killing of some of your men.' He replied while showing his axe, red with blood. Torhild narrowed her eyes and looked from Ivar towards the king.   
'Don't test my patience boy, this deal easily can be broken again.'   
'I'm not the one who agreed with it. I would love to kill some of your men.' He grinned before he clicked his tongue and his horse walked the settlement in. Torhild looked after Ivar, knowing that he would cause a whole lot of problems once Aethelwulf returned to his castle.   
'If I get reports that my men are killed than the deal is off. Contain him.' The king pointed towards Ivar.   
'I will.' Torhild nodded. King Aethelwulf turned towards her.   
'It's your head princess, keep your army in check.' He hissed before he drove of with his horse and protection.   
'So now it's your army?' Björn asked amused when the king was out of hearing distance back to his castle, leaving his loyal men to spy on them.   
'No. Did you had a change to do something in the mean time?' She asked him hopeful. Björn took the reins of her horse and looked up to you.   
'I send word for mother.'   
'You serious?' Torhild asked smiling. Lagertha could safe them, she and all her shieldmaidens would make a lot of difference.   
'I send some of my men with a ship.'   
'We should make plans for the day queen Lagertha comes.' Ubbe began. They both got from their horses and Ubbe embraced his younger brother for a moment before he turned to Torhild.  
'Keep Ivar in check will you, he will get uss all killed.' Ubbe pointed towards the chariot of Ivar on the road through the settlement.   
'You put a lot of responsibility on my shoulders.' She said not so convincing as she should be. Ivar was a major problem, or at least his temper was.   
'We couldn't stop him from killing or brother, maybe you have more luck.' Ubbe smiled.   
'Not funny Ubbe.' Torhild reacted.   
'I just mean, if someone get through his head it's you.' He followed with a soft smiled. She remember her talk with Ubbe and not far after that thought came the thought of kissing him. A week was past and she still felt the linger from his lips on hers.

She found Ivar in front of the great hall, talking to Halfdan and king Harald. 'Princess.'   
'I'm being sick of the word princess, Torhild will do.' She smiled shortly towards Halfdan before she turned to Ivar. 'We need to talk.' She began. He narrowed his eyes, fully absorbing her. King Harald and Halfdan nodded before they walked away from the two of them. Ivar softly give his horse more reins and he walked further, Torhild walking beside his chariot. 'If you loose your temper, I will loose my head.' She began.   
'Did brother send you?' He asked.   
'Wich one?' Torhild joked. He relaxed a little and kept his eyes on the road while Torhild looked up to him. 'What were you talking about?' She pointed over her shoulder towards the two brothers before the great hall.   
'So you are here to spy on my?'   
'Ivar.' She reacted angry. He could be so confusing, always suspecting something, childish even. He hold still before a little house and crawled from his chariot, leaving it behind with Torhild. 'Can we at least talk?'   
'We are talking.' He smirked before crawling in the house. She left the horse with some slave and walked after him inside.   
'If you are planning something with king Harald than pleace stop, it's my head, he will come after me.' She tried to push through his stubborness. Ivar pulled himself on the bed and focust all his attention on his legs, unleasing the belt that kept them together. 'Nevermind. I'm tired.' She murmered after he didn't replied. She turned around ready to walk outside when he stopped her by trowing his axe right aside her head against the door. She closed her eyes, squeezing her fingers in her noice bridge, taking a really deep breath. She pulled the axe out the door and turned around towards Ivar. 'You lost something.' She smiled polite, walking over and handing him his axe. He took it, pulled her closer down, wrapping his fingers around her neck. He could choke her if he wanted, she was fragile but she knew he wouldn't. So Torhild only gazed back in his bleu strongheaded eyes while he squeezed a little more. It brought a whole different vibe around her, his dominance ... he killed Sigurd with it.   
'Glad to have you back.' He finally spoke, more sincere while he lost his grip, stroking her neck.  
'I'm not so sure if I'm glad i fit means I have to take care of your stubborn ass all the time.'   
'Hush Torhild.' He smiled amused. She shook her head and let her frustrations about him go.  
'Don't get me killed.' She warned him, clenshing his teeth together by pushing her finger up under his chin. His smile became more dark, intense and it would scare every other girl ... but not Torhild, she knew him for to long to never been intimidated by certain looks he could gave.   
'I would never get you killed.' He responded.   
'That temper of your lives his own life, more afraid from that.' His emotions changed with those words, he became a little vulnerable and she knew she couldn't leave him with that kind of uncertainness. Torhild crouched, laid her hands in lap while looking up at him. 'Ivar, your brothers said that you changed after the dead of Sigurd. You take far more risks than before. I don't want to be a risk, you need to promise me,'   
'I won't take any riskes, not with you.' He finished her sentence. His eyes turned emotional, like the ocean waves who found some peace under her steady look.   
'Thank you.' She whispered while standing up.   
'Everything for you princess.' He winked amused.   
'Don't it isn't funny anymore.'   
'For me it is.' He grinned. She rolled her eyes and walked to the door, she hesitated in the doorway before she turned back to him.   
'That kiss, did it meant something for you?' She asked carefully. Ivar frowned his eyesbrows, trying to unfold what she just asked to him.   
'It meant everything for me.' His voice was nothing more that a soft whispering, giving her the chills.   
'Good,' She strummed her fingers on the door, slightly smiling.   
'Don't go visit Hvitserk. I'm the jealous type.'   
'I'm not yours Ivar.' She reacted right away without looking to him. Not that she was planning to visit Hvitserk, she knew Ivar was very uncertain about that part of himself.   
'Yes you are.' She turned around and looked to him, biting her lip.   
'I knew I would regret it.'   
'No you won't, come her.' He commanded, on his usual dominant tone. Torhild sighed and walked over to him again, he pulled her down. She landed rather harch with her back on the bed, soaking in a breath under his piercing bleu eyes. 'Your mine, promise me.'   
'You have a very big mouth for such a small heart.' She teased him. His eyes darkened again and she laughed softly. 'Ivar, what are you afraid of?' Her voice loving, caring, her eyes just the same.  
'Losing you, not to that king, not to the gods, not to Hvitserk or your mother. You're mine, let me proof that.'   
'Lagertha will kill us..' She whispered, half in shame covering her eyes with her arm. Ivar took her arm away from her eyes, stroking his fingers over the skin of it. She shivered under his touth.  
'Promise me.' He demanded.   
'I promise Ivar.'   
'Good.' He placed a kiss in the curve from her neck to her colorbone. She closes her eyes, getting the same feeling as that one time she was on the beach after the sacrifice. 'You're good to go.' He pulled away so she could go.   
'Funny.' She murmured sarcastic, getting up and to the door.  
'Don't forget, you're mine.'  
' Yes, you know were to find me if you need me.' She waved to him, leaving him with as much desire as she had for the moment.


	19. // 18 //

The spear balanced on her flat hand. 'You sure you want to do this?' Torhild asked Ase. The girl stood before her, swinging her spear from left to fight, looking for the limits of her pain. Ase got hurt in the battle, a rider drove his horse right at her, pushing the animal against her shoulder whereby it pushed out of his place. A healer did the best he could for her and althrough it was healed, she did still felt enough of it. Torhild had only nine shieldmaidens left, it was heartbreaking but she didn't showed it to anyone. She tried to be strong, for the others but when she was alone she felt the sadness pressing on her shoulders, leaving her alone with her thoughts.   
'Don't hold back for me Torhild.' Ase pulled her out of her thought. She nodded and looked aside to Björn who sat before the great hall, watching them. Torhild took a better grip over her spear and nodded towards Ase, giving her permission to attack. The girl came at her, fearless like she always was. Torhild pulled her spear up, blocking the attack before she started to fight. It looked like a dance, wood against wood, girl against girl. Torhild could see that Ase still had a lot of pain, it weakened her attemps to get through the defenses of Torhild. And it didn't took Torhild long to break her down, turning around her body and smaching the spear against the back of Ase her shoulder. Ase felt down on her knees, toutching her own shoulder.   
'You're not healed Ase.' Torhild said concerned. She helped her friend back up and looked at the shoulder.   
'I will be fine, let me come on the missions that the king will give.'   
'No,' Torhild shook her head right away. 'You stay here, heal, we need you if the battle will get real Ase.' She explained further. Ase sighed and nodded on the advise of Torhild.   
'Do you have a plan?' She asked, looking towards Björn. Torhild followed her gaze towards her brother, Björn was always in thoughts, blaming himself for what happened and thinking about a solution.   
'No.' Torhild answered slowly.  
'And Ivar?' Ase asked. Torhild started the laugh, looked aside and shook her head.   
'You don't want to know his plans, it involves assasin a king in cold blood and taking over a kingdom.'   
'There is nothing wrong with that.' Ase laughed while walking away to her own place. Torhild smiled softly before she walked over to her brother, sitting aside him and looking just the way he did.   
'How is the plan coming?' She asked after a little bit of silcence.He turned his head and looked at her.   
'Work in progress.' He smiled softly. There was always a soldier who watched her, or him. The soldiers always kept an eye on her and the brothers.   
'Care to share with your sister?' She asked softly, trying not to attract the attention of the soldiers who already where watching. Björn shook his head slowly and pushed his body up, walking in the great hall. Torhild followed him, Ubbe en Hvitserk sat around the table. 'Ivar wants to assasin the king.' She said when the door felt shut behind her. It was the only place the soldiers didn't go in, because she almost friendly asked them not to.   
'Maybe we should let him.' Hvitserk said with a mouth full. Torhild walked over to the boys and sat aside Hvitserk, taking some of his food with a short smile.   
'You don't want to get him in control of the situation. He has King Harald already behind him, I would be carefull.' Torhild explained. Ivar let a hugh part of his guard down around her so she saw a little bit more of him than usual, not that she was all the time with him. In the two days that had past there wasn't much changed. He kept an eye on her but so far that was it. 'So you better have a plan before he goes through with his.' She told the boys. Hvitserk didn't care much, he just at further. Ubbe putted his knife in the table and turned it slowly under his finger, thinking about it.   
'The plan is simple, we take the settlement back first.' Björn announched. They turned their heads around when the door pushed open and Ivar crawled in.   
'Making plans without me?' He asked sarcastic. He crawled to the table en pushed his body up, sitting aside of Torhild. He looked towards Hvitserk who sat on the other side of her and she just gave him a warning look not to get in to the whole "you are my property" thing.   
'If my mother comes, we take back the settlement, nobody of his soldiers lives to see another day.' Björn explained. Torhild chewed on a piece of bread, her head resting on her hand.   
'They will send other riders, for messages, controlling the place?' Ubbe replied on the plan.   
'I can go. He won't be suspicious if I'm there.' She said. She felt Ivar his eyes almost stung in her body but she ignored it while looking at her brother.   
'Not alone.'   
'I will accompany her.' Hvitserk offered. King Aethelwulf wouldn't mind if Hvitserk would join her, he was not a threat, not like Ivar was.   
'Again with the whole hostage thing, why can't I go?' Ivar asked, already raised in anger.   
'We know what you want to do Ivar, besides, you in that castle is asking for problems. And we need you here.' Björn answered. Torhild looked aside to Ivar who sighed stubborn and laid his head over his arms, pounting. He didn't got further on it because of what Björn had said at the end. Yes, they needed Ivar and his brilliant mind here if they wanted this to work.   
'So until the arrival of queen Lagertha we just do what they ask?' Ubbe finally said. Björn nodded slowly. He didn't agree with it but it was the only thing to buy some time. When Lagertha would arrive with more manpower they could move against king Aethelwulf, until then they had to do his bidding.

Ase interrupted their plans by walking in. 'We have problems.' She annouched with a serious face. Torhild looked to her brother who kept his cool and pushed away from the table, walking outside. Torhild walked after him, Hvitserk and Ubbe helped their brother. She didn't saw it immidiatly when she walked out, but when she saw it she felt a certain anger brewing in her body. King Aethelwulf had send more men, from another kingdom. They were pulling a woman on the street before they searched her house and this they did with everyone.   
'From now on, this settlement is mine.' A man on a white stallion began. He must be some kind of a right men to the king, she didn't recognized him. He held his horse still before the great hall, a couple of riders aside him and looked towards the brothers and Torhild, smirking with hatered and power. 'Princess Torhild.' He began. Ase pulled slowly a knife out of her belt but Torhild shook her head while she passed by. The man got of his horse, fully armored and intimidating. Torhild changed a quick look with her brother for she walked over to him. She looked up, tried to keep her proud up when she saw the mockery on his face. He pushed his hand up, fully in armor and slapped her with the back of his hand right on the cheek. The impact was so big, she felt right to the ground. She heard strugglings behind her, Ivar hissing against his brothers to let him loose. 'The king caught your lie, you are not a daughter of Ragnar, for that you fall as property under the king. He is so generous to give you one last change. Don't ruin that princess.' He smiled down to her. She stayed put on the ground, her cheek heated from the blow. She felt some blood dripping down from her it while he got back on his horse. Torhild pushed up on her hands and turned her head towards her brother, he had his fist in rage ready but tried to keep calm when the soldier road of with his men. It didn't took long before somebody dropped aside her.   
'Look at me love.' Hvitserk demanded. Torhild clenshed her teeth, in heat, in anger, in fear and douth before she pushed her body up, ingoring him and walking away before somebody could hold her back.


	20. // 19 //

Torhild never felt like this before, she never wanted to kill someone so badly, she never wanted to run away so fast as she did now. Her emotions didn't found grounding in her head and it bounched her from one place to another. Whoever that new soldier in charge was, he wasn't good for the village and she knew that if she should stay he would provoke her to the limits. So she took a saddle and dropped it on one of the animals they had. That assasin plan Ivar had all maked sense now, even if it wasn't the way. The horse didn't knew what overcame him when she saddled him so harch, blood still dripping from her cheek. 'Torhild.' She didn't turned around to her brother, she just kept her eyes on the horse. And when he was ready she leaded him to the middle of the road. Björn took the reins and looked at her. 'You are running away?' He asked. Torhild let her eyes fall on the other brothers and Ase who stood on a safe distant, Ivar with possible more rage in his eyes than she had.   
'Let me go, I can do it on foot to.' She pointed neutral to the road. No, she wouldn't get her emotions in the way from her task.   
'Why are you doing this?' His voice wasn't deep like usual, he cared enough to soften it a little.   
'Why?' She let the reins loose and pointed towards the road leading to the great hall. 'I'm no good here brother, I don't belong here, don't you see, I putt you all in danger. He is challeging me to make a mistake, to let one of you make a mistake.'   
'We won't.' Reassured Björn her.   
'No, brother. Don't tell me you didn't want to kill him, I wanted to kill him, Ivar still wants to kill him.' She nodded towards Ivar who sat on the ground now, between his brothers. Everyone who knew Ivar a little knew that he wouldn't rest until he got some kind of revenge. The only think that saved that soldier was the fact that Ivar hung between his two brothers. 'I'm going back, I'm safer their then I am here.' She whispered, taking the reins back, putting a foot in the stirrup. Björn pulled her away from the horse and slammed her with her back against a wooden house.   
'You are going nowhere. The safest place for you to be is by my side.' He warned her. Torhild clenshed her jaws in anger and only looked at him, stubborn and angry.   
'What holds him back to rape me? Or worse, murder me in my sleep. He can do anything, they can do anything and we nothing. We can't touch them but they can touch us. That won't be the last time.' She pointed, yelling almost. She tried to push him away but he didn't give in. 'Björn!' She yelled, almost pulling out her axe to knock him out of his position. He grabbed the axe before she could, preshed his hand a little harder against her shoulder until she shrank a little in pain. His face expressions stoftened a little, he pulled his hand away from her schoulder and laid it against her good cheek.   
'Don't let your emotions get away with you. You are young Torhild, you are still learning and you will overcome this. Don't make any rash decisions. Sleep about it, if you tomorrow still think the same thing than you and Hvitserk can go.' He stroke his thumb over her cheek and smiled concered. 'You maybe aren't a daughter of Ragnar but you are a daughter of Lagertha, there is nothing that beats that.' And he walked away from her. Torhild looked at him before she looked at the horse. Maybe she had to think about it, just one night. Her eyes gazed towards a group of soldiers, she recognized that man immidiatly. She touched her cheek, looked at the blood on her fingertips and walked away.

Her own words kept following her. What if he would come to rape her? What if he came to kill her in her sleep. Torhild laid with a knife on her chest, looking to the ceiling trying to get in front of her own emotions. What had she done ... the deal maked it impossible to do those soldiers harm, or unleas her own life was taking. Maybe it was for the best, but what then, war? Violence? As long as her mother didn't come they hadn't the manpower to take down King Aethelwulf. Being in his kingdom would be safer for her but who would hold Ivar back here? So Björn was right, she had to stay here, face the problems and find a solution to it before it was to late. Or she could just solve the problem by the root, killing Aethelwulf, just like Ivar wanted. She jerked her head around when she heard something outside. Torhild came from the bed, her knife steady in her fist while she walked to the door that slowly cracked open. And then she saw a couple of hands pulling a body inside and she lowered her knife. Ivar looked up to her. 'What were you going to do, kill me?' He asked neutral. She shut the door behind him and turned back to the bed.   
'What is it Ivar, not in the mood to handle you right now.' She murmured, dropping down on the bed again, lying in the same position, knife resting on her chest.   
'Do you expect company?'   
'I mean it Ivar.' Torhild warned him. He didn't replied, he just pulled himself on the bed, sitting beside her lying body.   
'I will kill him for you.' And there it was, the promise she already spotted in his eyes when Björn came looking for her.   
'Then you kill me to.' She whispered. He shifted his weight on the bed, hovering over her so she hadn't a change to ingore his strong blue eyes.   
'I will protect you.' He reassured her. She looked at him, wanted to push him away but he grabbed her wrist before she could. He pushed it aside her head, not letting go of it.   
'Go away.' She reacted.   
'It's me Torhild.' He just said and she broke. She felt her emotion shatter in hundered pieces while tears started welling up in her eyes.   
'I never felt like this before, so powerless, I hate that feeling.' Her tears turned in anger again, she wrapped her fingers around his collor. 'We need to kill him Ivar, Aethelwulf.' She insisted. He looked at here, gauging her thoughts. It was weird that she was the one out of control now and he the steady one was.   
'We will, I will kill him for you.'   
'I want to kill him myself.' She hissed softly. Her fingers came loose from his collor, reaching for the knife on her chest. His hand still pushed her wrist aside her head in the bed, his head hardly from hers removed. 'With this knife.' She whispered, holding the knife up while she intens gazed at it. Something changed in Ivar his eyes, was it proud? Admirering? Lust? He looked at the knife with a strange sence of affection, like it was that knife who would safe everybody. 'I kill him.' She repeated herself. Ivar let her wrist go, his fingers stroking her arm and she shuddered under his touch before he stopped at her shoulder. Torhild relaxed under her rage, her confident to kill Aethelwulf. She found some control back over her emotions and let her anger settle in. 'Am I good enough, a shield maiden?' She asked, still looking at the knife. Ivar took it from her, laid it aside him on the bed. She looked at him again, to the strong affection in his eyes.   
'Yes you are.' He whispered while lowering his head closer to hers. Torhild studied his face, where was all his confident? His cockiness to be the best? 'Am I good enough, to be yours?' He asked on his turn. She never really replied on the question, she pulled him closer, placed her lips against his. He hestitated for a second, before he opened his lips and kissed her back. It was a different kind of kiss, not with the same passion as in his chariot, more intens but steady. Torhild arched her back, pushing her body against his and it maked him hungrier. His kiss became demanding, he let her lips go, traveled his over her jawline, neck, her colorbone. She had Hvitserk more than once but it wasn't the same. Her fingers untied his shirt, pulling it over his head. Roaming his skin with her fingers while she kissed him again crossed a line for him. She felt him tensing when her fingers roamed his lower stomach.   
'Ivar.' She whispered against his lips, in longing to want more.   
'Torhild, I can't, you know that. Besides, you're not in the right mind.' He murmuled against her throat, leaving small kisses everywhere. She wrapped her fingers around his chin and pulled him back so she could watch him.   
'What a slavegirl is forced to do is not the same as what I can do out of love. And I'm in the same mind as you currently.' That last part a little stubborn. Ivar chuckled, let his body fell aside her on the bed. She turned on her stomach, looking angry. 'You ruin a perfectly good moment.'   
'You should sleep.' He protested. She pulled herself a little closer, resting her fingertips on his bare chest.   
'Since when are you all about ingoring inner instinct?' She asked. Ivar studied her face and while he did it she saw a little bit of his old self coming back.   
'I'm fearless in a fight, I will kill everybody without mercy but loving somebody like I loved you all those years isn't that easy for me.' And she knew that. Ivar was always distant against everybody. Only around Torhild, when nobody looked he dropped his guard and reaveled then a whole other part of himself. She turned her head when she heared some soldiers walking by, that and the fact Ivar touched her cheek brought everything back.   
'I will go back to the king, I will live there and I will kill him on the right moment.' She encouraged her own plan. Ivar smiled a little, a tender but slightly proud smile.   
'Only if you let me come.'   
'Or what else?' She challeged him. Now his eyes became hungry again, dominant, like she was just from him.  
'Or you stay here and we figure it out.' He answered. Torhild looked at his chest before she turned on her back, both looking at the ceiling.   
'He will provoke you.'   
'And I will kill him if he tries.'   
'Ivar,' she started in despare. He held his hand before her mouth, turning his back towards the door.   
'Is this the princess her part?' She heared a man asking. She recognized the voice, it was that man, the man who hitted her. Torhild pushed her body up and looked for the knife but Ivar already had it in his hands.   
'Yes, we think so, do you want me to wake her?'   
'No, let her be afraid for some time. She can tell herself that she is a viking but she's just a girl, I will break her.' She heared them softly laughing before the sounds faded away.   
'It's your choise Torhild but if you stay,' he looked aside to her. 'I'm not letting you out of my sight.'   
'I hoped you would say that.' She whispered. It worked, she became afraid ... shieldmaidens didn't suppose to be afraid, they had to be fearless. 'I will kill him.' She said to herself while laying back again.   
'Yes, you will.' Ivar reassured, playing with the knife while he kept watch over her.


	21. // 20 //

The streets where empty, it was like everyone stayed inside while their inside was outside. Everywhere laid clothes, crates, personal affects of the vikings who lived in the settlement. Torhild sat crouched aside a wooden pole before the little house. Her eyes gazed the streets, looking for the soldiers who were nowhere to be found. It was quite, except for some noices far of there was nothing, not even a singing bird. The ground was heavily disturbed, leaving mud and hooveprints behind in the silence. Ivar crawled outside, looking down the path that leaded to the center of the settlement. Torhild saw something shiny in the mud and stood up, picking it up from in the middle of the path. It was a bracelet, a vikingbracelet that was giving to all the boys who became men ... and it just laid there. Her fingers stroke away the mud on it while she turned back to Ivar, crouching before him. 'Do you think the gods are punishing us?' She asked, still looking at the bracelet.   
'Why would they do that?'   
'I don't know. It's way to quiet.' She replied, looking back down the streets.   
'Let's find out why.' He suggested. Torhild looked back at him and nodded slowly. Ivar was up all night, keeping her safe from harm. Only she wanted to keep him and this whole settlement safe and that wouldn't work if she go to the King herself.   
'I'm staying.' She decided. He looked at her, his bleu eyes almost burning with that unpredictable set of emotions.   
'The only way this will work is if you don't show your emotions, you have to be like me, you have to show him you aren't afraid.' Be like him ... Yesterday she was like him, willing to take a irrational decision just by going on her own emotions. She had a taste of what he was struggling with all those years.   
'The same goes for you Ivar.'   
'Can I kill him at least?' He asked almost to innocent it maked her laugh.   
'Yes you can, when the time is right.' But he didn't replied on that, his focus and mind were already on killing that man. She laid a finger under his chin, turning his head back. 'Promise me you won't kill him.'   
'I'll try.' He nodded, giving nothing of reassuring with his eyes.   
'That's not enough.'   
'It's the only thing you get princess.' He smiled that last word, with a cocky flair around it. She stroke her finger away from under his chin and stood up.   
'Let's go see.'

A lot of the people stayed inside, the other part stood assembled before the great hall in half a circle. A pile of weapons in the middle, soldiers walking in and out the great hall with even more. Ubbe sat on his knees, a knife against his throat and a eye black from a blow. 'Dediced the princess to finally show up?' Everybody turned towards their heads and maked some room for her and Ivar. 'In the company of that cripple.' He spotted. She didn't need to look down to know how Ivar would look back. 'How is your cheek?'   
'Fine, no thanks to you.' She replied neutral, walking over to her brother. But two soldiers prevented her and Ivar from getting further. Torhild knew it was an order they followed so she turned around to him again. 'I never catched you name.' She began. He smiled amused by the confident she showed. Ivar always supported a lot of that just by being besides her.   
'Lord Edgar.' He answered her. Now she had at least a name to the man Ivar was going to kill, somwhere between now and forever ... she was pretty sure it wouldn't take him a forever to kill that man. 'Take their weapons.' He commanded some of his men. Torhild looked towards her brother who softly shook his head before she putted her hands up so they could get to her belt. She would get that knife back, one way or another. Ivar was less willing and it took two of them to get in control of him. While they were struggling she looked to the Lord. He looked at Ivar, like he was looking for some weakness in that boy. There wasn't any, she could tell him that. When they handed all their weapons the soldiers stepped away so she could get to Björn, they even released Ubbe. 'As from now on you will do as I ask. Your crops will be part of my property and your houses are. Secrets are no longer secrets if you want to live through the day.' He yelled for the whole crowd to hear. With that last part he looked at Torhild and the brothers. 'Going out of this village is under escort and of course, weapons are only necessary if needed.'   
'What about the raids we have to for King Aethelwulf?' Björn asked, his armed crossed before his chest. Lord Edgar turned around and pointed toward the leader of this settlement.   
'Yes, offcourse. When I'm getting orders you will know right away, for now you all stay put.' He pointed to the ground. Torhild just looked at him, with a total neutral gaze. The lord walked back to his horse, pulling himself in the saddle again. 'Every mistake, every bit of protest will mean the doom for one of you. If you do as I please there don't gonna be any troubles.' He said with a promesing look towards Torhild. She looked how he drove of, his men assambling the weapons in a chariot before following hem. The other part just stayed to keep an eye on everyone. Torhild relaxed a little and looked to the black eye from Ubbe, he nodded reassuring and she smiled softly.   
'I will kill him.' Ivar noticed, like he didn't wanted it to do it before.   
'You will do nothing.' Björn warned him. Ivar looked up, his eyes with the misschief he always had around Björn.   
'Are you really going to do nothing? You gonna sit her and do as they please, living the happy life? What for a leader are you.' He spitted in reaction on the warning. Björn crouched, wrapping his fingers around Ivar his throat. 'This is your fault Björn Ironside.' He sneered softly, temping Björn in doing things he would regret. But Björn just looked at him, anger all over his face, teeth clenshed together. 'Come on, get it over with.' Ivar laughed.   
'Stop it.' Torhild said while laying her hand on Björn his shoulder. 'Ivar is right.'   
'What do you say Torhild?' Björn asked before getting up, he spitted before Ivar on the ground. 'You stay away from my sister.' He warned the cripple.   
'Where were you when the soldiers came to her house this night, asking the Lord of they have to wake her up? Nowhere, you were pouting on you big throne while I was protecting her.' Ivar hissed in anger.   
'Is it true?' Hvitserk asked stunned by the news, Torhild nodded slowly, looking at the ground instead of to one of them.   
'And you brother, always saying you love her and want to marry her but where were you? Like, is anyone really give it a thought that the only person truly in danger is Torhild.' He reacted in his torn of anger. Ubbe said nothing, he just listened while Hvitserk started to walk fort and back.  
'I'm not the only one,'   
'Shut up.' Ivar snapped towards her. She turned around and walked down the path, away from ... that, whatever that was again.

She found Ase on the egde of the village with the other girls. They all just sat there, watching the nature. 'How do you feel?' She asked her friend. Ase lifted her shoulders for a moment, not really caring over how she felt.   
'Do we have a plan?' One of them asked. Torhild sat down in the grass and picked a little straw, playing it between her fingers.   
'They are arguing, like usual.' She looked in the direction the great hall was.   
'About what?'   
'Me, like usual. I shouldn't have come here.' She murmured.   
'It's not your fault Torhild.' Ase reacted right away. Torhild looked up and smiled softly before she looked towards the way their boats layed.   
'I need somebody to get out of this camp.' Torhild whispered in her own thoughts. That little plan immidiatly took all their attention.   
'To do what?' Someone asked. Torhild looked around, subtle, looking for some soldiers but the one closed to her was just far away to not hear the conversation.   
'Laugh here and there a little, like we talk marrying vikings or something.' She said to the others. Ase immidiatly started to laugh and Torhild didn't know better than laugh with her. On the end of it they were all laughing about really nothing.   
'We should laugh more, it's healty, but tell,' Ase laughed, getting a little more serious between that and her words.   
'There will somebody watching along the coastline, if we want my mother to sail in unnoticed there has to be somebody of us out there. Kill whoever is watching the sea and rivers and guide my mother back here.' She explained to the others. Björn had said that the messenger would tell Lagertha not to sail to the usual docking point. That meant her boats would lay somewere else.  
'I will go.' Ase putted her hand up while another one started to laugh again, just for the fun of it. The soldier looked over his shoulder a couple of times but didn't noticed their plan.   
'No, you are far to often by my side, Lord Edgar would notice.' Torhild shook her head.   
'We will.' Two others said. Torhild nodded and smiled softly.   
'You have to sneak out by night, one first the other two days behind. We have to stretch over the village so they can't tell with how many we still are.' Torhild explained further. She saw the excitment in the girls their eyes and that was a good thing, Ivar was right, they couldn't give up that easy. She was surpriced that Björn did. 'In the time being we train, we make ourselves ready for battle, his or ours.' Torhild ended it. Everybody nodded, laughed again and that soldier never noticed they had maked a plan.


	22. //21 //

The sparring sticks maked a rather hollow sound through the surrounding, the one knock a little louder than the other. It were the only weapons ... and you really couldn't call it a weapon to begin with. But it was enough, Torhild smiled when she felt the strenght that Ase had coming back. She tried to sweep her feet from underneath her body but Ase just jumped over it, smaching Torhild against the back of her head. Her breathing was unsteady, her balance a little lost by the hit so Ase knocked her against the knees and Torhild dropped to the ground. She groaned loudly and rolled over to her back. 'You need to get faster Torhild.' Ivar said from where he sat. Ase gave her a hand and pulled her up, smiling from ear to ear. Torhild turned around facing him.   
'Says the one who sit against a tree.' She pointed her stick to the tree he was sitting against. They were alone, the three of them, somewhere on the egde of the settlement and a little out of sight. After a whole week of dramatics everyone found his place. Ivar and Björn stopped fighting, she and her brother talked not that much as usual and everybody still listened to Lord Edgar. Sad situation. Two of her girls had slipped out of camp and nobody asked about it, nobody really knew except for Ivar and the other girls.   
'I'm in shape.' He said with that smug grin over his face. Torhild stroke the back of her head a little and the both of them just laughed about it.   
'I will be right back, looking for some water.' Ase said. Torhild nodded and walked over to Ivar, putting her stick against his shoulder, giving a little push with it.   
'You should train more.'   
'To give them the satisfaction of discovering my weak points?' He replied with frowned eyebrown. He pulled the stick away so all of the sudden that she lost her balance. He pulled her on his lap, her knees on each side of his body.   
'You have no weakness.' She answered with a smile. She and Ivar ... it was hard to resist him on places like this.   
'You are my weakness.' He said before pulling her head towards his, kissing her passionate. She wrapped an arm around his shoulder, pressing her upper body even closer to his, he groaned and she chuckled a little.   
'We shouldn't.' She whispered, looking in those amazing blue eyes. Beside of Ase nobody suspect what was going on between the two of them. Yes, they all knew there was a tight friendship but love ... Björn would kill her. He pulled her aside in a swift turn. Torhild landed on her back in the grass and Ivar hovered over her.   
'Why?' He ask, pressing his lips against her throat in desire.   
'Because you don't want anybody to find out what your weakness is.'   
'You have a point.' He agreed, not pulling back for just another moment.   
'Torhild.' She heared Ase saying. Ivar pulled back, with a cocky grin and Torhild gave her friend a innocent smile. 'Björn and lord Edgar are on there way.' She announched. Her face flattened immidiatly, the love in Ivar his eyes turned to coldstone walls in seconds. What did he need now?

'Training?' Lord Edgar asked as soon as he saw Torhild and Ase with their fighting sticks.   
'We have to do something.' She replied neutral. Lord Edgar looked towards Ivar who sat against his tree, looking that man like he was planning on killing him right now.   
'Lord Edgar had some news.' Björn announched. But it wasn't that what the lord wanted to do, he looked at the fighting sticks and drew his own sword.   
'You dare?' He asked her. Torhild looked towards her brother who shook his head, even Ivar shouted out warning with his eyes.   
'Don't want to be of any trouble. What was it that you came to say?' She asked polite.   
'Hush now, fight me.' He ordered with a rather friendly voice. Torhild didn't trust it but what could she do? His order was final so she had to ... or maybe someone would get hurt because she refused to fight him. She took more grip over her fighting stick and smiled, in concession. He walked towards the middle of their little field and attack with brute force, cutting her stick right in half when she tried to defense herself. She looked at both halves of her stick and turned them around her wrist, knowing that she was a little better with two weapons than with one. His sword was sharp enough that every blow he gave chopped a little part of her sticks. Ivar sat straight, she couldn't see his look but she knew he was ready to do whatever the situation would bring. After more than an hour of training she was exhausted, not giving in to the lord she tried to at least hit him once, what worked, hitting him right in de stomach. But his reaction on that cause his sword against her throat. 'Nice footwork.' He whispered in her ear. Torhild let her sticks fall and putted a warning finger up towards Ivar who crawled already some distant towards them. If he had an axe he would kill the lord already.   
'What did you come to say?' She asked him. He let her loose, not without leaving a little bleeding mark in her neck from his sword.   
'We are gonna attack a kingdom. Orders from the king.' He announched. Torhild forces a smile on her lips, looked at her brother who just stared back at her.   
'When do we leave?'   
'Over two days. Assemble your men princess.' He commanded before walking away, leaving Björn with her, Ase and Ivar. When he was out of sight she pressed her fingers against the little cut on her throat.   
'Can I kill him now?' Ivar asked impatient.   
'Maybe battle will kill him. You heared him, assemble your army brother.' She said to her brother. He nodded and looked towards Ivar for a second or two.   
'We need to talk.' He said to Ivar. Ivar rolled his eyes in a reaction but started crawling after her brother, leaving her and Ase behind.

The usual meetings were from now on accompanied by the lord and some of his men. Torhild and her brother stood on opposite sides, he had Ubbe and Hvitserk with him and Torhild had the dangerous part from the settlement, Ivar, King Harald and Halfdan. Ivar wanted to make a point, fight without actually fighting, Björn ... she didn't know what his problem was but he did the bidding from the lord. Torhild asked herself of the Lord threatened him with something, it wasn't for the brothers to give up without a fight. 'We are going to raid again,' Björn began before he got itterupted by lord Edgar.   
'Before we began we have o attent a small detail within this settlement.' Torhild tensed a little with those words. 'Somebody is stealing weapons.' He announched. It couldn't be more obvious but everybody looked at Ivar, like he was the one.   
'Why is everybody staring at me?' He said bored by the fact everybody always accused him. Torhild knew it wasn't Ivar so she let her eyes go over the other people present in the great hall.  
'Did you?' Björn asked.   
'No, would you think I risk her life over some weapons.' Ivar hissed, pointing towards Torhild. The lord was amused by the anger that runned between the two brothers.   
'There won't be any problems if the person who did it stepped forward.' Lord Edgar suggested. Nobody moved and the lord gave a small nod towards his soldiers who came for her, grabbing her with her arms and pulling her from her seat.   
'No!' She protested, trying to slow their pace by putting her feet in front. They pushed Torhild on her knees aside the lord and she immidiatly looked towards Ivar and Ase, she had to keep him on it's place, even Halfdan helped with that.   
'Don't punish her for something someone else did.' Hvitserk hissed.   
'That's how it goes, I told you, one mistake and she would get punished for it.'   
'I'm gonna kill you when I have a change.' She whispered in rage. He pulled her braid, her head jerking on her back so she had to watch him right in the eyes.   
'I want to see you try.' He laughed. She wanted to spit on him or something but he already shifted his attention. A week .... It took them a week to do something that would get them caught. 'We Christians put people on a cross who have sinned, if nobody is coming forward she will be nailed to a cross.' He smiled polite. Her eyes turned in fear, she looked from him to her brother.   
'Björn!' She yelled in despare. He came forward, eyes warning battle if he didn't release her. But then the real perpetrator came forward, a men she didn't even really knew well.   
'It was me.' He said, giving Torhild a concerned look.   
'Why you did it?' The lord asked.   
'Because I'm not gonna bow for a Christian lord like you, we are viking!' That last one he yelled but nobody dared to join him in roar.   
'For that you will die, but not by my hand. Princess Torhild will give you your punishment.' He softly said. Torhild her eyes widened and she looked to the man, than towards her brother.   
'I will kill him.' Ivar volunteered.   
'Ivar the Boneless, I heard great stories about you.' Lord Edgar began, walking over to Ivar and crouched before him. Torhild closed her eyes, praying that Ivar wouldn't loose his temper in the moment. 'Well you know what they say about great stories, you have to see them before you can believed them.'   
'Is that an inventation?' Ivar asked emotionless. And again, the lord just walked away until he stood beside the man again.   
'Torhild will kill him, a dead by your chosing, it is that or facing a cross yourself prinsess.' He set a deal. Not really the kind of deal she could do something about. 'You're a viking, dead wouldn't be so hard for you guys, right?' But Torhild didn't look at him, she looked to the man. He gave her a slow nodded, giving her the premission to kill him.   
'I rather die on your hand than on his princess. The gods will welcome me in Valhalla, I will be reunited with my family.' He said softly, accepting his dead. Torhild closed her eyes for a moment, tried to find her inner side, a side that had something from Ivar. When she opened them they were distant, cold almost. She pulled out a sword from the soldier and walked over to the man, slitting his throat in one swift motion. Blood soaked in his clothes before he fell on the ground, blood spreading over the wooden floor.   
'Is that all?' She asked.   
'Thank you Torhild. I hope everybody understands now what it cost. You are outnumbered.' Lord Edgar said for the whole group. Torhild said between Ivar and Ase again, keeping her hands on her back because they were shaking from what she just did. Ase wrapped her fingers through hers, giving a little comfort. Ivar just looked at the lord, thinking of hundered possible ways to kill him. She killed a man, she killed some of her own and that because he wanted to fight for the great heathen army. Torhild looked over her shoulder towards King Harald, he only nodded, knew what she was thinking without using words. And when she looked at her brother she saw the same ... they were viking, they were stronger than this. That man was right, what did they had to fear? If they would die, it was for their own, in battle, fighting for what they loved and not under the threat of a mad man. Björn stood up, facing everybody.   
'Assemble the great heathen Army.' And he didn't say it to please the lord and king in his battle, he said it because it was time to take this place back. They were viking after all and vikings didn't bend, they didn't break, they fight and conquer.


	23. // 22 //

'What did he say to you? That maked you so loyal.' That last word a little sarcastic. Her eyes looked toward lord Egdar who road it front of the army, with his men. It was a day walking, except for some small group back at the settlement everybody was going to battle and raid.   
'You don't want to know Torhild.' Hvitserk answered instead of her brother. She looked from him back towards her brother with a questioning face.   
'You're my sister. I can be reckless in battle, kill every lord who try to take us over but when it comes to you, family I will let go my proud if it means it will keep you safe.' He explained pointing towards his two other brothers. 'Same for them.' He followed. She didn't know what the lord had said but it was enough.   
'And what is the plan now? You changed your mind, right?'   
'Yes but I think we should waith on mother.'   
'Any time now right?' She asked hopefull. It was quite the journey but weeks had past now so Lagertha could arrive any moment. Torhild has send one of the girls to the others, if her mother arrived she would get word of it. 'Can we waith that long?'   
'Will see. If we come unharmed out of the raid we attack them by surprice, otherwise we go home and waith for our mother.' Björn explained. Torhild nodded and looked toward the lord while she thought back to that man she had killed. Would lord Edgar see it coming, an attack.   
'If there will be a battle, can't we slaughter his men during it?' Ubbe asked. It was quite the army, if they could slink it they would have a little advantage on the situation.   
'Let us first see what we have to fight.' Björn concluded. Torhild looked towards Ivar who road his chariot on the edge of the army, king Harald and Halfdan with him.   
'He is planning something.' Hvitserk nodded. Everybody looked at Ivar who laughed about something Halfdan said. It wasn't something that you saw often, him laughing so spontaneous.  
'Do we need to get worried?' Björn asked. They all looked toward Torhild now. She opened her mouth but shutted it no far after.   
'The worst he can do is kill the lord.' She shrugghed.   
'If he does that we fight two army's. And if word gets out to king Aethelwulf than we have a serious problem on our hands.' Björn thinked out loud. He had a point, they fighted one joined force now but if he would kill the lord his army would turn against him. Maybe she should talk with him, talk it out of his head only she wasn't so sure if she could do that with Harald and Halfdan.

They maked camp a few miles from the kingdom they would take over. Torhild her horse galloped over the field after Lord Edgar with some of his men, her brother and Ivar. They stopped on a hill from where you could see the kingdom they had to take over. 'This is it.' The lord pointed out. Torhild came of her horse and walked over to the egde, looking toward the castle and the village. Battleplans wasn't her expertise so she turned towards her brother and Ivar.   
'How many gates?' Björn asked the lord, he pointed towards the nord and south. 'What is it that you want to do? Do we need to kill them all of do we need to capture their king or lord?' He continud his thoughts.   
'I hope I can kill something.' Ivar murmured. The lord turned his head and looked towards Ivar who had that typical arrogance on his face. But he didn't say a thing and just turned to Björn.  
'They aren't loyal to the one king, king Aethelwulf, we are here to make a deal. But if they fight, we fight back.'   
'You can threat their princess instead of ours than.' Ivar smilled meaningless. Torhild didn't replied on that one, she just looked down to the castle.   
'We have to attack by the gates, the walls are to high and we haven't the time to maked some things to get over.' Björn said, turning towards Ivar. 'What do you think?'  
'Now my opinion is needed.'  
'Ivar please.' Torhild sighed, getting tired of his going protest against this all.  
'Fine by me.' He just said before he turned his chariot around and cantered away. Torhild jumped on the chariot and gave him a promesing look.   
'What's wrong?' She asked him. But he just looked stubborn to the road back to the camp they had maked. 'Ivar.' She laid her hand on his shoulder and he exploded, pulling his horse to stop.  
'I'm sick of it Torhild, all of this.' He waved around. 'Since when do we bow down for some lord, since when do we battle a war that isn't ours. For your safety. You are viking Torhild, you should embrace dead, you shouldn't be afraid of it!' He hissed. Torhild nodded slowly before jumping from his chariot. 'I'm gonna kill him, if you want it or not.' He spitted.   
'You know Ivar, I can't stand you sometimes.' She reacted angry. He tilted his head and gave her a selfish grinn.   
'Embrace yourself for battle princess.'   
'Don't call me that.' She warned him. From where did this came? Ivar clenshed his teeth together, fingers gripping around his axe. 'Think good of what you gonna say next.' She said. He didn't say anything, he just drove of leaving her in de middle of nowere without a horse.

'Shield wall!' Björn yelled. Torhild felt the arrows hitting against her shield, some of them even pushing throught her shield. It was obvious that they were expecting them, what irritated her the most was the fact that they were first lines while lord Edgar and his men safely stood after the shield wall. Torhild looked aside to Ase and the other girls. 'Let's blow of some steam.' Ase smiled challenging. Battle always brought up the best in a viking. In the moment that the battering ram smached against the gate she could only think of battle, of what she had to do. She forgot Lord Edgar, the deal, she even forgot her meaningless fight with Ivar. And when those gates flew open after a few hits her brother yelled that one word.   
'Attack!' And they did. Last battle they were surpriced, outnumbered, now ... Torhild could see the fear in those soldiers eyes when a whole heathen army slipped in the village. Ase stayed close, just as Hvitserk did, all three of them fighting around each other.   
'Can you handle this love?' Hvitserk joked while copping of an arm from a soldier. Torhild kicked her shield against another and when he dropped down she putted her sword through his heart.  
'You have no idea,' she avoided another sword and dropped her shield to change it with her axe, fighting her body against him. 'how good this feels.' She finished her sentense. Hvitserk gave her a wild smile before they fight further. She saw her brother easily work his way through the crowed with Ubbe by his side, Ivar was nowhere to be found. Her arms didn't felt tired and she didn't get hurted except from some cuts and bruises when victory was that close by. The soldiers from lord Edgar started to mix them under the vikings, fighting against the enemy together. Hvitserk his sword hitted a shield and didn't came loose right away, getting him in a little danger with another soldier. She fighted her way to him, saving him on the last minut before bowing.   
'My princess.' He smiled amused. She had missed him, more than she admitted to. 'We should drink on this later.' He shouted. Torhild laughed, noticing that the soldiers in attack slowly reduced. Until there was no one left to fight. She took her breath and walked over a courtyard, pointing the tip of her sword up to a small group of other soldiers.   
'We aren't done yet.' Björn followed her eyes. The rest of the soldiers came on the courtyard when she noticed something else. A viking dropping down by the hand of a soldier from lord Edgar.   
'Björn, he is killing our men.' She yelled hoping he would hear it, turning around to look for Lord Edgar himself but facing something entirely different. She felt the sword throught her stomach, swift and without any mercy. Torhild gasped for air, holding her body straight by laying her hand on the soldiers shoulder. He was a soldier from lord Edgar and he smiled down on her while he pulled back his sword from her body, blood dripping from it as he gave her a little push. Torhild sank down on her knees, feeling for the wound she had, looking to the blood on hands.   
'Björn your sister!' Ase shouted. Torhild saw her friend, falling aside her, pulling her on her lap while she tried to close the wound by pushing her hand against it.   
'It's,' torhild tried to whisper but nothing really came over her lips.   
'Torhild.' Björn crouched down beside her, tilling her easily in his arms.   
'Find Ivar!' He commanded his other brother.   
'Lord Edgar.' She tried to say but noices of battle overcame every word she tried to say. Ase worked her way trought the enemy until they were of the courtyard. Torhild turned her head, facing the white stallion of Lord Edgar.   
'Bring her to safty.' He said like he really cared about her. But in the moments she tried to talk and waithed she felt every bit of live slipping through her body.   
'Stay with her, bring her to the settlement.' Björn said while he laid her down on some wood. Torhild opened her eyes a little, looking at Ase and getting short glimps of Ivar his eyes filled with fear. 'Go!' Björn yelled. She tried to stay awake but the blood loss and the pain just pulled her back in that dark black world.


	24. // 23 //

IVAR'S P.O.V

Itwas always harder to get his horse and chariot throught a fighting mass than it was for the vikings who had actual legs to fight with. But it didn't change a thing for him, he felt never more driven to kill an enemy than now. Althrough he wasn't that fixated on the battle they had with this kingdom, his eyes laid on the lord, following his every move while his axe swung by an enemy, and with enemy he wasn't only thinking about those soldiers from this kingdom, he also killed his soldiers. The rage he had bottled up came out all at once, his eyes gazing over the battlefield that crossed over streets and a courtyard. Some soldier pulled himself on his chariot, trying to attack him from behind. Ivar pulled his knife from his belt and reached behind, sticking the knife in his throat, hitting a major artery. He started laughing when the man fell from the chariot and grabbed to his throat. When he looked foward again he saw that most of the fight was over, he pulled his horse to a stop and gazed over the army from vikings and soldiers from Edgar. First thing he saw was that white stallion from the lord, cantering over dead bodies with not even a smear of blood, he could bet on it that the bastard did nothing in this battle except for waiting and claiming victory. His eyes traveled down to a viking who walked by. 'Give me that.' He pulled the bow and arrow out his hands and turned a little in his chariot, laid the arrow on the bow and pulled the string. He aimed, on that arrogant face of that Lord who sat with a smug grinn on his horse watching the last parts of battle.   
'Ivar.' Hvitserk panted.   
'Do you not see I'm bussy brother.' He hissed without loosing sight of his target.   
'It's Torhild.' Just as he wanted to loose that arrow that name came in and just with the tone Hvitserk said it he lost his interest in the lord. He lowered the bow and looked to his brother.  
'What is it?'   
'She is stabbed, we need you to get her out of here.' His horse starled when he hitted his reins against the animal, following Hvtiserk throught the crowd.

 

It couldn't be Torhild but when he saw her their was no denying that. Her skin turned pale and icecold while the blood leaved her body through the wound in her stomach. She hardly moved in her brothers arms, her dark hair braided ... just hanging there. Fear hitted him before he could even notice, she couldn't die, what would he do ... he looked up to Björn who started talking. 'Do everything you can to keep her alive.' Björn said to Ase before he looked up to Ivar.  
'Protect her.' And the only answer he could give was a little nod, words stuck in his throat while looking down to the girl who even meant more than his own mother. Ase jumped on the chariot and Ivar looked up in a second to see Lord Edgar smile. 'Go!' Björn commanded.

'Her polse is weak Ivar, we need to get faster.' Ase yelled from behind him. That little more pressure broke him entirely.   
'I can't actually ask my horse to fly all the way to the settlement.' He reacted with a sneer. But despite that ... he kicked his reins against his horse again, motivating the horse to get a little faster. Almost, they were almost there. She would live, he wouldn't call her a princess anymore and he wouldn't fight. The fight ... it couldn't be her last interaction with him, yelling at each other.   
'How can she loose so much blood and,'   
'Shut your mouth Ase.' He yelled in the wind.   
'Don't get angry with me.'   
'I will be a whole different kind of angry when she won't survive this ride, if she dies on your hands.' He threatened her. It was his inner instinct, protection himself meant protecting her. He killed his brother already, he couldn't loose her to. The settlement showed from over the small hill and his horse almost sounded relieved when it galloped over the little path between the houses. 'Get me a healer!' He commanded a woman who stood watch. The soldiers who stayed behind didn't ask much questions, the sight of an almost dead body on the back of his chariot clarified enough. He pulled his legs to one side while Ase pulled Torhild in her arms bringing her in one of the houses. His eyes only watched the blood, sunck in the wood of his chariot and it felt like his heart torn apart. It took him seconds before he pushed his body from the chariot and crawled inside. The healer arrived shortly after, immidiatly laying his hand on her forehead. Torhild didn't even reacted, her head just layed still, eyes shut. Ase unbuckled the protective gear Torhild wore and revealed the wound for the healer.   
'Get her on her side.' He commanded. Ase pulled her body up and Ivar could only see the wound on the back. It went right through her body, how could she survive that? The healer began to preparate some herbs and an ointment. 'She can't get a fever of this, if she lives through this the gods have blessed her, but this doesn't look good.'   
'If you can't heal her I nail you to a cross like the Christian lord would do.' He reacted in anger. Ase gave him an warning look but his eyes already traveled back to her pale face. The reaction on the ointment startled her, eyes flushed open and her breathing became more unsteady.   
'It was,' Torhild tried, he moved closer, carefully layed his hand on her forehead while she drifted away a little again.   
'Don't talk.'   
'Let her.' Ivar murmuled.   
'Lord Edgar.' Torhild whispered. Her hand shaked so hard when she wanted to touch the wound. Ivar followed her movement before it felt still again.   
'Nothing more that I can do.' The healer said before he wrapped bandages around her stomach.  
'Keep guard.' Ivar whispered to Ase. She sighed but nodded, squeezing Torhild hand before she walked out. The healer did to and Ivar looked back to Torhild, dropping his anger, dropping his guard and pressing his lips against her temple. 'I'm sorry for what I did and will do.' He said with a soft broken voice, looking at her eyes who closed again. He stroke his fingers over her hair while one tear slipped from the corner of his eye. 'I'm gonna kill him, I'm gonna kill them all and there is nobody really who can stop me.' The left over from his anger fadded in the sadness he felt. He let his forehead fall against her shoulder, fear pushing his emotions from one way to another. 'I can't loose you Torhild, I can't loose the only person I love.' In the grief of that moment he grabbed a small wooden box that just stood there and throwed it throught the room, yelling his anger and grief out before falling into tears against her body again.

Two days before he saw the heathen army return. He sat before the house, sharpening his knife with no sign or a trace of emotions. Björn and the other brothers walked in front and Ivar saw no sign of that white stallion. 'Is she still alive?' Hvitserk asked as soon as they were in range. Ivar looked up, almost uninterested in what he ask.   
'Where is Lord Edgar?' He asked Björn in return.   
'Torhild?'   
'No no,' he held his knife up, stopping Björn from walking in. 'Where is Lord Edgar brother.' He asked again, impatient.   
'Behind, we could go, he was finishing the deal. If you don't let me pass,' but before Björn could finish his sentence Ivar pulled his knife away.   
'She is alive.' He replied, nodding inside. Nothing changed in two days, Torhild didn't got a fever but she didn't waked up either. Ase walked through the army and crouched beside him.  
'Lagertha arrived.' She whispered. Ivar looked up to her, the plan he had, spreading with a small grinn over his face.   
'Good, I need to talk to her.' He said.   
'I make your chariot ready.' She nodded before walking away. Ivar looked to his knife, pulled it up to eye level, turning it against the sun. It was Torhild her knife and he was planning on using it to kill a lord and a king.

Ase road a horse before his chariot, leading him the way in the woods, far out of sight from any scout from king Aethelwulf. When they drove aside the river he could spott six vikings ships, good enough for a hugh backup, the backup they needed. Lagertha stood surround by her shieldmaidens on a open spot. She turned around, her face flattened immidiatly when she maked eye contact with him. 'Queen Lagertha, how nice from you to finally show up.' He greeted her sarcastic.   
'Where are my son and daugher, I expected at least one of them.' She demaned. Ivar crossed his arms over the seat, losing his grip over the reins a little while he looked at her. He felt bad for being so arrogant again but it was his only way to cope with the emptiness that Torhild left behind in his body.   
'Björn is just back from battle and Torhild,'   
'She is injured.' Interuppted Ace him. He gave her a warning look but she ignored him.   
'How bad?' Lagertha asked. It didn't do much on his expressions but he was glad to see that her eyes looked concerned in a moment.   
'Pretty bad, she was stabbed in her stomach, slept for over two days now.' Ase explained. Lagertha looked to the water, staring in the distant while she progrecced the news she got.   
'The gods are testing her.' Ivar said almost softly. Lagertha looked up to him again.   
'Why are you here?' She asked. Yes he hated her, he still wanted to kill her for what she did to his mother but there stood someone in his way and he couldn't bare the thought of Torhild not speaking to him because he killed her mother.   
'Good you ask. I need you to come with me and kill a lord, and a king, now we are on it.' He said almost cheerfull. Lagertha looked aside to Ase who shrugged.   
'Why?'   
'Your son and daughter made a deal with king Aelthelwulf, we get Torhild back and let his soldiers in our settlement, we do his bidding and in return he doesn't attack us. But then he send a Lord who ruined our whole settlement, leaded uss to battle he could easily win himself and gave his men the command to kill Torhild,' he felt still for a moment, watching Lagertha intesly. 'So, you're in?' he asked in the end.   
'I'm in.' Ase said. Ivar gave her a small grinn before he looked back to Lagertha.   
'Good, first I wanna see Björn. If we come up with a plan I will do it with him, not with you.'  
'Hush, I'm the only one who kept your daughter safe all those weeks.' He smiled dark. Lagertha lifted her chin, not willing to give in to him. He laughed softly and shook his head. 'I will get your precious son.' He annouched, guiding his horse back to the settlement.   
'Ivar.' Lagertha said. He stopped and turned around, frowning his eyebrows.   
'Is she gonna survive?' She aksed. He thought of Torhild her pale skin, her unsteady breath.   
'Is for the gods to decide.' He answered with a little more emotion than he wanted to. He turned around again, drove of, back to the settlement, back to the girl he loved ...


	25. // 24 //

Some moments she thought she would make it, other moments she just wandered around in the darkness. Torhild had no idea how long she was like this when she finally opened her eyes, squeezing them together when the light blinded her sight. Her body felt heavy, her throat dry and muscles screaming in pain with every move she tried to make. So she just laid there, staring at the ceiling trying to get her tired mind around the situation she was in. The last thing she could remember was that soldier, pushing his sword through her body. It was a vivid memory and she felt it all over again. She couldn't warn her brother over who had stabbed her, a man from lord Edgar. She didn't even know if he survived the attack. If anybody had survived it. In those awake moments she just tried to put some time in her surrounding. Her eyes gazed over the wooden ceiling, telling her she was in the settlement. She had no idea how she came here but she was just glad that it was here and not with that lord of the king. She turned her head, looking in the blazing flames of the fireplace, keeping her warm in the bed. When she lifted her arm if felt heavy, stiff but she managed to feel her hair, her face, the bandages around her stomach. The rest of the room was empty, except for some herbs and an empty chair there wasn't a sign of life. So she took it on herself, pushing her body up, gasping in pain when she moved her upper body a little. She got so far to put her naked feet on the ground, scared of the loneliness she was in. It broke her apart, the uncertainty of the situation. She needed to get up but as soon as she tried to push her body up the pain and heaviness of her body pulled her down again. 'Torhild.' Torhild looked up to Hvitserk who stood in the doorway. 'What are you doing?' He asked, his eyes uncertain, gazing over het body like he didn't believed she was awake.   
'I'm,' her voice sounded raspy, hardly understandable.   
'No, hush love.' He walked over, crouched before her, shaking his head. 'You need to rest, please Torhild.' He whispered, cupping a part of her face but she burst into tears. 'Lay down.' He helped her with the softness he always had around her. She laid down again, groaning in the pain she had. Hvisterk looked at her and smiled caring. 'Just away and already on your way to battle again,' he smiled down on her. Torhild looked at him, in his dark eyes ... but it weren't the eyes she was longling for. 'We weren't sure if you would wake again.' He whispered, stroking a strand of hair out of her face.   
'How long?' She barely could ask.   
'Little more than a week. The healer saw it positive, the longer you laid down, the better you would heal so,' he shrugged, looking at her stomach.   
'Lord,'   
'Alive and well.' Hvitserk itterupted her to spare some breath and energy. But it didn't really help, how could that traitor still be alive? Did nobody got her message? Hvitserk noticed her troubled eyes and laid his hands around hers, pressing his lips against it. 'Torhild, don't worry about him. We know what he did, we just can't do anything right now.' He assured her. Why not? What was so hard on killing somebody who tried to kill her?   
'Why?' She asked softly, looking at him in despare, anger. Hvitserk sighed while he shook his head again.   
'You don't have to be worried. We explain when you are better, for now just get yourself some energy again.'   
'The others?' He rolled his eyes after that question.   
'You are as stubborn as my brother. Everyone is fine, the one a little more than the other.' He smiled. What does he meant by that. She narrowed her eyes questioningly. But it was a wild guess, he wasn't talking about the physical state of the others, he was talking about Ivar.   
'Where is he?' She asked, still hoarse. Hvitserk looked towards the door, like Ivar could crawl in any moment.   
'He is with your mother, yes, she arrived.' He answered the little sparkle in her eyes. That was the best news she had in a while, her mother finally arrived. 'He will be back any moment. Let's say he missed you.' Hvitserk winked. His positivity really cheered her up a little. But despite everything she felt the tiredness already drop down on her again. 'Rest, when you wake up your brother and Ivar will be here and they will explain you everything.' Hvitserk pressed a kiss against her hand again, carefully laid it down on the bed again. He gave her a long look before he leaved, letting her behind in the emptyness of her own thoughts.

When Torhild waked again she wasn't the only one in the room. Ivar sat in the chair, his legs resting on the bed, his head a little tilted, breathing rather loudly while he lived the good life in his dreams. She instantly felt the tears started running again and actually ... she didn't want to wake him up. 'Ivar.' She whispered. He couldn't be that far away because his eyes flew open in a instant. Bleu eyes looking at her with the biggest relief she ever saw with him. He just sat there, watching her when his mind tried to get in to the situation. Yes, she was alive and breathing, something he had to process for a moment. 'Ivar.' She snapped him right out of his thoughts. He pulled his legs from the bed and hopped over from the chair to right aside her. And as soon she felt his dumb running away her tears she closed her eyes. His warmth, his strenght, she couldn't believe she had slept for over a week but now, she knew what she had missed the most.   
'Don't do that ever again.' He whispered, pushing his forehead against her temple. 'I missed you. I thought I lost you.' If was like he dropped all of his fear on her. In that moment she knew for sure she was his weakness, the only thing that could bring the great Ivar the Boneless down. Torhild still had her eyes closed, enjoying his warm breath against her skin. It was still for moments, her breathing became steady, peacefull almost. 'Torhild?' He asked. She opened her eyes and turned her head a little only to look in those deep blue eyes of his. He stroke the last of her tears away and she closed her eyes again.   
'Why didn't you kill him?' She softly asked, her head still so close to his, his body warming hers by laying next to her.   
'Don't.' He protested. When she looked at him again she could she his tempering rage already brewing in his eyes again.   
'Tell me.' She insisted.   
'Torhild no,' he reacted in anger, on instinct. 'I don't want to be angry, I'm tired of being angry, I'm tired of not getting my way in this. The only place I can be myself is with you. Please.' He said tired, almost begging for some peace in his head. Torhild knew that she missed a lot, but this version of Ivar was even new to her. She lifted her hand and stroke the short cut of his head.   
'I'm afraid to die.' Torhild confessed. In that passed week she floated between life and dead, except for her dreaming there was really nothing in the darkness and she was scared to go there again.   
'Don't be, I will protect you and even if you're in Valhalla, I will be there to.' He promised her, placing his lips against hers. She melted under his touch, his kiss but the pain denied her further enjoyment of the moment. He smiled softly against her lips before he pulled away. His eyes went sortly to the door, like he was thinking about leaving or staying.   
'If you need to be the fearless Ivar The Boneless again, than go.' Her voice cracked under it and she slowly sighed, what cause her much more pain.   
'What can I do to ease your pain?' He asked.   
'Stay? Being almost dead makes you afraid of everything.'   
'As long as you won't be afraid of me.' He replied. She wanted to smile but it didn't really worked out. He laid his head aside her, his hand soflty warm the skin between her bandages and waist.  
'Don't grow all soft on me Ivar.' She whispered, already closing her eyes again.   
'To late.' He murmured. Torhild absorbed his touch, the softness of his breathing, the warmth of his body. It was just enough, just enough to get her in a dreamless sleep again.


	26. // 25 //

'I will pray that she wakes up soon.' Torhild her eyes slowly opened, still a little dizzy from her sleep. She slept to much, a sign that her body hardly was recovered.   
'And I will pray for you if she don't.' Ivar replied the earlier voice. Who was he talking to? She forced her body up, squeezing her eyes together when she felt the wound protest on her movements. Torhild was tired of laying down despite the fact that she just was awake for twentyfour hours. Aside Hvitserk and Ivar she hadn't saw anybody. She forced her body in the same position as yesterday, the cold against her feet chased the goosbumbs over her arms. She wrapped an arm over her stomach, trying to ignore the pain she felt, the certain nausea running through her body. There wasn't a replie on what Ivar had said, only the distinct voice of hooves and what sounded like a lot of manpower behind it. Torhild grabbed the wall, pushing her body up, stading still a little to catch her breath.   
'Come on.' She muttered against herself. But then she felt it, somebody staring at her in the back. She slowly turned around to look at Ivar. 'Who was outside?' She asked, hoping he wouldn't make a scene over the fact she stood up.   
'None of your concerne. Back.' He pointed towards the bed. She slowly turned around, her hand still on the place the wound was.   
'Don't keep me in the dark. Who was it?' She instisted. He looked impatient but it wasn't in the good way, it was like he was going to kill somebody with it.   
'Don't test my patient, there is but so little I can handle right now. Get back in the bed.' He said with a low warning voice. And it was that little of low warning in his voice that got her back to the bed. She knew Ivar the best, she knew when not to argue. When she carefully sat down again she saw that the wound bleeded through the bandage. 'See.' He turned around towards the door again. 'Ase, in, help her.' He commanded Ase who appeared in the doorway. 'Don't mess it up.' He warned her before crawling out. Ase looked after Ivar before she walked in, rolling her eyes.   
'I could kill him.' She sighed before she pulled a bright smile on her lips and walked over to the bed. 'I'm so glad that you are awake.' Folding her hands shortly around Torhild's hand before she looked to the bandages. 'You need a new one.' She pointed out, getting everything together. Tolhild rested on her elbows, looking down to her own stomach where Ase slowly took the bandages away. She swallowed when she saw the wound and she even felt in on the other side. Blood dripped over her stomach down and Ase carefully dabbed away.   
'Was he so bad?' Torhild asked. Ase looked up, her long black hair braided into a knot, still wearing her warriors outfit.   
'Ubbe said that he was different when he killed Sigurd, he was distant afterwards but was still angry, sarcastich. Now he was,' She felt silent and sighed again. Torhild studied her friends face eager to get more answers to her question. Ivar seemed distracted, he was diffrent, a little off maybe. 'We didn't saw him much. We thought he would kill half the village but he didn't he was here or nowhere. Still, not so sarcastic as usual and less focust. But don't worry, he is his old back since he left you sleeping yesterday.' With her last words she rolled her eyes. Torhild flinched a little when Ase smeared some of the ointment on the wound. 'Sorry.' She said. Torhild shook her head and layed back again staring to the ceiling.   
'What did I miss? Why is nobody telling me?'   
'You missed nothing, that's it. You waked up on the right time, the fun will start tonight.' She answered with a promesing smile. Torhild felt some excitment only to be remind afterwards that she barly could stand and just had to have some fun in this bed.   
'And my mother?' She asked after a while, feeling how Ase put some clean bandages on its place. But before Ase could reply on that the brotherhood stapped in. Ase lowered her shirt and helped Torhild to sit up a little.   
'Sister.' Björn said with a hopefull smile, carefully embracing her.   
'You still seem kind of pale Torhild.'   
'What did you expect brother, that she would be jumping around again.' Ivar hissed towards his oldest brother. Ubbe gave her a promesing look and sat down in the chair while Hvitserk came sit aside her on the bed.   
'I'm fine, or I will be when you tell me whats going on.' She comforted them, looking from the one to the other, ending with her brother. There were so much mixed signals among them, Ubbe looked relax, while Ivar was angry about something. Hvitserk was his usual charming self, Ase was rather curious and Björn, he switched to often looks with Ivar ... and it weren't good looks. 'Please, or I walk out myself and find out.' She pointed towards the door.   
'Lord Edgar isn't dead yet.'   
'I figured that out, looking to his face.' She nodded towards Ivar his angry glare towards her brother. 'But why? If I see that bastard I kill him myself, wounded or not. You know he was the one who stabbed me right?'   
'Yes Torhild but,'   
'King Aelthelwulf was here with a large force of his own to celebrate the victory. We couldn't do it.' Ubbe intterupted Björn, cutting to the case. She gave him a thankfull look.   
'Mother is here, you have a heathen army, you could take them all and than just walk his kingdom in.' She turned back to her brother.   
'For all the gods, finally, somebody who understands.' Ivar yelled out. Wasn't strange that he would do something like that, especially after what happened to her.   
'Lagertha didn't agree. She wanted to waith until he was away, taking back the settlement first before we take Aelthelwulf.' Ubbe explained. Torhild tried to make herself comfortable without giving signs of pain, what was pretty hard to do. But now they said it ... she recognized the voice from somewhere, just after she waked up. King Aethelwulf would pray for her ... now Ivar his words maked sense.   
'He is gone now right?' Björn nodded. 'What are we watching for?' She followed. Hvitserk magical pulled an apple in sight and started to eat, amused by the whole conversation and her fight power.   
'We take back the settlement tonight, mother will force the soldiers back in, slaughter them when they least expect it, we are going to kill the soldiers who sleep.' Her brother explained, changing short glares with Ivar.   
'What is going on?' She asked, pointing towards the two of them.   
'He wants to use you as bait.' Ivar said with a sharp voice. Torhild opened her mouth but nothing came out while she slowly turned her head towards her brother.   
'It isn't bait. We need somebody who can keep Lord Edgar occupied.' He protested against the words of Ivar. Even better ... like she didn't was just stabbed by one of his men, her brother wanted that she talked to him.   
'Do you even now what your asking.' She asked with a low voice, looking back up to him after she stared at the wall the whole time.   
'I know, he stabbed you but Torhild, he has to have some focus. If he walks out, suspect something than the whole effort will maybe for nothing.' Björn explained. He maked his point but she wasn't willing to sit before that bastard of a lord while she remembered the feeling of getting stabbed all over again. That was why Ivar was so angry, he didn't agreed.   
'I'm not going in alone.' She finally agreed with the plan.   
'I stay.' Ase smiled reassuring.   
'Me to.' Ubbe nodded. Torhild took a slow breath and looked back to her brother.   
'You can't kill him.' He warned her. She smiled, a distant dark smile.   
'I wasn't planning to.' She murmured, looking towards Ivar who pulled the corner of his mouth up, satisfied by the look she just gave him.

Some slave had braided her hair, got her in one of those fancy dresses so she had some attitude and power over all the pain she felt. It was the only comfort she had, her self confident had slinked a hugh amount after waking up. 'I will be allright, Ase and Ubbe are with me.' Torhild tried to reassure Ivar of the situation while she sat on the egde of the bed, trying out the movements of her body.   
'Oh shut up Torhild.' Ivar reacted angry. She wrapped her fingers around his chin, jerking his head her way, looking angry.   
'I will let him suffer so much in the idea that he will walk out alive before you get the pleasure of killing him. I want you to kill him, there is nobody more capable in that than you.' She promised him. His anger drifted away a little, maked place for that intens look, the darkness edging his blue eyes. 'You just have to make me one promise.' She got further. Her fingers let his chin loose, stroking his jawline while she drowned in the confident darkness of his eyes. That was the Ivar she needed now, the ruthless one, the one who didn't knew mercy. She needed some of that.  
'What is that?' He asked.   
'Make him suffer.'   
'For you,' he felt silent, pulling her face closer, pressing his lips against hers. Not so tender, not so sweet but a kiss that went deep, a kiss only Ivar could give. She felt overpowered by it. 'Everything.' He whispered. She opened her eyes, looked at the smug smile around his lips and she smiled back, hardly capable of leaving his eyes when Ase and Ubbe walked in.   
'Ready?' He asked not paying any attention on what was going on between her and his younger brother.   
'Good luck.' She said to Ivar. He just leaned back, his self confident almost taking power of his body and it was Torhild who gave it to him, just as he gave her enough to handle Lord Edgar. Torhild had to support on Ase and Ubbe to make it to the great hall. Her body felt already tired but she tried to put it away.   
'I walk myself in.' She said when they arrived before the great hall.   
'You sure?' Ase asked. Torhild pulled her arms back from their shoulders and laid one on her stomach, lifting her head and taking a slow deep breath.   
'I'm ready. Stay close.' She said with a short look towards the two of them, they both nodded supportive. Ase pushed the door open to the great hall and Torhild walked in. Her steps were a little unsteady and shaky but she managed to get herself on one straight line in the room. Lord Edgar sat on the throne, the throne that belonged to her and her brother. Ubbe walked aside her, close enough to help her if needed. But she felt quite good, especially when she saw his shocked look. Her eyes didn't show any emotion, her appearance distant and almost cold.  
'Princess Torhild.' He stammered.   
'Lord Edgar, we need to talk.' She almost itterupted him, placing her dominance above his. Björn was right, she was the bait that they needed and she felt more than saticfied with his look and the idea of Ivar killing him ...


	27. // 26 //

Lord Edgar wasn't sure how to handle her. He didn't say much except for a short greeting and looking back at her ... probably thinking what the meaning was of this. 'What? You thought I wouldn't survive?' She asked him. It was hard to put so much effort in looking strong and confident when she felt only pain. The lord came from the throne and walked over to her, a soft smile spreading over his lips.   
'I'm glad you survived but you don't look so good princess.'   
'I'm fine.' She reacted immidiatly. Ase followed her to the throne and Torhild was glad that she could sit down for a moment. The soft fabrics of the animalskins maked it comfortabel for her, giving her enough strenght to look back at him.   
'I guess your brother doesn't know you are here?' He turned around, facing her again with Ubbe at his side. The oldest brother was alert, his hand resting on his belt where he easily could pull his knife.   
'No.' She answered. Little did he know that her brother currently was taking back the settlement. Lord Edgar nodded and smiled again, like he was pleased over what she just said.   
'I like you Torhild, your mind works the same way as mine. I guess you're not here to talk battlewounds?' His green eyes amused scanning hers. Torhild lifted her chin a little and looked down at him.   
'I want to make a deal.' She announched. His eyebrow kicked up, surpriced.   
'We have already a deal.'   
'No, I have a deal with king Aethelwulf, not with you.' She corrected him. He nodded, approvingly, before he putted some fingers forward in a jesture for her to get further on the subject. 'Simple, you let us go, unharmed, every last one of uss and I give you the promise to never come back again.' She explained. It was nothing more than a diversion but she was also a little curious about what he was going to think of this. Torhild had many journeys to come and England wasn't the only place to raid so ... she didn't have to come back.   
'You are in no position to make that deal, your not the leader of your kind.' He said with a small grin, his eyes narrowed. He was right, she wasn't in the right position.   
'I will, when I am queen.'   
'Your gonna kill your king or queen back home? Who says the people will follow you?' He asked. Torhild looked towards Ubbe who followed it all with a little amusment in his eyes. Even Ivar would love this subject, or at least the part where she should kill her mother for power ... not that it was the plan, Torhild wasn't out for power. 'Besides, isn't it a Ragnarssons who should rule?' He asked, looking aside to Ubbe.   
'I could marry him, we rule together, the people would followed two such leaders.' She pointed towards Ubbe. He smiled by the thought of it, offcourse he smiled. The sons of Ragnar weren't strangers to marry proposals. Ubbe already married Margrethe and Hvitserk offered his loyalty already once before to Torhild. But her words maked him thinking, clearly ... so she let him. 'I can tell everybody what you did, starting a war where you certainly in would die. Or I can go home, raid aside the mediterranean sea and never come back.' She clearified the deal for him a little further. He was still in the thought that he could get out of here, that nobody knew what he had done.   
'Who says they are willing to believe you?'   
'They will,' Ubbe reacted, giving him a short grinn. 'Trust me.' Torhild give Ubbe a short smile, trying to keep her body in such a position that the pain was a little easier to handle.   
'So you go home, kill however is in charge, marry him and never come back here?' He setted the deal a little more in place, Torhild nodded.   
'You get your land back and never have to be concerned about vikings raiding your lands again. Cause I think that thats why you are here, we are on your land.' She pointed to the ground underneath her feet. He started passing around while he tried to progress this information. Torhild let her eyes fall on the five soldiers who sat on the table, following the conversation intensly before she looked back at that man ... she couldn't bare to look at him any longer. The silence was strong, even from outside there wasn't a sound. What was only good news, that meant that her brother and Ivar killed the people without sounding any alarms.   
'I don't believe this princess. Who says that you aren't gonna go home to get more men and later come back. You are not gonna tell me that you don't had a plan to take me down, or take this settlement back.' Lord Edgar said after that long silence.   
'I always had a plan.' She reacted, impatient. Lord Edgar smiled, a smug smile that chases the goodebumbs over her tired body. 'And who says I need to get more people, maybe they are already here.' She shrugged nonchalant. Just as he wanted to speak the dubble door from the great hall pushed open and her brother came in, a sword covered in blood, his eyes hunting those of the lord.   
'So this is it?' The lord asked. Torhild saw Hvitserk walk in with Ivar crawling beside him. She changed a quick look with Ivar who setted his attention rather fast on the lost. King Harald and Halfdan turning their attention two the five soldiers who already jumped up to defend their lord. But it was an easy game, their were more vikings in the room than Christians. And then her mother came in, fierce like she always was. Her blond hair braided while she shoved her sword back in her belt before she looked up. Torhild pushed her body out the throne, her hand against her stomach as like she wanted to support her injuries   
'This is it.' Björn smiled. The lord pulled his sword pointing it towards Torhild. Despite the fact that she was just out of reach, Ase pulled her axe to protect her. Even   
'I could kill her.' He said. The pressure of the situation maked him handle irrational.   
'No you won't.' Lagertha began, stepping to aside her son. Torhild sowly sat down again not been able to hold her body up. Ivar crawled over the wooded floor until he was aside her throne. She felt more secure with him around, not that she had something against Ase but Ivar was a better judge of character and he knew Torhild.   
'And who are you?'   
'Lagertha, queen of Kattegat, mother of Björn Ironsside and Torhild.' She presented herself with so much power that the lord knew immidiatly that his end was near. 'Did you really thought that we vikings wouldn't find a way, that we are like your christian soldiers and just do what is asked from us? You came in our homes and took our things, our rights, you attacked my daughter and for that my wrath will be sweet.' She explained him.   
'Didn't the princess warned you.' Ase followed. Torhild looked aside to Ase who looked at this with a confident strong smile, it were the woman who had the power now and it held her straight for a moment.   
'I won't die on the hands of a pagan woman who has been here for minuts.'   
'You won't,' Björn smiled pointing towards his sister. 'She will deside your faith.' He announched. Torhild took a carefull breath, relieved that her brother gave her the change to do this by herself. She wasn't in a position to kill somebody, how much she wanted to kill him. In the time she was awake and resting she had thought of all the ways she could make him suffer, the viking ways and the christian ways. Maybe she could nail him on a cross, the possibilities were numerous. Torhild gave her brother a thankfull look before she looked back to the lord.  
'The gods have decided your path, your faith is fixed.' She whispered before she nodded towards King Harald. Halfdan and Harald killed those last five soldiers without any trouble so only the lord was the one left.   
'King Aethelwulf will hear of this princess en you will wish that you were nailed on that cross when you had the change.'   
'I will not be afraid of you Christian souls!' She shouted, her body in reflex out of her seat before she felt the pain and all the color pulled out her face, her hand reached to the wound. Ivar grabbed her by her arm and pulled her back in the seat. Torhild tried to suppress the tears while she looked up to him again. Ace came forward and pushed the lord on his knees before her feet. He started laughing, loud and amused, not afraid of his own dead that was coming.   
'You are already afraid.' He chuckled.   
'Ivar.' She hissed through her pain. Ivar, with his arms crossed over the arm of her chair looked up to her. She met his bleu eyes, burning in rage and a desire to kill that men for her. 'Bloodeagle him.' She said to him. Ivar turned his head, resting it on his arms again while he looked to the lord with that wicked smile.   
'You will wish you never crossed us.' He said. 'Get him out, lets give the gods a feast.' Ivar commanded Ase. She pulled the lord up and pulled him out, king Harald and Halfdan following. As soon as that lord was away Torhild dropped her attitude. She pulled her hand away and looked at the blood. 'You should rest.' Ivar whispered.   
'I wan't to see him suffer and die.' She reacted softly, looking down at him before she looked to her mother and the others. Lagertha was watching her and Ivar intensly. 'I'm glad you're here mother.' Torhild smiled tired. Lagertha snapped out of her staring and walked over to her daughter, softly embracing her before she looked down to her hand covered in blood.   
'I'm glad that I could help but by the looks of it your are already a queen on your own.'   
'I couldn't do it without Björn and the others.' She replied, looking down to Ivar as first.   
'A good queen knows when to advise the people close to her, she also knows when to rest. You have to take it easy Torhild, go rest.' Her last words were concerned, motherly. Torhild grabbed her mothers hand and squeezed softly in it.   
'Thanks mother, but I want to see him die.' She said a little more confident, stubborn. Her body had to hold on a little longer and then she would sleep, hours if needed until she was enough healed to take on Aethelwulf.


	28. // 27 //

IVAR'S P.O.V

 

She looked terrible, like she was sick or something. Her skin was pale, eyes shouting exhaustion, her body shivered in pain and cold with every move she maked. Torhild shouldn't be here, her red dress covered the blood she lost but there were signs enough, she needed to rest. That little stubbornness she showed in her brown dark eyes she had from him, or at least, he had told her to be stubborn about the things she wanted. And just like him, she wanted to see that lord die. So he wasn't so concerned about Torhild in the moment when he had much brighter things to look forward to. 'You sure you can handle this?' Björn asked, crouching besides Ivar. Ivar turned his head and looked to the little amusement in Björn his eyes.   
'I told you before, I imagine myself sitting.' He answered coldly before looking back towards Lord Edgar who sat between two wooden poles on his knees, hands tied to each one of them.  
'Go have fun.' Björn said with a little grin. Ivar smiled and crawled towards the lord.   
'You must have heard of king Aelle his dead?' He asked, most cheery about his situation on this right moment. Lord Edgar looked at him, for a split second, before he looked back up. 'I take that as a yes.' Ivar nodded. The beacons of fire were the only things brighting this night while drums filled the air with songs for the gods. The whole settlement stood around the wooden platform, a whole heathen army was wathing. It wasn't something that Ivar noticed, he only noticed that lord and the fact that he could kill him for her. Torhild sat down, Lagertha and Ase on each side of her, her eyes hardly the power to concentrate them on the ritual. Ivar crawled to the back of the lord, his brothers helping him on a piece of wood so he easily had access to the lords back. Lagertha came to him, handing a knife.   
'Torhild wanted me to give you this.' She said on a neutral voice. He didn't look to the queen he hated so much for killing his mother but he took the knife and looked at it. It was his promise and hers to kill a lord and a king with it and he felt his attraction towards her grew stronger with things like this.

In vikings ways the Blood Eagle was a horrible way to die but the men who had to get one did it with pride. This lord ... Ivar could almost smell the fear on him with every second he came closer to his own dead. Being nailed to a cross must be painfull, but carving an eagle in his back, chopping out ribs to get to his lungs was a much worse way to die. Björn nodded and walked to the front of the lord.   
'I hope you hold on to the end and I hope you screams reach to your king so he knows that his dead will be coming soon.' Björn said sattisfied, taking a deep breath before he stand with his mother and sister. Ubbe tore of the clothes that the lord stil wore before it was Ivar his turn. He felt so much on that moment, putting his knife of the lower of that lords back while pulling it up, cutting his way through his flesh. The lord started shaking, holding down his screams while the cut grew longer and longer. Ivar couldn't resist a smile, a sick amused smile that would scare half this army. The blood started to flow down from his back, dripping down on the wooden platform. He felt it, the warmth of the blood over his hand and it only maked him want to do more. When he cutted his way throught the flesh, with Torhild her knife he looked aside to his brother who gave him an axe instead. The lord held his head up, being proud about still breathing in the moment. He held the axe up, looking down on the back before the blade of the axe carved himself in. The lord schouted out and the drums got a little higher in their songs. The blood splached up, covering Ivar his face and he almost laughed out loud about. In the second cut with the axe he saw the lord his arms relax a little, wat meant that he was giving up, unconscious or already dead, he hoped not the last. Ivar looked to the back of the head from lord Edgar that trew himself backwards to yell in pain to the sky. Ivar looked at Torhild for a second only to see that she looked back at him before she closed her eyes, like she maked peace with something. He pulled his axe back, reached into the flesh to grab a rib and pulled it with a loud crack out of his position. And on that moment the lord his muscles tensed before every bit of life slowly fadded away out of his body. A perfect blood eagle, every rib he cracked to the open sky so everybody could see him on the in and outside, a present to his gods and a statement to every soldier, king or lord in this kingdom, a viking never surrendered. Despite he was dead, Ivar maked it complete by pulling out the lungs in the ending before he looked to the sky, to his gods. 'We have the settlement back.' Björn announched, jumping on the platform and grabbing the hair of the dead lord. 'We avenged the lives we lost, let's feast!' He yelled and everybody started to rumble in the excitment of this night. Ivar licked the blood from his lips and looked aside to his brothers.   
'You want to do that again, aren't you?' Hvitserk asked. The almost possessed smile spreaded over his lips, he dipped his fingers in the blood of the lord and blessed both his brothers by leaving a smear of blood on their faces.   
'Let the gods be generous to uss all brothers.' He whispered. Ubbe smiled and looked aside to his younger brother Hvitserk.   
'Let's feast.' Hvitserk announched. Ivar nodded before he looked back to the blood eagle he had made, it was magnificent.

He sat before the house of Torhild when the sun came up, carving a piece of wood with Torhild her knife, his eyes regular going back to the blood eagle he made out of lord Edgar. From where he sat he didn't have a clear vieuw, but the memory in his mind was just enough. 'I didn't saw you on the feast.' Ivar looked slowly up to Lagertha, not verry intrested in her being around him. So he looked down to his carving again, waited a little before answering. He liked it, to taunt her just long enough, test her patient, it was the only way that he could make her suffer.   
'Somebody needs to keep an eye on the princess.' He replied with a neutral voice. Torhild didn't waked from the feast, she slept the whole night through it. Nobody had attented to her wound because she was to tired and had to much pain already. It took Ivar an couple of hours before his mindset came back to normal, being in the rush of blood and killing somebody did still more than loving her. But after that, he didn't leaved her side.   
'And you doing that from out here?'   
'You wouldn't appreciate it when I would be in there.' He reacted, pointing with the knife over his shoulder in the house. He looked up, only to see Lagertha staring back at him. 'Spit it out.' He said impatient. She had to say something, it was that clear, so she could better say it right now, where Torhild wasn't around to hear it.   
'I asked her to stay away from you. Tonight showed yet again that your mind doesn't work the way it should. You had to much joy in killing others, you dissability makes you dangerous.' She began. He looked at her with narrowed eyes, the point of his knife pointing her way.   
'And yet she isn't afraid. And my mind workes just fine. If you think I'm a monster than it is because everybody maked me one. You killed my mother, don't ever think I forget that.' He replied, his anger already taking it's way up in his body.   
'Björn told me you kept her safe.'   
'Björn is growing some brains for a change, good for him.'   
'Don't speak of him that way.' She hissed, losing her temper in a little moment. Ivar smiled sarcastic, she was more upset about him being around Torhild than he thought. She needed some time so Ivar looked down to the carvings again, not really knowing what he was carving. It took Lagertha several minuts, minuts in wich he didn't look back at her again. 'I'm thanksfull for what you did Ivar but I'm here now, I will keep her safe.'   
'You don't need to convince me queen, you need to convince her. I'm loyal to your daugher, that coming from me,' he give her a quick look before he looked down again. He never was loyal to anybody but himself, he didn't trust anybody, it was just only Ivar and himself. But Torhild changed that, like she always could change him a little.   
'Do you love her?' Lagertha asked. Ivar stopped carving and looked slowly up to Lagertha. But before he could answer he heard a couch, followed by the groans of pain.   
'She is awake.' He pointed his knife back at the house. Lagertha didn't asked again, she just wachted him carving the wood.   
'Mother.' Björn greeted her, looking in between her and Ivar. 'We want to send a message king Aethelwulf, deliver Lord Edgar his body.' He began without asking what the problem was. Ivar sighed and rolled onto his stomach and crawled inside the house, pauzing a moment in the doorway.   
'Don't give Aethelwulf a reason to prepare his army. We are in the ellement of surprice, just saying.' He advided them calm. How much he would love to give a message, it was far more important to keep it a surprice.

Torhild was trying to get her bandages off when he crawled in. 'Don't.' He reacted on her movements. She looked over her shoulder, her skin still pale but her expressions a little more rested. She managed to get the dress out this night, leaving her with hardly something of clothes, a skirt and her top half rolled up so she could get to the wounds.   
'It started bleeding again.' She protested. He pulled himself on to the bed and looked how she got the bandages off, leaving her skin with a massive would on the back of her body. His eyes looked at the wound before he placed his body up a little behind her. 'I'm not getting better.'  
'You are. You are awake, that counts for something. This needs time Torhild, it's only little more than a week.' He reacted calm, because she was upset.   
'I don't have time.' She hissed, throwing her bangages on the ground. He grabbed her wrist and looked at her.   
'Will you calm down for a moment.' He reacted. She looked over her shoulder towards him, giving warning glares towards her wrist. He studied the anger and impatient in her eyes while she only looked angry back. But the longer they looked at each other the more she dropped her guard a little. It was the other way around this time, Torhild was troubled while he, because of the blood eagle, was the steady one of the two. He lost his grip on her wrist and she laid down, her haid in his lape. He felt her weight on his bony legs.   
'I need more time.' She whispered. Ivar looked at the wound, blood slightly slipping out of it.   
'I'll give you time.' He answered. He reached for the ointment and bandages and she started to protest again. 'Torhild,' He reacted impatient. 'in orde to get better you have to let us help. Don't distant yourself.'   
'I have it from you.' She replied. Ivar chuckled while he looked at ointment, taking some of it on its fingers before he pressed it against the wound. She gasped for breath a little, tensing under his fingers. 'Who were you talking to outside?' She asked after he got the most of the ointment on the wound.   
'You heared. Your mother.'   
'Must been a bright conversation.' She reacted, eyebrows frowned, looking at him.   
'Let's say she still hates me.'   
'And you her.'   
'I'll work on it.' He murmured. She turned a little so he could get to the wound on her back.  
'Why?' She asked curious.   
'For you.' She turned around again, lying on her back while she looked up to him. He laid his flat hand on her stomach, leaving her the chills that gave him a little satisfied grinn. 'I'll do anything for you, almost losing you maked that clear. And tonight proved that.' He said with a more softer vunerable voice.   
'You were eager to kill him, admit it. You had fun.'   
'I had fun.' He smiled in replied. She closed her eyes a little when his fingers roamed every bit of skin he could see on her stomach. She enjoyed it and it maked him confident. 'Never felt so consumed over something like tonight.' He whispered in thought, thinking about the blood eagle.   
'You were terrifying.'   
'Are you afraid of me?' He asked curious.   
'I never have been afraid of you.' She answered right away with a loving voice.   
'Never?' He asked with a little cocky smile. She looked at him and rolled her eyes.   
'One time, the first time I met you, when you killed that little boy because he didn't let you play along.'   
'And yet, when you gave me the ball that rolled over to you, you didn't looked scared.' He murmured, fingers bandaging her wounds carefully.   
'Because I knew you wouldn't hurt me. I always treated you to your image, I looked up to you. Your are fearless Ivar, tonight showed that to a lot of people, but isn't not always a bad thing. Your mind works extraordinary.' She pushed her hand up, resting her finger against his temple. 'I saw what I saw, I saw a man with great power to do damage, to be ruthless, but you did it out of justice, because it was the right thing to do. Your temper will get in control because your heart will overcome it.'   
'I thought you were the upset one today.' He reacted with a soft smile. She smiled back and shook her head. He thought about Sigurd, how he had killed him in that temper, in that moment of rage. Since than he had a bit more control, he didn't killed the lord when he wanted to, he listened to his oldest brother in battle. She wanted to pull away her finger from his temple but he embraced her hand with, leaving a kiss on the inside of her wrist. Ivar looked how she closed her eyes, enjoying the peace she had around her. 'You have no idea what I want to do with you.' He said against her wrist, giving her a promesing look. Her eyes flew open, looking up to him.   
'Shame that I've been stabbed.' She replied with the same look. She stroke her fingers over his jawline. Yes ... it was shame that she was stabbed. 'Maybe you should stay away from me for a while. I'll make you soft one day.' She whispered into her own thoughts.  
'It would take more than only you to do that. And what I do is only for you, what I feel is only for you, what I show is only for you Torhild.'   
'See, soft.'


	29. // 28 //

Torhild sat against a tree, resting her head while she looked at the shieldmaidens train under the leading of her mother. Ase was fierce, she was good and Lagertha kept pushing her to the limits to become an even better shieldmaiden. She looked down to her lap where her knife rested. In the three weeks that had past nothing had changed for her, she grew stronger but she still demanded a certain way of rest. They kept her out of the meetings as a way to restore her stenght again. Torhild was bored, Ivar taunted her every single moment, it was her only way of amusement, him. She knew that Björn sended vikings masked as soldiers to the kingdom from king Aethelwulf to deliver messages in the name of Lord Edgar. That everything went good and well and the vikings kept there part of the deal and that they were waithing on orders to raid a new kingdom. In that way it buyed them some time to restore balance and come up with a plan. Everybody was fit, trained and recovered, except for Torhild. She looked how her mother fought of three girls, Ase saw it as an opportunity but even then her mother saw her coming. A smile came on her lips when she saw Lagertha's sword pointing to her throat. 'Can I?' She asked her mother, getting up. The wound was closed, her energy restored but some movements still give her pain, not that she showed it to anybody.   
'You are not ready.' Her mother smiled.   
'You can't be certain of it without trying.' Torhild begged. Lagertha complimented Ase before she walked over to her daughter.   
'I had simular wounds, that kind of wounds need time to heal, so does your spirit.'   
'My spirit works just fine mother.' Torhild smiled in slight protest. Lagertha shoved her sword in her belt and walked aside her daughter back to the center of the settlement.   
'The gods give you time daughter. You need to use that time to find peace with yourself. You are young, you can be afraid of the things that happened.' She comforted. Torhild looked to the path and nodded slowly. She was afraid, afraid to die and it was something she wasn't proud of. When the came across the great hall she saw Ivar sitting on the steps before it. He looked up to her, his bleu eyes piercing through hers. It was all he did, just looking while they walked further. 'He never answered my question.' Lagertha began.   
'Who?'   
'Did he never told you about the conversation we had?' She asked surpriced. Torhild looked over her shoulder towards Ivar who was already back to carving into wood ... it became a habit of him.   
'No. Can't imagine it was a good one.' She replied. Lagertha laughed a little and shook her head.  
'I don't know what it is between the two of you Torhild but I see what I see and that is a strange attraction. You two are so set on each other.'   
'He protects me and I protect him. We have a very long friendship behind us and you can't expect me to trow that away for your needs. I need him and he needs me.' She said honestly. Her mother stood still before the little house and turned towards her daughter.   
'Good.' She smiled, carresing her cheek before she walked away. Torhild looked at her mother before she walked back to the great hall, sitting aside Ivar.   
'Well?' He asked curious.   
'Well what?'   
'What did she had to say?' He looked up, studied her face thoroughly.   
'Nothing really, need to clear my head and make piece with myself before I can get back to training. I feel useless.' She sighed, wrapping her arms around her knees and resting her head on it.   
'Come to the meeting tonight.'   
'I'm not allowed.' She replied. Ivar looked around before he moved his head closer, resting his chin on her arm.   
'Break some rules, put one a fancy dress and that attitude, they will buy it.' He smiled his typical cocky smiled and pulled back.   
'No wonder my mother says you have a bad influence on me.' Torhild reacted.   
'She said that?' He asked amused. Torhild rolled her eyes and shook her head.   
'I hear her thinking it every time she sees you.'   
'She doesn't know the half of what I do to you.' He murmuled, back at the carving again.   
'Stop teasing me.'   
'Get better soon princess.' He said when she stood up again.   
'Don't call me princess.'   
'See you tonight on the meeting.' She turned around and looked at his smug grinn, he knew already that she would push his idea through and go to that meeting.

Black maked her look confident and fierce, or that is what Hvitserk always said when she showed up in black. Not that she had much here, just the dress she had from the king and two of her own, so she choose black. 'You look good.' Ase noticed who stood in the doorway looking at her. Torhild turned around and smiled softly.   
'I feel good. Mother wants me to take it easy but I feel I'm ready to get back.'   
'She cares about you, thats all.' Ase comforted her. Torhild just nodded and walked aside her friend to the great hall. She felt nervous for some reason. In the past three weeks they hardly had said something about the plans to take down Aethelwulf, she knew nothing and now she would burst in just to make herself usefull.   
'Is this a good idea?' She asked Ase when they stood before the small stairs before the great hall.   
'It's Ivar his idea, those are never good.' Ase laughed. Torhild smiled and walked up. Ase pushed the door open and let her in, all eyes turned to her in a instant.   
'Gentlemen, mother.' She greeted the attendees.  
'Torhild what are you doing here?' Lagertha asked while giving Ivar a sharp look because he was just smiling about her entering.  
'I'm sick of doing nothing.' She answered.   
'You look good princess.' Halfdan said. Torhild bowed for him, thanking him for his words. She was glad others noticed she was better, just her mother wouldn't see it.   
'She is ready mother.' Björn took her side on this and she gave him a loving smile, standing aside her brother who said besides his mother on the throne. Torhild looked towards Ivar who looked back at her with that intense, slightly proud look. She almost blushed under that look and turned her eyes somewhere else ... to her mother who pointed her attention to king Harald. He wasn't punished yet and Torhild asked herself why that was.   
'Heavy defenses you say?' She got further on the subject. Harald looked aside to his brother.   
'It a little like Paris, high walls, heavy secured. We would loose a lot of men by getting in.' Halfdan explained. Torhild nodded slowly, just as Ubbe did. They were kept there, Torhild knew the kingdom of Aethelwulf and it was indeed a hard thing to get in.   
'What are you suggesting than?' Lagertha asked, a little confused by the brothers who changed looks with each other.   
'If we want to do it we need somebody like Floki, to build things.'   
'Or somebody like her.' Ivar pointed towards Torhild. She jerked her head around and looked at him, totally confused by his suggestion.   
'I don't want to hear your plans Ivar, they are reckless.'   
'Let him speak.' Björn interuppted his mother. Ivar nodded approvingly.   
'Get her on the inside.' He simple explained. Torhild started thinking, if she got in, as a guest with some others for her protection she could easily get one gate open. If Aethelwulf suspected nothing, like why lord Edgar wasn't there. She needed a reason to be there. While she though of it her eyes felt on Ubbe.   
'We are not putting Torhild in that kind of danger again.' Lagertha suppressed Ivar his idea.  
'There wouldn't be any danger if he didn't except any troubles.' Torhild whispered, still looking at Ubbe, he pushed his eyebrow up, waiting fora n explanation.   
'What do you have in mind?' Björn asked, turning towards his sister.   
'A announcement.' She shrugged.   
'From the deal you made with Lord Edgar? About you and me getting married?' Ubbe asked.   
'We tell him, he will hold a feast, I know that, we can bring some guest. If all our leaders are in there he wil not expect something from the outside. If we are with fifty, a few can slip away to get the gates secured, let the army in,' she felt silent and looked to her brother who stood up, nodding, giving her that wide open smile.   
'You could easily be a daughter of Ragnar.' He complimented her. Torhild blushed and bowed thankfull for his words. 'Lagertha will stay on the outside with the army, we make a carefull plan and Aethelwulf won't know what hit him.' Björn said enthusiastic.   
'Not what you had in mind?' Lagertha asked Ivar who looked with a stubborn look right at her. She was pulling his bad side out. He ingored her mother completly and Torhild pushed herself away from the throne, sitting aside him. She saw Lagertha watching the both of them so Torhild said nothing for a while.   
'What is it?' She asked when Björn, Ubbe and Lagertha started with some rough plans.   
'What if he insist on you marrying Ubbe?'   
'I won't marry him Ivar, are you really concerned about that?' She laughed amused. He looked away, angry, ignoring her to. His protective attitude was almost cute, in this way he pulled Torhild only closer to him. She stood up, her fingers drumming on the table. 'If I want to marry someone it would be a son of Rangar,' she felt silent and bowed a little closer to him. 'And it wouldn't be Ubbe or Hvitserk.' She said softly while pulling away, walking back to her mother and brother. Leaving him and his first reactions for later. Would it work? Possible, if all Ragnar his sons were there and if Aethelwulf didn't suspect anything about lord Edgar his dead. But if it failed ... it would be a big bloodbath and it was that little detail that maked her uncertain. Was it good for her to come back in the game? She stroke her fingers over her stomach, over the wound, drifting in her own thoughts.


	30. // 29 //

'Do you miss home?' Ase asked. Torhild looked away from the dark sky aside to her friend. Torhild left that meeting with the need to clear her head, like she always did before something big. Going to Aethelwulf and bluff about marrying Ubbe was such a thing, especially because she knew a whole attact plan stood behind it. So Ase accompanied her in a long walk on horseback to the beach.   
'Often.' She whispered, looking at the horizon behind all those ships. They left the horses on the egde of the forest and walked side by side over the beach. 'Not so much as in the beginning. The people I care about are here so,' her voice fadded a little and she stroke her hand over the sore spot on her stomach.   
'Are you ready?' Ase asked, looking at her stomach hidden underneath her dress.   
'For politics yes, fighting, don't know.'   
'It really hitted you, didn't it?' She guessed. Torhild her smiled fadded and she stopped on the side of one of the ships, slidding her hand over the wood.   
'Yes.' She answered before looking up to Ase. 'I don't feel so confident anymore, always overthinking things. I feel asamed, for being so weak.'   
'Weak,' repeated Ase directly. 'You're not weak Torhild, you are one of the most strongest woman I met. You are young, don't forget that but you are verry strongheaded, I don't know what Björn would have done but it would be a lot more brutal. So I think you saved some lives by the things you did.' She said. Torhild smiled shortly while she climb on one of their boats. Somewhere deep inside Torhild wanted to go home, rest for a while, think things over. But she didn't had that choice, that's why her mother kept her away from the meetings and fighting. So much had changed and Torhild felt like she drifted away from things.   
'Morther want's you to keep an eye on me, isn't it?' Torhild asked softly while hugging the mast, resting her head against the pole and looking at the ocean.   
'Yes.' Ase replied honest.   
'That's why she trains you that hard.'   
'She wants you safe.'   
'I am.' Torhild signed. She was safe, during her whole journey here there was one person that kept her safe ... it was Ivar.   
'She doesn't trust him.'   
'Do you?' Torhild asked. Ase sat on the edge of the boat and played with the braid in her hair.   
'I don't know Ivar as good like you do, I know he is dangerous but not for you. I trust him enough.' She aswered. Torhild looked at her friend and gazed to the waves again. 'It is more between you and Ivar.'   
'Yes.' Torhild answered, making her body loose from the pole and walking over to Ase.   
'He is a cripple Torhild, Hvitserk loves you equally, I know that.'   
'Hvitserk isn't Ivar.' She reacted, maybe a little in defense for Ivar. Why was everyone doubting Ivar? Yes he was a cripple but he was everything for her. And in moments like this, while she was so unstable then there was Ivar and he held her above water just enough to take a new breath of air.   
'I leave you for a moment.'   
'Thank you Ase.' She whispered while sucked down in her own doubt and uncertainty again.

Ase didn't come back, she left and it took an hour before Torhild heared someone else approaching. 'There is my wife to be.' Ivar joked. Torhild turned her head away from the sea and looked how he pulled his body in the boat, his horse and chariot tided around another boat.  
'Very funny.' She replied neutral.   
'What? You said it yourself.' He grinned. She looked how he crawled towards her, resting his back against the side while she sat on the edge. 'Not funny?' He asked. Torhild looked away and gazed back to the ocean, feeling the waves rock underneath the boat a little.   
'I ment it Ivar. I wouldn't marry somebody else, not by choose and not under pressure.' She pulled her eyes away from the sea and looked to him ... but he wasn't looking back. 'Tell me you think the same.'   
'I won't marry, you know that. You mother wouldn't allow it and besides,' he felt silent for a moment, still not looking. 'I can't make you happy.' He followed. She thought that he would say something like that. She slided her body from the edge and sat down besided him. It was something that draw a line between the two of them every time. He not admitting that he could be good and could love and she not letting him think that of himself.   
'Why do you find that so hard to,'   
'I'm a cripple Torhild.' he interupted her angry, eyes full of conflix in his own feelings. 'I couldn't make you happy like others do, I won't be able to give you childeren, even less, satisfy you.' He followed. She clenshed her jaws together, angry about his words, words that she tried to change even since he was little.   
'I hate you for this, always thinking less of yourself.'   
'Makes it easier to not love me.' Where was this coming from all of the sudden?   
'What did my mother said to you?' She asked, pulling her body away from aside him.   
'Nothing.' He answered. She just stared at him trying to wrap her head around everything he said. It felt like he was letting go of her, like he pushed her away and for her it felt like heartbreak.   
'Why? Ivar, it feels like you push me away.' The desperate tone in her voice was enough to turn his eyes her way.   
'You don't derseve someone as twisted and hatered as me. When you said you only wanted to marry me I thought of that, of the things I could never give you.'   
'Does it matter? You tell me that everything you did for me, the kisses, the connection, it was nothing?' She asked, shocked, angry, confused and even sad.   
'No. you mean the world to me Torhild. Even when I'm distant and angry with others around you are the only one I think of.'   
'So you love me?'   
'Yes, but I can't make you happy. It's simple as that. Maybe you should marry Hvitserk.'   
'You did not just say that!' She hissed, pushing her body up ready to leave. But on the egde of the boat she turned around to him again. He was looking at her, eyes filled with a certain pain and despare. 'Do you mean everything you just said?' She asked. If his answer would be yes she would leave and never look back to him.   
'No.' He answered.   
'Why do you say it then?'   
'Because I'm afraid to fail you.' He whispered. Torhild walked over to him, placing herself on his lap while she laid her hand against his jaw. His eyes flamed up by her touch.   
'Let me prove you otherwise.'   
'No, Torhild.' His eyes shouted fear.   
'Yes Ivar, it's out of love, not because you want to prove yourself. I would never jugde you if it won't work.' She comferted him. She knew he had tried it with Margrethe and it didn't worked, leaving a scar in his already unstable mind. It was her duty to prove him otherwise. And she didn't gave him time to protest, she just placed her lips on his, opening them a little so he got all her tast, her feelings. She knew he couldn't resist that part of her so it didn't took him long before she felt his hand sneak around her waist, pulling her closer while his kiss grew more dominant. 'I like it when you get all vurneable.' She whispered teasing, a little out of breath.  
'Don't tell anybody, you will terrorize my ego.' He breathed against her neck, placing kisses over her throat leaving her with that longing desire. His hand traveled up over her back, untying the knot that held her dress together. She moved her head willingly in the direction his lips traveled, her eyes closed to absorbe more of the pleasure he runned through her body. She felt his hand pulling down her dress, leaving a trail of shiverings down her spine. He moved, laying her on her back on the wooded floor of the ship, so genlte, so not Ivar and only for her. His hand slide of her dress while she pulled his shirt of, leaving no more than only skin between them. His eyes met the wound on her stomach, despite it was healed, it still looked ungly.   
'I'm fine.' She whispered. He placed a kiss on the wound before his lips found hers again. She felt his naked chest contact with hers and it was like the warmth she felt started to center down. His uncertainty fadded with every kiss he gave her. His fingers roomed her body, the curves of her breasts, the soft pressure over her ribs. 'Ivar.' She moaned a little while curving her body up to his. He smiled, an almost dark smile but with a lot of love admiring. Her nails pulled a trail over his spine leaving him short of breath for a change. How demanding his kiss was, she totally fell for it, for him. While his hand traveled up her leg, under the lefts from her dress, hers roamed his chest down to unbottem his trousers. Non of this felt like her times with Hvitserk. It went so much deeper, makes so much more loose. That he had skinny unfeeling legs didn't do a thing to her, that he had said to her he couldn't satisfy a woman even less. She was eager to prove him wrong and she did. She gave Ivar the security he was looking for and she give herself the best moment in past time, leaving the both of them whispering each others names in desire and out of breath. Feeling his movements inside her didn't kept in with only whispers but because there was nobody around she didn't really care. Torhild did wat Margrethe couldn't do, she proved the world that Ivar wasn't a cripple, not that she did it for them, she did it for him. She panted, covered in sweat while she reached the last of her self control and colapsed around him short before he did the same. Torhild hadn't much breath over when he pressed his lips to hers again.  
'I hope your mother let me marry you one day.' He said with a heavy breath.   
'Oh, now you want to marry me?' She asked, tired but with a satisfied grinn around her lips. 'Told you I would prove you wrong.'   
'Should never doughted you.' He replied, resting his body besides hers. Torhild closed her eyes, catching her breath for a moment, thinking back on all the things he had done.   
'For being a cripple you do extrodionary things Ivar.' She said after a while, impressed by the fact that she was so tired off it. She was feeding his ego, he didn't needed it, his eyes shouted the onfident he felt on that moment.   
'Did I hurt you?'   
'No.' She reacted right away, throwing him a reasurring glance.  
'You should rest, we need you sharp tomorrow.'   
'I don't know if I will be sharp after this.' She reacted dreamy. She turned her head and looked to him, smiling.   
'Is this your honest opinion or just you wanting to make me feel better?'   
'Believe me when I say, Hvitserk can learn a thing of two.' She stroke her hand over his hair that was quite the mess before she pushed a kiss against his lips. 'Don't get all cocky about it.'   
'I will try.' He winked. Trying was failing with Ivar. She looked back up to the sky, closing her eyes to look for sleep but his fingers roaming every bit of visable skin didn't really gave her a fair change. 'You know,' he began, placing his lips against her shoulders. Torhild didn't open her eyes, she only hummed a little in reply. 'now that I know that I can do this we should come here more often.' He said with a promesing voice.   
'There isn't a holding you back, is there?' She joked while looking at him. He smiled down to her, that smug attitude all over him.   
'Not when it comes to you.' He answered honest.   
'Lucky me.'   
'I wouldn't say that.' He said in a dark promesing voice, pulling all her desire back up. By all the gods, what was he doing with her?


	31. // 30 //

Torhild stroke her hand over the white skin of the stallion, lord Edgar his stallion. He was magnificent. Torhild always had a soft spot for horses and he was just gorgeous. 'You are not thinking of riding that horse?' Hvitserk his head popped up on the other side of the stallion.  
'Why not, it wasn't his fault he had a rider like lord Edgar.' She smiled to him. Hvitserk ducked underneath the stallion his neck, looking over her body with narrowed eyes.   
'Where were you last night?' He asked. Torhild lifted her chin a little, supressing the thoughts of last night. Despite the fact that Ivar waked her to early and harshly the memory layed vivid on her mind.   
'With Ivar.'   
'Doing what?'   
'Looking to the stars.' She faked a smile.   
'Sounds romantic.'   
'It was, you could learn from that.' Torhild chuckled, walking out of the primative stables before him. Lagertha walked with Ase by her side over, changing looks with Hvitserk before she turned to her daughter.   
'We need to prepare you for Lord Aethelwulf.' Ase announched. Torhild pulled her eyesbrows up, a little surpriced.   
'What is wrong with this?' She pointed down over her dress. Yes, it had a crack of two and her hair was a mess but not something that couldn't be fixed.   
'I have a dress from home for you. In order to convinse that king you need to look powerfull.'  
'And your mother knows how to do that.'   
'I know, I'm her daughter.' Torhild replied to Ase who looked very often over to Hvitserk. Torhild looked over her shoulder to Hvitserk who looked at the ground in a moment. 'Nice, and here I thought you were madly in love with me.' She petted him on the shoulder, giving a promesing look before she walked after her mother and Ase. The settlement had a certain tensing in the air, everybody was prepping for the attack once Torhild could arrange a feast. So it was a lot of pressure again on her shoulders. She was glad Ubbe supported her in this so she hadn't do it alone.

The dress was a white with gold one, hign neck, curved over her body while her brown hair felt lose over her shoulders. Lagertha braided a small part of her hair with pearls before she putted a small crown on her head. 'Isn't that to much?' Torhild asked trying to look up to her own head.  
'Power is signatured with gold and possessions, the gods gifted you with beauty, we need to use that in order to get you to lie better.' Her mother smiled. Torhild just looked in front of her while she still sat on the seat, waiting on a new order. 'What do you want Ivar?' Lagertha asked. Torhild didn't even heared him crawl in.   
'Her.' He answered so deadly serious that she froze in the moment before turning towards him. He bited the inside of his cheek, with that cocky amused grinn all over his face.   
'We are making her ready for Ubbe and the king.' Lagertha said rather neutral while Ase give her a bracelet. Wrong words, Ivar his face flattened, the grin disappeared in the anger in his eyes. 'Where were the both of you last night?' Her mother asked curcious, sliding the golden bracelet around Torhild her wrist.   
'Making love under the stars.' He answered coldly. He not just said that. Torhild froze, feeling Ase looking at her while she looked at him.   
'Torhild?' Lagertha asked. She saw Ivar his eyebrow go up a little, like he was interested of what she would answer. Why did he do this? Always reacting out of anger or jealousy on the wrong moments.   
'Non of your business mother. Can I have a word with Ivar.' She asked calm, still not losing his cold bleu eyes. Ase walked out without any hessitation, Lagertha changed looks between the two of them, asking herself about the fact what Ivar just told her. 'Mother.' Torhild warned softly. Lagertha gave Ivar a warning look before she walked out. Torhild stood up and closed the door, turning her body slowly to Ivar. 'You jealous idiot.' She began, her hand on her stomach again. The wound hurted more after tonight, something he immidiatly saw.   
'You're in pain.'   
'Don't change the subject, you have to learn to get your emotions in check Ivar. We all need to be focused, you saying thing around doesn't help.' She lectured him. Normaly she wouldn't care if somebody knew about her and Ivar. But in this moment it was crucial that they held their heads together, he, see, her mother, even Ubbe.   
'Isn't it the truth?' He tilted his head, giving her one of his dangerous looks.   
'You just said it to get back on Ubbe.' She hissed, sighing before putting her fingers on her temples.   
'Why do you need to marry Ubbe, why don't you marry me instead?'   
'It isn't a real marriage Ivar,' she shouted out almost despaired. 'and nobody would support this marriage, I need the oldest one. Besides, your own words, nobody would want to marry a cripple.' She fired back. He pulled his body on to the seat she sat on earlier, eyes flaming all kinds of bleu colors.   
'You are mine.'   
'I'm not a slave Ivar,' she whispered in anger, walking over to him to put a finger against his chest. 'I thought last night maked that one clear.' She followed. Ivar grabbed her arm, pulling her down, demaning a kiss with his lips on hers. No, he couldn't distract her, not when he was all jealous and demaning like this. She grabbed his chin and pulled away. 'Don't. I need to focus, you're not helping.' Her breathing already unsteady by the thoughts of last night.   
'Don't fight me than.' He replied. She slapped her hand against the side of his head and stood up, walking away to a safe distant before she turned around facing him.   
'You need to learn two things,'   
'And what is that?' He asked her, still provoking her to get angry and closer. How much she wanted to do both, she stayed where she stood.   
'First. Don't test my patience, I'm not a slave girl you can boss around. Second, I'm yours and nothing can change than. Keep your moodiness and uncertainty for yourself.' She forced a smile on her lips, he saw she didn't meant it. 'I need the other you tonight, the fearless Ivar the Boneless, can you do that without being to concerned about me?' She asked. His eyes softened a little and Torhild knew she had won. He nodded. She relaxed and walked over to him, pressing her lips against his forehead. 'If this was an attempt to push me away, you failed, still love you.' She smiled.   
'You know you have to fake everything with Ubbe, kissing him, loving him.'   
'I pretend it is you Ivar.' She signed before walking out. She wasn't quite done with him yet.

Her fight, or whatever it was, with Ivar gave her a certain attitude. Torhild walked in the great hall, her hand steady resting on her stomach while she nodded towards the brothers Finehair before she walked to her mother who sat on the throne. Hvitserk and Ubbe stood aside her brother, jaws dropped by her beauty. 'I don't think you can control this princess so easily like you handle Margrethe.' Hvitserk joked against his older brother.   
'You should know, you had her.' Ubbe replied, both admiring the vieuw.   
'I'm standing here.' Torhild reminded the two of them before they started talking about sharing her, like this marriage was real. She heared Ivar crawling in but held her eyes straight to her mother and brother.   
'You seem ready.' Björn noticed. Everybody was glad to see her healthy again. Expect for the pain she felt from last night there wasn't much bodering her. Her confidence in battle would come back in time, for now she needed to be of help in this way.   
'I am if Ubbe is to.' She answered while looking over to Ubbe who looked over her body again.   
'I married the wrong woman but yes,' Ubbe laughed, taking another sip of his ale. 'I'm ready.' He comfirmed.   
'Björn and Ivar will accompany you so he doesn't look for a treath in all of this.'   
'What if it doesn't work?' Ase asked. 'What if he knows about Lord Edgar, what if instead of us making a trap he already laid one?' her questions dropped a heavy silence over the people who gathered in the great hall. Torhild felt the pain as a friendly reminder. She looked down and than aside to Ivar who looked back at her, changing a look of concern to her stomach.   
'We secured that part, it is unlikely that he knows about it.' Björn shook his head. Ase bowed a littled and came to stood aside Torhild.   
'You have twenty man with you, if we don't hear from anyone over three days a presume you are captured. Keep each other safe.' Lagertha said, looking from her son to Ase and finally to Ivar. They looked at each other for a long time but in the end she saw Ivar nod a little before Lagertha pulled her look away from Ivar to her daughter. 'Don't get yourself in danger, your not fully recovered.'   
'There will nothing happen mother.' She reassured her mother before walking after her brother and others outside.

The kingdom of king Aethelwulf layed a little on a hilltop. Ivar his horse had a hard time to get the chariot over the path up to the first gates. 'Princess Torhild, I need to speak the king.' She announched with a strong fearless attitude. It was rather false, her body was tensed, scared that Ase her words maybe were true. It took the soldier a while before he came back and opening the gates so the company could walk in.   
'Let the hunt begin.' Ivar whispered for himself.   
'You know what I said.' She said softly. Ivar changed a look with her and nooded seriously. He had to leave his horse and she needed to leave his side to walk aside Ubbe. It was a labyrint of hallways before they came before a big wooden door. Torhild recognized the door from when she was here to bargain with him. Now it was for something entirely different. A lot of their man were commanded to stay outside so it was only Torhild, the two brothers and Björn. Two soldiers pushed the door open, Torhild saw him sitting after the table, eating like a king. She took a large breath and walked in. Her eyes gave a short glance over the soldiers who stood aside in the room, to many for her teast.   
'Princess Torhild.' He greeted her neutral, like he knew she was coming. He wasn't even supriced to see her alive and well again.   
'King Aethelwulf.' She bowed, the others, except for Ivar, did to. When her eyes met his she saw something from a soft smile spreading over his face before he stood up, resting his firsts on the table. His eyes grew serious and Torhild swallowed her fear in, trying to look steady back.   
'I heared some serious things about you, about what happened with Lord Edgar.' Those last two words lingered in the air and Torhild felt the cold catching her heart. Her eyes left those of the king and she looked slowly aside to her brother, not being able to say a thing. He knew, how did he knew?


	32. // 31 //

'Seize him.' King Aethelwulf pointed towards Ivar. The soldiers came in motion, Torhild pulled the only knife she had on her, that knife and blocked their way to Ivar.   
'Don't.' She warned Aethlewulf. He smiled, walking around his table, getting closer every inch.  
'Shortly after the joined attack to the kingdom I got a rapport. This cripple,' he pointed towards Ivar. 'was trying to kill Lord Edgar.' Aethlewulf announched. Torhild looked down to Ivar who looked with all his hatered to the king. 'You didn't knew?' Aethlewulf asked.   
'How would I know, I was being stabbed by one of his men.' She hissed in a reply, her hand covering the spot on her stomach, like she was trying to defend it. Aethlewulf looked at it, overthinking it.   
'Shame you got stabbed, glad to see you up again. I know that Lord Edgar didn't played by the rules, he is a childhood friend and I thoughts he wouldn't cause trouble under my rule. I misjugded him, for that I will pull him back from the settlement and replace him with,' he turned around, pointing to the table. Torhild hadn't even noticed the young man, Ubbe his age she guessed, sitting after the table. He was handsome, she admitted that, dark, almost black hair, green sharp eyes. He had some expressions from .... 'This is Edward, Lord Edgar his son, he will take command over the settlement while I speak to Edgar.' Aethelwulf introduced Edward to the brothers and Torhild and the other way around. So he didn't knew about Lord Edgar his dead? He was just referring to the things Lord Edgar had done? Changed a lot.   
'Ivar was protecting me.'   
'That Boneless is a danger to uss all, he will be punished.' Aethlewulf smiled darkly. She knew he always had a grudge on Ivar, this was the perfect way to get his way for a change. 'Unless you want to be punished to?' Aethlewulf tilted his head, obsessive smiling to the both of them.  
'Torhild.' Björn warned her. She looked down to Ivar who shook his head. He was beyond anger but he kept her safty in the first place.   
'What is his punishment?' She asked, looking up again, already scared for the answer. The king didn't looked to her, he looked to Ivar, almost cheerfull.   
'Fifteen lashed from the wip.' He announched. Torhild frooze, fear sprung in her eyes when she looked down to Ivar again. 'Take him.' Aethelwulf ordered his men.   
'I will take his place.' Ubbe volenteert. Torhild crouched down before Ivar, swallowing her tears.  
'You don't have to do this alone.' She whispered. He smiled, softly almost.   
'You suffered already enough. Get the plan in motion, be safe, don't be all reckless because of me.'   
'You would do the same.' She murmured. Two soldiers grabbed him with his arms forcing him up. Torhild looked how they took him away, legs dragging over the floor out of the room.  
'Torhild.' Ubbe layed his hand on her shoulder and she remembered the plan. She layed her hand over his and he helped her up, pulling her in a soft embrace. She really wanted to cry and she really wanted this but she didn't let herself, not until the plan was set.   
'I'm sorry Torhild, rules are rules. To what have I to thank this visit?' Aethlewulf asked while he sat comfortly on his seat again. Torhild turned away from Ubbe, she saw Edward looking at her like she was some kind of goddess.   
'The settlement is a little devided. A big group of the Heathen army roots for Torhild while the other half does that for the sons of Ragnar. We want to reunite that,'   
'by marriage.' Aethlewulf intterupted Björn. Björn nodded, looking aside to his sister and Ubbe. 'The two of them?' He asked.  
'I'm the oldest son from Ragnar, after Björn but he is already married and Torhild is the last princess, her throne is her right.' Ubbe explained, stroking his fingers over her arm, resting them softly around her elbow.   
'And it there more to it? Is this love?' The king asked, explicitly looking to Torhild. She nodded, looking aside to Ubbe with a sort smile.   
'Yes.'   
'It was a marriage arragement that stood since they were little. Now is the time, the settlement is a little out balance so I hope that you give our this blessing and we can marry the both of them here on English soil.' Björn formulated it so polite and friendly as possible. King Aethlewulf clapped his hands, standing up from his seat again.   
'Offcourse, we should hold a feast in honor of that marriage her at the castle. I'm truly looking forward to how a viking wedding works.' He reacted delighted. Torhild forced the best smile on her lips she could find.   
'Thank you very much.' She bowed.   
'Come, sit, eat a little.' He gestured to the table he sat after. Torhild nodded and walked with Ubbe and Björn over to the table. 'In preparing to that, I will punish Ivar tomorrow and we hold a feast next week. I talk it over with my men tonight. Until then you and your future husband can stay here at the castle. You to Björn Ironside, if you want.' He was so happy about it.   
'I need to inform the settlement, a lot of people are looking forward to this.' Björn smiled.  
'Offcourse, the invite is for your people to.' Aethlewulf nodded. 'What thinks Lord Edgar of this?' he asked curious. Torhild looked to her brother, surly he had a good answer.   
'He isn't happy, thinks there is a plan behind this. So he doesn't want to come to this feast if tthere is any so he can guard the settlement.' Björn played open card. That he was telling a part of the truth didn't sink in with the king.   
'Smart man your farther Edward. It is good to hear. We can speak of his behavior after the feast next week.' Aethlewulf agreed with his own. But the only thing Torhild really could think of was Ivar and the fact that he would be torture for a crime he didn't even fulfill ... not by the kings knowing at least.

She and Ubbe got one of the biggest rooms there were in the castle. And she thinking that the last one she stayed in was big. She closed the door and turned to Ubbe. 'I don't know Torhild.' He immidiatly reacted.   
'We can't let Ivar have this.' She pointed out of the window, upset.   
'He will survive this, it's Ivar.' Ubbe tried to comferted her. Torhild sat down on the bed trying to get some things in order. It was a good thing that the king didn't knew about Edgar, the bad thing was that Ivar had to pay the price for his recklessness. And like Ubbe said, er wasn't much she could do about it.   
'We need to keep Lord Edgar his dead still a secret for a week.' She said after a while, turning her body on the bed to watch at Ubbe. He was staring uit the window, conflixed. 'And you say I can't worry.' She smiled softly. Ubbe turned his head and sighned.   
'Ever hurt about the wrath of Ivar The Boneless;'   
'No, you?'   
'I think we gonna find out.' He answered. Torhild pulled the crown of her head and looked to the eldest brother while thinking how she would find Ivar after fifteen lashes.   
'Do you think he would let me see him?' She asked. Ubbe pushed himself away from the window and fell down on the bed, he was surpriced by the softness of it. His eyebrows came up in disbelief.   
'We should marry and live the rest of our lives here.' He suggested. Torhild slapped him against the shoulder and stood up.   
'I'm gonna see if I can see Ivar.'   
'Good luck.' He murmered, half away to his dreams.   
'You're not coming?' Torhild asked in the doorway.   
'Not that I can say something to Ivar that would help him.'   
'He is your brother Ubbe.'   
'There you say it.' He chuckled. Torhild shook her head and walked out of the room. There was a guard, offcourse, he followed her. When she came downstairs she walked against Edward.   
'Oh, I'm sorry princess.' He reacted hastly, almost shy. Torhild frowned her eyebrown and smiled to the young man.   
'My fault.' She appolagized.   
'The King is bussy, where you looking for him?' He asked before she could walk away. Torhild turned around, narrowing her eyes, showing a loving smile on her lips. He looked like the type she could charm or impress.   
'I want to see Ivar?' She asked, biting her lip in a moment. His eyes sucked right to it and Torhild had to do her best to not roll her eyes.   
'You can't see him, sorry.'   
'I can see him. You're gonna beat him tomorrow, I have my rights.' She insisted. She saw the hessistation in his eyes and just when she thought he would give in his face turned serious again.   
'Sorry Torhild. Can't.' He repeated himself. 'Bring her back to her room.' He commanded the soldier who had followed her. Torhild faked a smile and bowed before she walked back to her room. Ubbe pushed his head up, she only shook her head. Torhild stood still before the mirror and started to pull of her jewerly.   
'Torhild, to be safe, I'm here to.'   
'You never saw a girl in a underdress Ubbe?' She joked.   
'I have a wife.'   
'Don't you find it bad that she isn't here?' Torhild asked. Ubbe stood up, stading after her. Torhild looked at him with a small grin when he helped her with her dress.   
'Not really, this plan would never work otherwise.' He said. She felt his fingers a short part over her skin and she thought of Ivar.   
'Thank you husband.'   
'Ivar would kill me.' He laughed. Yes, Ivar would kill him if he saw what Ubbe did. Despite the fact he just helped her, he also touched her, would sleep in the same room and if it's one thing that Ivar always maked clear ... she was his.


	33. // 32 //

He couldn't look more distant, not even to Torhild. She always saw a spark somewhere, compassion, anger, love when he looked at her but not now. He was totally turned in himself, bleu eyes with nothing more than cold emotionless look. He didn't show he was afraid, he didn't even cared how much people were looking. In that moment, that the soldiers walked by with him between their body's, in the moment they changed a look she become afraid of him. If it wasn't for Ubbe who embraced her from behind she would ran of. Torhild never was really afraid for him, except for their first meeting she never felt afraid but know ... watching how they brought him to a little stage where everybody just could watch. 'I can't.' She whispered.   
'You have to Torhild, for him.' Ubbe reacted. She knew he was right, if Ivar would see her go it would take away a part of his fightingspirit. Torhild turned her head and looked over her shoulder to him, even he looked scared. Her eyes fell on King Aethlewulf who stepped their way.  
'Princess Torhild, Ubbe.' He greeted the both of them. Torhild didn't look at him, she looked to Ivar who sat up in front of a pole. His forehead rested against it, eyes looking to the ground.  
'Punishing him is the biggest mistake you could make.' Ubbe said.   
'Let him make that mistake if he wants to get the consequences.' Torhild murmured. She didn't looked up to Aethlewulf who only softly nodded before he walked over to the little stage.   
'You love him.' Ubbe noticed. It was the only one besides of Ase who really know that much over her connection with Ivar. So ... she looked over her shoulder and nodded.   
'I can't loose him.'   
'I don't know Torhild.' Ubbe replied in thoughts. What if Ivar would be different? What if he would push her away?

Aethlewulf had more joy in watching this than doing it so he called up one of his soldiers. Torhild looked to the whip and than back to Ivar. He turned his head and looked at her, still with that distant hollow look. He didn't even paid attention to the fact that Ubbe had his arms wrapped around her. His hair felt out of it's place, dark strains covering the darkness in his eyes. Torhild took a deep breath when somebody pulled open his clothes so his back was to see for everybody. She lifted her head a little, pulled strenght out of his look. But when that whip came down the first time she closed her eyes, tears welling up in her eyes when he arched his back in pain. Aethelwulf stood on a little distant, smiling but not satisfied. Had he thought that Ivar would yell in pain? Well, he didn't know Ivar then but he was getting to. With the second lash her tears started running over het cheeks but her emotions decreased to the frozingpoint. If she had a knife she would probarbly use it, if Ubbe hadn't had his arms around her she would ran over to that king and do something she would regret in the end. After ten lashed she saw the blood flew around when the man pulled the wip away. Ivar didn't screamt, he didn't even flinsh. From where she stood she couldn't see much of his back but she saw the blood and she saw the pain cracking open in his face. 'I can't.' She said again, pulling Ubbe his arms away and walking away from the people, calm, self-controlled before she crached down in her room. On a certain point even a viking could break. Torhild hadn't had a day rest since she came here. She was capture, humiliated, beated, stabbed and now this. Even her mentaly strong personality couldn't hold on any longer, leaving tears on her cheeck in a sign of defeat. More than ever she wanted to go home, back to Kattegat and that precisely what she was going to do when this was over. She dropped down on the ground besides the bed and letting herself go in the moment. She should never have come, she should stayed in Kattegat where it was safe, she should never been a shieldmaiden to begin with.

'Torhild.' Ubbe instisted. Her red eyes looked up to Ubbe who came the room in fast, a hardly moving body from Ivar in his arms.   
'Don't tell me,'   
'He is alive.' Ubbe intterupted her, laying Ivar his body on the bed, stomach down. Her eyes went to his back and she gasped when she saw the marks in his flesh, blood staining down from the wounds he had. Ivar his breathing was fast, unsteady, she almost heared his heart beating in her own chest.   
'Ivar.' She whispered, still crying. He didn't opened his eyes but she saw his fingertips moving a little so she shoved her fingers through his, looking to the lashed on his body. 'Do you now what you do?' She asked Ubbe when he pulled a bucked with water to the bed.   
'Not really but we have to clean these wounds so it won't infect.' He sounded out of breath.   
'I can do it, you get a healer from the settlement, I don't want any christian healer around him.'  
'You sure? I will be away for some time.' He asked, looking to her still wet face. Torhild nodded, holding her hand open so he would give her the fabric he pushed under water. 'I ride fast.' He gave her the fabric and walked out, leaving her all alone with Ivar. Torhild looked to his face, she wasn't sure if he was conscious but when she carefull pushed the cold fabric against his back his eyes flew open. And in a reflex he wanted to pull himself up, not giving in to the pain and defeat.  
'Ivar it's me, you're safe.' She reacted immidiatly. It took him several minuts before he body relaxed a little. She stroke his hair out of his face and held her hand on his sweaty forehead. 'I'm sorry.'   
'Don't.' His voice cracked cold. Torhild pulled her hand away and looked back to the wounds, carresing the wounds with the most care she could provide. But every little bit of pressure on it gave him discomfort what maked it for Torhild even harder to get his whole back done. Ivar drifted between his sleep and awake moments but he didn't say a word. The only thing she could see was that burning face that didn't promise anything good. When she was done he was sleeping so she layed aside him and felt asleep to, restless.

Her eyes flew open from sounds, movements in the room. She looked aside her to Ivar who sat up, trying to get from the bed but his face shouted the pain. 'Ivar.' He frooze. Torhild pushed her body up, looking to his back that started bleeding again while he tried to get from the bed. She stood up, walking to the other side. 'You can't, you need to rest.' She said concerned. But he wasn't listening and she laid her hand on his bare chest to prevent him. 'I'm sorry for what happened, if it,'   
'Stop!' He shouted angry. Torhild starled, stepping back while she looked to those eyes again. She was afraid it would change him, and it did. He looked more distant than he ever was before. She saw him in all kind of moods but this was a new one and it maked her scared.   
'What?' Her voice trembled a little, to soft to maybe heared.   
'You have to stop with thinking this is your fault.' He began.   
'it is my fault, if I maked that deal,'   
'No! This is on me. Don't you see that I only bring you misery. Did you look in the mirrow, you look like hell and that's on me. This won't be the last and I'm not letting you go through that again.' He hissed before his body felt from the bed. Torhild wanted to help him but his words kept her on her place. He groaned, pushing his hands under his body up.   
'What are you saying?' She asked whispering. Her emotions looked for an exit point but she pulled them back under again causing her to look at least a little distand herself.   
'It can't be me, I'm a cripple, I cause pain.' He murmured trying to get his body forward.   
'You're not a cripple not to me.'   
'Torhild look!' He yelled angry.   
'Ivar.' They both jerked their heads away from each other and looked at Ubbe, with a healer and Hvitserk.   
'Don't bother. I'm leaving.' She hissed, walking past Ivar to the door as fast as she could. He didn't stopped her, non of them did, only Hvitserk walked after her. The castle had some gorgeous gardens, gardens that were empy. Her passes were fast and she didn't really cared where she walked to.   
'Love, slow down.' Hvitserk grabbed her wrist to stop her. She turned around, smaching her fist against his chest, started to shake. 'I always told you he would cause you heartbreak.' He said. His hand sneaked around her waist, pulling her closer and Torhild wrapped her arms around his neck, buring her head against his neck. 'If I would knew earlier I would haved warned you. Ivar isn't like us, he can't give you what you want.'   
'He did and now he scares me.' She whispered through her tears.   
'I'm scared of him to, already for a very long time now.' Hvitserk replied on her broken words. Torhild felt safe in that moment, Hvitserk just embraced her, whispering all kinds of comforting things in her ears. And she forget the monster in the room. She knew Ivar said it just out of frustration and hate but in some kind of way he was right. His temper would cause him always troubles, he would often hurt her in a way she didn't wanted. But this was the hardest way to do it and it felt like her heart broke in pieces.   
'I loved him.' Torhild said to herself, out loud. Hvitserk pulled a little back, resting his hand around her cheek. She looked up in his steady calms eyes, the corner of his mouth lifted a little.  
'A broken heart always can be fixed.'   
'I hope you are right.'   
'I'm always right.' He joked, trying to lift the heaviness of the situation. She smiled a little and he smiled to. Everything could be fixed, she would fixe her heart and she would break that of the king.


	34. // 33 //

Torhild turned the knife around, the blade reflexted the sunlight on the wall from the room. She looked at the reflextion, drowning in her own thoughts and heartpain. She didn't knew how she had to go on. Tonight she had to put up her happy face in front of her brother, the king and everybody who would attend the feast. Her eyes traveled out, servants walked in and out to prepare the feast and they didn't even knew that it was a trap. 'Torhild.' She turned her head and looked to Hvitserk who laid in the bed. Her eyes traveled down his bare chest before she looked back outside to the servants. She wasn't playing him and he wasn't pushing her, but Hvitserk was the only thing that pulled her thoughts away from Ivar. And he knew her heartbreak so he just stayed and nothing more. 'How big will it be?'   
'Big.' She answered. Hvitserk turned on his stomach and Torhild looked back to him.   
'You should smile a little more tonight.' He suggested. Torhild forced a smile on her lips and walked back to the bed.   
'Better?'   
'No. Your brother will notice.'   
'He will be to busy leading the attact to notice the sadness from his sister.' She protested softly. Hvitserk rolled his eyes and both of them looked to the door that opened. Ubbe walked in, gave a promesing look before king Aethelwulf followed. His eyes widened when he saw Hvitserk lying on the bed.   
'Is it usual for you vikings to,' he pointed to Hvitserk and Ubbe. Torhild forced a smile on her lips and stood up, walking over to Ubbe and wrapping her arm around his.   
'Pretty usual.' Ubbe grinned. The king looked in a moment to Hvitserk who pulled some clothes on before he turned to Torhild.   
'My servants are ready to make you ready.'   
'How big will this feast be if it needs a whole day to prepare me?' She asked a little curious.   
'Not that big, you and Ubbe are invited for dinner with my and my family, so,' He smiled before walking out. Ubbe closed the door and turned to Torhild.   
'I'm feeling already christian.'   
'One day, I want to go home to.' She reassured him. They turned to Hvitserk who jumped on the bed to walk over. Torhild rolled her eyes and gave the biggest brother a fast look before she walked out.

She stood by the gate, waiting for Ase who traveled up and down between the settlement and the castle when she saw a white horse stopping aside her. She didn't want to look up, but she did. She followed the horse collar to his chariot. When she met those blue eyes she hoped that something would change but they still holded that darkness, that cold distant look. 'Ivar.' She greeted him neutral, looking back to the road as soon as she could. He didn't react, he clicked his tongue and his horse walked away. Torhild looked to him and nodded for herself, looking to Ase who approached her. She looked confuse and pointed over her shoulder to Ivar. 'Don't ask.' Torhild said. Ase frowned her eyebrows and jumped from the horse.   
'Everything is in place for the attack. As soon as the feast starts your mother and Halfdan will take over the gates. All the important people are with you he shouldn't notice a thing. You neither, one moment you talk, the other your mother comes in.'   
'Good, I want this over.' Torhild nodded.   
'You alright?' Ase asked while walking aside Torhild.   
'No, I will explain when this is over.' She whispered looking up to Ubbe.   
'You need to step up your game Torhild, the king doesn't liked your silence during the dinner.' Ubbe said as soon as she was within distant.   
'What is going on? If there is something that the army needs to know?' Ase instisted. Torhild looked to Ubbe and Ubbe looked back at her.   
'Ivar and Torhild have problems.' Ubbe spitted out. Torhild walked in front of them so she hadn't have to look to the looks they were changing.   
'How bad?' Ase asked.   
'I don't want to talk about it Ase.' Torhild hissed. Ase opened her mouth but closed it after a quick look from Ubbe. 'We need to prepare for a feast and a battle.' Torhild helped them remember.   
'Yes boss.' Ase whispered. Torhild walked in the castle and slipped away after a corner. She slipped down against the wall until she said on the ground. She layed her hand for her mouth and tried to push back her tears. Why didn't it just stop, why couldn't she just live on. And it wasn't Ivar his fault, yes, he pushed her away, yes, he didn't want to see her but the biggest and the largest monster in this was Lord Aethelwulf. She pulled in a deep breath and pushed herself up. She was going to kill the king, tonight.

'Björn Ironside!' Greeted King Aethelwulf the vikingleader loudly. Torhild pushed herself out of her seat and smiled to her brother.   
'Sister.' He greeted her with a kiss on her cheek. 'You look good.'   
'Thank you brother.' She thanked him before she turned to King Aethelwulf. 'This is King Harald Finehair, Ase, Hvitserk and Ivar you already met.' She introduced the persons to the king. There were a lot of other vikings present but these where the important onces. And she could kill herself that Ivar was present. She gave him a fast look before she turned back to the king who asked for the attention of all his guests. Torhild walked over to Ubbe and gave him a promesing look.   
'Ready princess.' He asked softly.   
'To kill a king, yes, always.'   
'Good, you are ready to become a queen Torhild.' He smiled down. His words gave her a little strenght. The king asked for the hand of his wife before he came to stand aside Torhild and Ubbe.   
'England overcame a lot. I remember the first viking raid that my father handled and now we are on a point that vikings almost are settled in our community. This is a new area for uss all and to cheer for that what is not better than a viking wedding?' He asked the people. King Harald, offcourse, raised his cup, yelled for Torhild and Ubbe. 'For my people who don't know, Ubbe is Ragnar second oldest son and Torhild is a daughter from the fearless Lagertha.' He introduced the both of them to his people.   
'On my sister and her futher husband.' Björn raised his cup for everybody. Torhild smiled and looked aside to Ubbe.   
'You sure you wanna do this, I'm not that easy to handle.' She whispered to him. He stroke his fingers under her chin and lifted her head a little.   
'And we are not even started about me.' He grinned, pressing his lips against hers. It was not that hard to play if she had already two of his brothers. Ubbe was as close to her like Hvitserk and Ase were. She wrapped an arm around his neck, almost enjoying it. The people that started to clap was a moment for Ubbe to pull back. He pulled her in a tender embrace, pressing his lips against her ear. 'If I had know that I had married you way before this.' He whispered. Torhild smiled and pulled back, giving him a little push against his chest. When she looked at her brother she noticed Hvitserk who smiled amused before he looked aside to his youngest brother. And Ivar ... Torhild crossed his gaze, she stared at him for a moment, maybe she saw something, pain? But it went so fast that she wasn't sure. He looked away, chlenshed teeth before he drank his cup empty. Torhild pulled her look away from him and forced that smile back on her lips.   
'Let the feast begin!' Annouched the king.

Everything was there, drinks, food, all kinds of company, even music to dans on. Torhild walked to her brother and embraced him. 'I still can imagine you as that little girl, always knowing better, running of.'   
'I wasn't that kind of girl.' She shook her head in protest.   
'I'm proud of you sister. You had your part here and you overcame it. I'm really proud, you deserve a throne, a life Torhild.' He stroke his fingers over her cheek and she nodded slowly.  
'Don't get me crying.' She rolled her eyes.   
'Princess Torhild?' Somebody asked. Torhild turned around to a grey old man who looked at her from top to bottem. She bowed polite for him and he smiled softly in respons.   
'It feels like I know you.' He began. And that was something she didn't saw coming. Her eyebrown came up, a little confussed and he only chuckled softy. 'Back in the day when you mother came here with king Rangar. I was a adviser of King Ecbert and I was often with him and so your mother and Ragnar. You look like your mother.' He complimented her. Torhild bowed again, still a little confused.   
'Thank you.'   
'Your mother and King Ecbert were pretty close if you know what I mean.' He followed. Her eyes narrowed a little.   
'I don't understand. Can you clarify?' She asked curious. But before the man could answer that one the wooden doors flew open and her mother walked aside Halfdan.   
'King Aethlewulf,' she began, pointing her sword his way. 'The heathen army has arrived, we are coming for you.' Torhild turned, smiling towards the king. He started laughing, throwing his cup through the room.   
'I should never trusted you.' He yelled.   
'It was never build on trust.' Torhild hissed, stepping forward. She stood aside her mother and her brother came to stand on the other side, arms crossed, totaly in his comfort zone. Torhild looked around to the vikings who killed the soldiers, pushing the guests in the same direction.  
'Let me guess, Lord Edgar is already dead?' He guessed.   
'A week after I've been stabbed.'   
'He suffered.' Ivar smiled dark. King Aethlewulf looked at him and it gave Ivar only more power. 'You wished you never had done what you did past week.' He crawled a little forward, it was like he was ready to kill him.   
'This is Torhild her kill.' Björn warned him. Ivar held still, his eyes traveled to Torhild.   
'Mine.' She repeated. He clenshed his teeth but didn't protest on it.   
'Kill me, do it, get it over with, god will protect me.' The king said. Torhild looked to his wife and childeren.   
'I will give you a Christian dead.' Torhild said, looking away from his childeren to the king again. Lagertha looked at her and gave a reassuring smile. 'But you will die on the settlement, among my people.' She followed.   
'Take him.' Björn commanded. Torhild turned around and wanted to walk out.   
'You should blood eagle him.' Ivar hissed. She turned around and looked at him.   
'I'm not you Ivar and you are not longer controlling me, that was your own fault.' She reacted. She saw strugglings in the corner of her eye and when she turned around she saw the king pull a knife, getting straight for Ivar. Torhild pulled her own knife and pushed it in his chest before he could get to Ivar. The king grabbed her, trying to get that knife of his in her body while he fought of the pain of his own stabwound. Ase pulled the knife out of his hand and Hvitserk pushed him away from Torhild. The king felt on his knees, gasping for breath while the blood staint the ground. Torhild looked to her knife and let it fall to the ground. 'Your king is dead.' She said for the people. Her eyes looked to Ivar and she slowly shook her head before she walked out. Hvitserk and Ase directly after her. It wasn't supposed to go like this, she had other plans for the king but her instinct to protect Ivar was just bigger, leaving a dead king on the ground and a girl that wanted to go home.


	35. // 34 //

The ocean looked so calm and steady but she knew underneath the surface there was a whole other storm passing by. It looked at lot like her. Torhild showed calm and steady but in fact she was lost in her own body, torn between hate and sadness, guilt and regret. Past two weeks were heavy, she felt like she was trown from the one part to the other. But they had a lot of business to handle after she stabbed king Aethlewulf. Her mother and brother putted parts of the heathen army crossed over England, keeping peace where needed. Ubbe and Hvitserk pulled the settlement back on it's feet so they could live on like before. Torhild just gazed over the ocean from time to time, looking how the boats got filled with treasures of all kind. She laid down on her back in the sand, staring at the blue sky, hands resting on her stomach. Until that white horse showed up again and turned the blue from the sky in the bleu of his eyes. Torhild didn't move, she just let him get of his chariot until he sat right next to her. Torhild kept looking to the sky, not wanting to see the distant he put between the two of them. 'You're going home.' He said, like it was the first time he heared of it.   
'And you are staying.' She replied, pushing her body up, wrapping her arms around her knees. After minuts of silence she looked aside to him. 'We had it worked out very differently a couple of weeks ago.' She whispered. He turned his head and looked at her, but it wasn't the same. It wasn't the Ivar she always had knew. It was like she looked to a stranger.   
'Well,' he felt silcent and Torhild nodded slowly.   
'You do this to yourself Ivar, I could handled you and you just wouldn't let me.'   
'Your not safe with me.'   
'That's my choice to make.' Her voice trembled a little. She stood up and turned around to him again. 'You broke my heart. Don't be reckless when I'm not around, I still care about you.' And she walked away. Not willing to hear his answer or words. She just walked away, saddened that this was a goodbye.

'We have a last meeting.' Ase announched. No answer. 'You still feel sick?' Ase asked from in the doorway. Torhild jumped up from the bed.   
'I will get over it.' She smiled before walking aside her friend to the great hall.   
'What do you think will happen if we are home again?' Ase asked. Torhild pulled her eyebrows up, surpriced.   
'I thought you wanted to stay.'   
'I'm not staying behind with Ivar. And I'm you're right hand so where you go I follow.' She smiled. Torhild stood still in the middle of the road and turned to her friend.   
'I couldn't do this without you Ase, you know that right?' Ase nodded, looking to the ground for a moment, a little shy maybe. Torhild wrapped an arm around her friend and the rest of the way to the great hall they did in silence. When she stepped in the others where already there. She bowed before her mother and stood aside the other brothers. Ivar sat far enough so she didn't had to look at him, instead she had most of her eyes on her own brother and Hvitserk who stood aside her.   
'It's our last meeting as a group, althrough I regret a couple of dessicions,' Lagertha began, looking at King Harald to start with. She never punished him for his try to take over Kattegat, must be an regret. 'we came out this stronger. But it's time for some of uss to go home, to find adventures somewhere else.' Lagertha looked aside to her son before she looked to Torhild who softly smiled. 'Halfdan will stay, Ivar will stay.' Her mother must be relieved about this, Ivar away from her daughter.The both of them nodded and Torhild felt a part of herself falling apart again. She was over two years away to become a shieldmaiden, she left him then, now he was leaving her.   
'I will visit uncle Rollo again, looking for new lands to raid.' Björn announched.   
'I will come!' King Harald offered. She knew Ubbe would stay in Kattegat to pull out more defenses, he helped her mother and she was thankfull for that.   
'Torhild,' Lagertha began. Torhild nodded, knowing what she would say. 'What Björn said a couple of weeks ago is true, to union the Heathen Army we have to bring the two families in power together.' She explained.   
'I will marry.' Torhild nodded. And if Ubbe was already married and Ivar wouldn't turn back home there was only one son of Rangar left. But she didn't looked aside to Hvitserk, she saw flashes of pain passing by Ivar and she closed her eyes trying to get in power of her own feelings. But it didn't worked so she walked out. The fresh air maked her thoughts a little brighter.   
'You don't have to marry me.' Torhild turned around to Hvitserk who walked from the steps before the great hall.   
'It isn't that.' She forced a smile on her lips.   
'Ivar?' He asked. He walked over to her, so close she could fell his breath on her face.   
'It needs time.'   
'I will love you in a way he never could. I won't hurt you, push you away, I'm not him.' He convinced her. Torhild brought her hand up and stroke his jawline.   
'I know Hvitserk and I love you for that, but give me time to look how to do that again, loving somebody.' She explained while he wrapped his arms around her waist.   
'All the time you need love.' He whispered. She looked in his eyes before she placed her lips on his, giving him a gentle uncertain kiss. He wanted so much more, she spotted it in his eyes but he hold back. He won this game. The jealousy between the brothers had always been heated and Hvitserk had won. He won over her body, he got his marriage but her heart ... her eyes lowered down to his chest. She rested her head against in, looking for the comfort he always could give. For as long she was here she always had to choose, she always would in the struggling. Staying and trying to safe Ivar from himself, despite the pain it would cost her or going home, marrying a man that never asked to much and loved her with all his heart. One day ... just one day and she would get on that boat, or maybe just stay. But everytime she looked to Ivar she asked herself if it was worth it. Past weeks were a torture for her and he putted her in it without improvement. She wasn't sure, she wasn't sure of anything, even marrying Hvitserk had his doubts. Small steps, first she had to get away from this place, getting things in order before she could move on. Her heart was still with Ivar for a part and she was terryfied to leave that part from herself behind. Afraid to leave him behind.


	36. Chapter 36

The darkness armed her, the sounds of a feast in the great hall drummed in her ears but Torhild wasn't attending. She just looked in front of her, laying on the bed while she listened to the sounds of laughter. Torhild didn't turned her head when she recognized the sound, the distinct sound of his body crawling in. She didn't moved, pretended she was sleeping when he pulled on the bed, wrapping an arm around her waist. She hoped he would say something, anything but he didn't, he just fell asleep besides her. And when she waked up the next morning he was gone and she felt alone again. There was some part of him still caring about her but he wouldn't admit to it. He wouldn't give up his power to go back to Kattegat so how big was his love? He didn't protest against her marriage arragement with Hvitserk, so what did it meant? She walked over to the great hall and saw him sitting on the steps before. He didn't looked up, he was carving wood again, pretended that he wasn't there last night so she pretended she never noticed him. 'Ready princess?' Ubbe smiled. Torhild looked up to him and greeted him with a short bow. Her mother just walked out when she walked in.   
'We missed you last night. Are you feeling oke?' Lagertha asked her. Torhild looked a short moment towards Ivar before she nodded.   
'Eager to get home.'   
'Me to.' Lagertha stroke her cheek.   
'Mother.' Torhild stopped her mother before she could walk further. 'On the feast from the king, just before you arrived I spoke a man, an old adviser of King Ecbert.' She began. Lagertha looked to Ivar who held his eyes on the both of them, listeting over the conversation. Lagertha stepped further and Torhild frowned her eyesbrows, walking after her mother. 'He knew you, said you had a connection with Ecbert. He was interested in me,' her voice fadded when her mother finally turned around to her daughter.   
'That was a long time ago.' She answered.   
'What did he mean with that connection?' Torhild asked. Lagertha looked at her for a moment.   
'I explain home.' She smiled before walking further.   
'Mother.'   
'Torhild, home.' Lagertha maked clear. Torhild nodded and turned around, Ivar was still watching.   
'What is it?' He asked, a little unintrested even.   
'Nothing of your concern.' She reacted, walking back in the great hall, leaving him with that frustration again. Her brother sat after a table with king Harald and Hvitserk, making plans for the mediterranean sea again. 'Already?' She asked. Björn looked up with a amused grinn.   
'Don't worry, we stay at least a week home before we go.' He reassured her. A week .... She rolled her eyes, a little amused.   
'You don't coming princess.' King Harald asked. She was surpriced he was the one who offered and not her brother or Hvtiserk. She wouldn't hold Hvitserk back, she knew how much he wanted this.   
'Maybe.' She nodded. Not immidiatly, she needed time to set things in order.   
'You don't have to.' Hvitserk said. Torhild looked to hum and smiled softly.   
'Somebody needs to protect my future husband.' Her voice airy, nonchalant while she walked back outsite, leaving the three of them laughing.

The white stallion from Lord Edgar was gone. Torhild looked the stables around for the last time before she walked back to the center of the settlement. This was her last walk, it felt like she was leaving some things behind. Not only Ivar but her pain, the memories. That stallion was one of those memories and when she arrived at the center she saw him before Ivar his chariot. He changed that old white horse for this mighty animal. He was full in armor, like he was going in battle already and they didn't had left. Lagertha said her goodbyes but not to Ivar. Torhild stroke the white stallion over his neck before she walked over to her mother. 'Ready?' Lagertha asked.  
'Let's go.' She nodded, looking over her shoulder to Ivar. They changed looks but he didn't say a thing. If he just did ... he make dit so easy for her to walk away.

A big part of the heathen army started sailing away. Torhild took Hvitserk his hand and climbed on after Ase. 'I'm gonna miss it.' Ase sighed.   
'I'm not.' Torhild reacted. Turning her body to look to the couple of men who stayed behind, Ivar was among them. He looked fierce, like he always was. But the sparks of concern weren't there.  
'You sure?' Ase asked her, caughting Torhild on looking to Ivar.   
'We will see each other again.' She murmured. Ase sat down on the egde of the boat while some of the vikings pushed him in water.   
'The question is how. He changed when Sigurd died, he will change with you leaving.'   
'He could stop me.' She protested softly. Ase nodded, both of them looking to the son of Ragnar who stayed behind.   
'He hasn't a brother to hold him back, he hasn't you. I'm not sure if you want to see him back Torhild.' Ase explained. Torhild looked aside, knowing that Ase started to knew him pretty well to in the past couple of weeks. And she was right, she had no idea how she would find him back. Would his soul be totally darkened? Would he be still alive? This could be the verry last time she would see him.   
'I have to.' Torhild whispered, leaving her hand on her stomach. Not for the sore spot from her stabwound but for something totally different. Ase looked down, her eyes widened.   
'From him?' She asked in disbelief. Torhild stroke her belly, fiding some balance while the boat sailed over the first waves.   
'I don't know what to do Ase.' Torhild whispered.   
'Listen to the gods to begin with, listen to your heart.' Ase replied. Torhild looked long enough to Ivar and he to her until he was just a little spot on the horizon, until she saw that white stallion galloping away.

The End.  
This story has already a sequel running on wattpad, I will upload The Cripple and The Shieldmaiden II here as soon as I can.


	37. Thank You

In all of this I need to thank the persons who read every chapter, the ones who voted, comment and even send me some messages. You have really no idea what it means to me to have such a way of admiring. I'm not a perfect writer and this was my first time in English so .... I hope I did good. Because of you all I write, I'm motivated and I'm always thinking of good ways to make it better. You are all so amazing for me. My heart breaks a little, knowing this part of the story will be over. Alround amazing and my forever thanks for everybody who read this story and supported me in it. I love you all. <3

Hope to upload The Cripple and The shieldmaiden II soon enough, if you can't waith, you can find me on Wattpad (LordAvanti) and ofcourse under the same name on Tumblr.  
THANK YOU ALL


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